TFSRTT 13

[13] Chapter 2. The Desired Appearance (6)

Because of the sound of running water from the bathroom, it seemed Ilias had already been awake for a while. When Fernsiana emerged after dealing with the accident in the bathroom, Ilias was already up.

Fernsiana was about to apologize for making noise in the middle of the night, but Ilias’s worried expression beat her to it.

“Did one of your wounds open up? Why is there so much blood? Did the pain wake you up?”

“Ah.”

Fernsiana awkwardly smiled and moved the bloodstained towel behind her back in the dim lighting. But Ilias, perhaps sensing she was trying to hide something, became more urgent in his questioning. Fernsiana raised her hand to stop him and cleared her throat.

“Well, um…”

“Let’s put on some ointment first. You—”

“No, I don’t need ointment for this.”

“Are you going to keep this up? Even if applying ointment hurts a little—”

“No, I mean, it’s not that kind of injury.”

“Huh?”

Ilias looked genuinely worried. Fernsiana swallowed her embarrassment and finally spoke.

“It’s, um… my period. So even if I apply ointment, it won’t stop the bleeding…”

“……?”

She cautiously looked up after her confession, only to see Ilias staring at her like his brain had completely shut down.

It was as if he’d heard something so absurdly unexpected that it triggered a mental overload. Fernsiana narrowed her eyes. Ilias finally regained his senses and spoke with a nervous smile.

“Wha—what? You can’t just spring that kind of thing on me… Even if you didn’t want the ointment, that’s not something you just—”

“I’m a girl.”

“What?”

He didn’t know?

For once, even Fernsiana was a bit taken aback. Ilias looked like he’d just been struck by lightning—completely blindsided.

He really didn’t know?

Sure, she hadn’t explicitly told him, but she assumed he had figured it out and just pretended not to know. She had let her guard down under that assumption, but seeing his stunned face—like someone who’d never even considered such a possibility—suddenly filled her with a sharp guilt for deceiving him.

“…Didn’t you already know?”

“Know what?”

“That I’m a girl.”

So he really didn’t know. Fernsiana pressed her lips together and made an awkward face. His utterly bewildered expression made it clear.

“S-Sorry… I’m actually a girl…”

“Uh… ah… uh…”

“Haha… I guess I wasn’t that committed to disguising myself…”

People didn’t seem to suspect her of being a girl, but she hadn’t gone out of her way to appear like a boy either. She simply didn’t have the luxury to. So she thought anyone observant would’ve caught on.

“…You really didn’t notice?”

“Not at all!”

Ilias shouted, clearly in shock. Fernsiana involuntarily chuckled, then quickly coughed when he shot her a glare.

“Not even in my dreams…”

“Well, I figured since I’d be traveling alone, and since I’d already cut my hair…”

“Your hair…”

Fernsiana had never seen Ilias look so disoriented—it made it hard not to laugh. She suppressed the urge, feeling it was wrong to laugh after deceiving him. Then Ilias suddenly stood up, snapping back to reality.

“Ah—your period… Does your stomach hurt a lot?”

“Huh? A little…”

“Do you… do you have what you need?”

“I brought some just in case.”

“Oh, okay…”

Ilias sat back down. A quiet silence fell between them.

Before Fernsiana could say anything else, Ilias spoke up.

“Is there anything else you haven’t told me?”

“Huh?”

“Anything else you’re hiding?”

Fernsiana just looked at him for a moment.

It was the middle of the night. The only lights came from a faint lamp on the bedside table and the light spilling from the bathroom. In the dim room, the only things that seemed to shine were Ilias’s silvery hair and his dark eyes. The phrase “eyes that shine” might seem poetic, but still—

“…No.”

She shook her head. Ilias didn’t respond for a moment, seemingly deep in thought. It was understandable. After all, the travel companion he believed to be a boy had suddenly revealed herself to be a girl overnight.

“But seriously… you really didn’t know?”

“I told you—I didn’t!”

“You’re supposed to be the best information broker in the capital.”

“Being an info broker doesn’t mean I get a file that says, ‘The boy named Feirun you’ll meet in Ronen is actually a girl,’ okay?”

“Well, other than the short hair, I didn’t really try to act like a boy. My build, too… So I thought you might’ve guessed.”

“If I had guessed, I would’ve booked you your own room right away!”

Now that he thought about it, Ilias couldn’t understand how he hadn’t noticed. He looked deeply ashamed. Even as pain began to throb in her lower abdomen, Fernsiana had to stifle a laugh.

“…Can you still make it to the capital?”

“Mmhm.”

She nodded. The pain and fatigue were real, but postponing the trip wasn’t an option. Being left behind and catching up later would be harder. It would be better to push through the day.

“…This is so shocking…”

“Huh?”

While Fernsiana finished cleaning up and adjusting her clothes, Ilias sat at the table, still in a daze.

She tilted her head while running her fingers through her drying hair. Ilias looked at her with a face that was half on the verge of tears.

“How could I seriously not have noticed?”

That seemed to be what shocked him the most. He even sighed deeply. Fernsiana nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I was surprised too. I really thought you’d figured it out.”

“I must’ve hit my head and lost part of my brain.”

He groaned after making such a dramatic conclusion. Fernsiana was spreading out a towel on the bed when she let out a soft laugh. Ilias, still distressed, looked up with a dazed face and began gathering his things.

“Wait, where are you going?”

“I have to get another room, obviously.”

He said it like it was the most natural thing in the world. Fernsiana shrugged.

“But you even crawled into my bed during naps before.”

“That was—! That was because I thought you were a guy!”

More than being upset that Fernsiana had hidden her identity, Ilias seemed genuinely flabbergasted that he had slept right next to her and still hadn’t figured it out. He raised his voice in disbelief before slumping his shoulders.

“I really didn’t know you were a girl…”

“Not like it changes anything.”

“How can you say that?!”

Ilias sighed again, looking at her sitting on the bed. Fernsiana blinked up at him. He hesitated for a moment, then pressed her hair down firmly—just like he always did.

She pointed at the bed Ilias had been lying in.

“How are you going to find another room this late at night? Gonna sleep under the stars?”

“If I have to, yes.”

“Forget it. Just go to sleep, mister.”

“You little—”

Ilias started to leave anyway, but Fernsiana pulled him back and pushed him onto the bed.

“My stomach hurts, I’m tired, and I already feel bad about lying. So I’d really appreciate it if you just stayed quiet and slept, Mister Ilias.”

“…”

“Okay?”

With that, Fernsiana returned to her bed and burrowed under the covers. Ilias watched her for a while before letting out a long sigh and flopping onto his bed.

Thud. A soft sound.

And then another sigh.

Fernsiana curled deeper into her blanket, trying to hide her giggles. Ilias threw a pillow in her direction.

“You little brat! You totally fooled me and now you’re laughing?!”

“Ahem. I didn’t laugh.”