Chapter : 35
Everything had returned to square one.
However, it was a different square one than the one I had originally written.
Calix’s love for me had begun, and my father’s conspiracy was underway—that part matched.
But Calix had become someone else.
Of course, he was the problem.
At first, it had been strange because he didn’t love me. Now he did love me—but it was still strange.
His personality, which had grown dark while nurturing his love in secret, obsessing and suffering in the shadows, had changed to openly expressing love and obsessing blatantly.
He maintained a certain distance, perhaps out of awareness of my father, but he positioned knights in a way that completely surrounded the ducal mansion, so wherever I went, they followed.
Moreover, whenever I went for a walk, he inevitably appeared in front of me.
In the end, I stopped taking walks.
A few days after I had been holed up at home, Rajiv came to the house.
The same Rajiv who had been secretly watching me from somewhere, hiding himself—he came openly!
Seeing him enter through the main gate of our house, I felt that even Rajiv, like Calix, had become strange.
It was like men of the shadows had come out into the light.
“What brings you here, Rajiv?”
I asked, on high alert, not hiding my tension.
Rajiv answered politely.
“Miss Kaelin Brockburk, I have come to convey the words of His Highness, the Crown Prince.”
“What…?”
“He wishes for you to resume the daily walks you used to take. You should not neglect exercise. He says you must take care of your health.”
“!!!!!”
Ha! Ridiculous.
Not some witch fattening me up to eat, but… “take care of my health”?
“Please tell him I will manage on my own. Whether I take care of my health or not is my concern.”
After all, what use is exercise to a condemned person awaiting death?
Actually, Rajiv had come on Calix’s behalf, but I boldly vented my displeasure, which I couldn’t show to Calix, directly at him.
But then Rajiv’s next words made me snap back to reality.
“Miss Kaelin Brockburk, what His Highness says is not mere advice. It is an order.”
“!!!!!”
He spoke calmly, without raising or lowering his voice, and I instantly realized my situation.
Rajiv hadn’t come as Rajiv.
He had come as the Crown Prince’s spokesperson, his representative.
How dare I defy the Crown Prince’s representative…
“Then, I shall be going.”
Rajiv left the house with stiff formality, and I muttered to myself while watching his back.
“Resistance and protest are not for when you’re in front of a man holding a sword.”
Get it together.
I’m not dead yet.
Now that I’m caught, my life depends on Calix!
The very next day after Rajiv’s visit, I resumed my walks.
And sure enough, as soon as I stepped onto the path, Calix appeared before me.
“I pay my respects to His Highness, the Crown Prince.”
“Kaelin, you’ve come out for a walk after a long time.”
Yes. It’s an order, so I can’t not come.
“Yes. I’ll try to start again.”
Even if I’m to die, maybe it’ll hurt less if I meet the sword with a sturdy body.
“It’s best to walk at a set time, like before.”
This is probably an order too, right? I have to do it at a specific time?
“Yes. Understood.”
I answered politely.
I had to cater to him again.
I had failed to persuade my father, failed to run away.
The plan to pretend to love Calix and beg for mercy couldn’t be used because of the marriage arrangement with Eden.
To say I loved Leon, then say I loved Calix, then claim that love was a mistake because I loved Eden and was marrying him, and now I had to say I loved Calix again?
Ha…
Even I thought I was a crazy woman, but soon, I would have to do it again.
But that would have to wait a bit.
I’d been caught just a few days ago; I couldn’t suddenly declare love from today.
For now, the best I could do was to avoid angering him as much as possible.
“Kaelin.”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
“Kaelin.”
“Yes, Crown Prince?”
Why does he keep calling my name?
“Can you call me Calix? I’d prefer it.”
“Ah…”
Just Calix?
Dare he ask me to just call him Calix?
“Don’t like it?”
He asked again when I hesitated.
I snapped to attention.
Don’t like it? No! I don’t dislike it! I have to do it!
Yes, if Calix wants it, I’ll comply.
“No! I don’t dislike it. I’ll call you Calix, Your Highness!”
“Just calling my name would be even better.”
Ah! Just the name!
Alright, alright!
“Yes, Calix.”
Ha… Even though the weather was rather cool, I felt like I was sweating.
Though his tone wasn’t forceful and even felt kind, it made me feel more awkward and scared.
Where on earth did that tone and personality come from?
In the end, he had fallen in love with Kaelin as I had scripted—but why was his personality different?
And why had his feelings suddenly reverted to the original script?
I mustered courage to ask.
I needed to understand him as much as possible.
Because the person beside me now wasn’t the Calix I knew.
“Crown Prince…! Calix.”
“?”
I spoke to Calix, who looked at me with eyes so gentle they felt unfamiliar.
“You didn’t like me. Why did your feelings change all of a sudden?”
“……”
Calix stayed silent and just walked.
It was difficult to ask him a second time.
Yeah, feelings can change.
The reason doesn’t matter.
Right now, I need to find the best way to respond.
I quickly spoke again.
“Do you really… love me?”
Let’s at least get the fact, not the reason!
Suddenly, Calix stopped walking and looked at me.
I stopped too, looking up at him.
“Kaelin.”
“Yes?”
“Do you really not love me?”
“Yes?”
What the…! Not love me?
Answering a question with a question?
I don’t love you, but I can’t exactly say I don’t love you… asking that way is wrong.
“I want to believe it’s true that you said you liked me—not a misunderstanding or a mistake.”
“……”
I couldn’t answer, so Calix continued.
“As I love you, the day will come when you’ll love me too.”
Ah…!
Just like that?
As if nothing with Eden happened, he wants me to love him now?
Okay, fine.
I thought I’d need more time, but apparently, not.
Then I just have to pretend to love you again as if the middle process never existed.
I even felt a sense of relief at his words.
It felt like a small path to survival had reopened.
I said firmly,
“I also hope to come to love you, Calix.”
I hope I can survive, Calix.
“Why did you want to marry Eden Dakkers? Did you really love him?”
Suddenly, Calix switched the topic to Eden.
I shivered.
So he hasn’t completely skipped over Eden…
No wonder it seemed like it was being treated as if it never happened.
What should I answer?
“When I said I liked you, Calix, you disliked me, and then Eden Dakkers proposed to me. As I’ve already said…”
I answered, avoiding too much talk of love.
“Do you accept whoever proposes to you automatically?”
“Eh?”
Ah, that’s how the conversation goes?
“Then I should propose too.”
“Eh?”
Propose?
“After breaking off with Eden, that is.”
“Eh?”
Break off?
I just repeated “Eh?” like a stunned fool.
Calix’s words leapt between leaps and logic, and I couldn’t find a proper reply.
Finally, we reached the park entrance, and Calix stopped walking, as before.
Was he again unwilling to enter the park?
“Lin, I should return now.”
He said that and disappeared with Rajiv, who had appeared again.
Hmm… he definitely doesn’t want to enter the park.
Was he embarrassed about fainting?
Ah!!!!
Or maybe it’s that?
Originally, Calix had avoided the park because of a bad childhood memory when Kaelin nearly fell into the river at Letian Park.
Even during the opera performance or the day the child fainted while being pulled, he had entered the park casually—but now that seems to have changed…
Ah, I don’t know!
My head was spinning, but I couldn’t comprehend his mind well enough to consider him my “written male lead,” so I set aside my thoughts and entered the park.
Yet at the park entrance, a thought about Calix resurfaced.
The day Calix had collapsed in the park, he said,
“No, Kaelin!”
Seeing the girl run to fetch a ball by the river, he had shouted that.
Right, I had forgotten.
What did that mean? Why did he mutter that?
I also remembered his expression then.
He truly looked pained…
Wait, wait!
Think.
He had fainted while pulling that girl.
Was there something I didn’t know?
Maybe there’s a reason why he became strange.
Until now, I had just been reacting to his unusual behavior without considering the reason.
But recalling his strange actions and words, I started to feel a stronger doubt about why he had changed.
“He awakened my memories and emotions…”
“Kaelin, it makes no sense that I said I didn’t love you.”
The words he said, which I hadn’t understood, came to mind one after another.
And after he fainted in the park, he started calling me “Kaelin.”
Come to think of it, around that time, his attitude had already changed.
And now, he reappeared at the park entrance, as if something stopped him from entering.
If it wasn’t embarrassment over fainting, but rather the trauma I had written into the story—the childhood near-drowning incident at the park—then…
“He awakened my memories and emotions…”
Memories and emotions…
Awakened memories and emotions…
!!!!!!!
What, Calix!
All of his strange actions and feelings flashed in my mind in a chain reaction, leading me to a certain conclusion.
I stood there, shivering slightly at the thought I had about Calix.
I had a gut feeling my assumption was correct.
It was the only way to explain his behavior.
Next time I meet him, I have to confirm it.
I turned around and stared for a long time in the direction Calix had disappeared.
