#98. A Clumsy Kiss of Love (2)
“You…”
A storm of thoughts swirled in her head.
For a brief moment, their lips met and then parted, and Sasha’s confused and complicated thoughts seemed to flow from her, just as Pavel, like Sasha, squinted his eyes.
But soon, he looked at her with a calm expression, showing that he wasn’t going to let this moment slide.
Sasha immediately sensed it.
She couldn’t avoid it any longer.
It was a moment when she had no choice but to make a decision.
“Pavel.”
Sasha called him.
“……”
Pavel stared at her silently.
Sasha hesitated for a moment, trying to collect her thoughts. Before answering his feelings, there was something she needed to confirm.
She lifted her gaze and asked,
“Weren’t you trying to become serious with Princess Irina?”
“……?”
“……”
A brief silence followed.
Pavel’s confused gaze met Sasha’s serious eyes.
He tried to guess why she would ask something like that, but Sasha’s transparent eyes showed that she meant exactly what she said.
So Sasha really thought that.
‘Did I really think that he was trying to get serious with Princess Irina…?’
Even after forming the sentence in his mind, Pavel couldn’t make sense of it and asked, not hiding his surprise,
“…What?”
Sasha, wondering if he didn’t understand, asked more directly,
“Before becoming lovers, what kind of relationship did you have?”
“No.”
Pavel firmly denied it, and his face twisted in frustration.
“Why would you think such nonsense?”
Pavel grumbled as if ready to lash out at any moment.
“That’s….”
Sasha listed the reasons that led her to suspect their relationship.
“Yesterday, you two were talking kindly together…”
“With her?”
“Yes. While I was trying on the dress, you two were laughing and talking in the drawing-room.”
“Ha.”
Pavel finally understood what Sasha was talking about and pressed his forehead with a sigh.
“We were talking about you.”
“…….”
So that’s what it was?
Sasha blinked quickly, surprised.
Pavel looked at her with a sulky expression, as if asking if she had misunderstood.
“…I also saw you hugging the princess.”
“Hugging? I hugged her? What do you… Ah.”
It took a moment, but Pavel sighed deeply.
“That was because she was about to fall, and I helped her. …Damn it. I should’ve just let her fall.”
Pavel muttered through his clenched teeth.
Finally realizing the truth, Sasha was surprised and stopped him,
“No, you shouldn’t have done that. If something like that happens again, you should always help her, not let her fall.”
Pavel looked at Sasha with eyes full of resentment.
“Then what? What if you suspect I’m cheating again, with such ridiculous accusations?”
“……”
Sasha realized that he was right.
Feeling guilty, Sasha shifted her eyes, avoiding his gaze.
But then, something came to mind, and she quickly continued,
“Princess Irina said she would send you a letter, just for you.”
“That….”
Pavel was at a loss for words.
Sasha was probably talking about the letter from Princess Irina that had arrived right after they returned from the palace yesterday evening.
And that letter was…
“The most popular places for women recently are Madame Beaudouar’s dress shop and Gatling Jewelers in the center of Senwa. I hope you like them, my lady.”
It was entirely about Sasha, from beginning to end.
Princess Irina knew Pavel wouldn’t respond to anything unrelated to Sasha, so she filled the letter with only things about her.
But to Sasha, who didn’t know the contents of the letter, it could be misunderstood.
They had laughed and talked together at their first meeting, hugged, and exchanged letters immediately afterward. That’s what Sasha would have thought.
Seeing Pavel silent, Sasha tensed her neck,
“I didn’t doubt you for no reason.”
“……”
Pavel’s lips twitched. He wanted to immediately deny this and say that she was wrong to doubt him without reason. But he had asked Princess Irina for a special letter to prepare a surprise gift for Sasha. He didn’t want to spoil it by mentioning it early.
But he also couldn’t leave this misunderstanding unresolved, so he said,
“There was something I needed to ask her. It wasn’t because I had any feelings for her. I swear.”
At his firm tone, Sasha finally understood.
With him saying it so strongly, she could no longer doubt the relationship between him and Princess Irina.
It seemed that there really was nothing between them.
So Sasha’s earlier suspicions were based on misunderstandings. The truth was…
“I’m not in any kind of relationship with her, and I never want to be.”
Sasha looked up at Pavel, her eyes soft.
Pavel’s red eyes were burning like hot flames.
His emotions were so intense that it felt like they might burn her just by being close.
If those feelings were directed at someone…
“Pavel, do you love me?”
The question that had been lingering on her lips suddenly escaped.
For the first time, Pavel, who had never backed down from her, flinched.
As his lips parted, Sasha asked with a trembling voice,
“Tell me. I want to be sure of your feelings. Why did you do that just now? And why have you been like this? Did I misunderstand, or did I really feel your love?”
“……”
After thinking and struggling for a long time, Pavel finally spoke,
“I love you.”
It had been bearable when he kept it to himself, but once the words left his mouth, everything inside him burst out.
“I love you. No, I’m in love with you. I want to be with you forever.”
“……”
“I can’t accept divorce. Stay by my side, please. Stay with me forever, as my wife, with your heart like mine.”
Sasha’s face turned red from hearing his passionate confession.
A cool breeze blew through the quiet terrace, but it did nothing to cool the intense heat between them.
After a while,
“Ah, um…”
Sasha cleared her throat.
“I know it must have been difficult to express your feelings, but thank you for telling me.”
Pavel, who had been holding his head down, finally raised it. Sasha inhaled deeply. She had to respond.
“Pavel.”
“Yeah.”
As always, the answer came immediately.
“When we first met, you were a child I had to take care of. Since then, I’ve always cherished and loved you, but it was like a family, like a younger brother. We were young, so I never thought of you like that. Never.”
As Sasha spoke, Pavel’s face twisted.
What he feared was true. Sasha had only ever seen him as someone she had to take care of.
His face darkened, and he didn’t want to hear any more. He feared there would be a rejection at the end of her words.
“But…”
Sasha shifted the mood.
“Recently, since you became an adult…”
Sasha paused, and Pavel, whose eyes were filled with growing hope, met her gaze.
She smiled and continued,
“I started to care about you. Not as a child to take care of, but as a man.”
“Then!”
“Wait.”
Pavel, who looked like he was going to jump with joy, froze with an expression as if he were about to cry out.
She almost softened but felt the need to say this.
“Pavel, I need to say something. About what you did earlier.”
“……?”
“The way you ignored my plea and held me forcibly.”
Pavel’s shoulders trembled.
Sasha spoke sternly,
“You can’t treat me like that just because you like me.”
“……”
“Not just me, but to anyone. Understand?”
“…Yeah.”
Even in this situation, she scolded him.
It felt like an old habit, something that had been drilled into her during their time together in the annex, teaching him everything.
Sasha realized, a little belatedly, that the tender atmosphere between them had been shattered by their conversation.
She awkwardly smiled and said,
“Now, it’s my turn to answer…”
Seeing Pavel’s face brighten again, Sasha couldn’t help but laugh softly.
She chuckled quietly, knowing Pavel was almost at his limit, then said,
“I like you too.”
“……!”
“…In the same way.”
Pavel’s face lit up with joy, but then it darkened.
He asked with a confused voice,
“Does ‘same way’ mean, like, as your husband…?”
“Pavel.”
Sasha reached out and touched the collar of his shirt.
Pavel instinctively bent down so she could reach him comfortably.
Sasha smiled as she thought about how he always considered her.
Without hesitation, she tightened her grip on his shirt collar and pulled his face closer to hers.
“……!”
Pavel’s eyes widened. This was very different from the brief kiss earlier.
The sensation of Sasha’s soft lips was much clearer this time.
And most of all….
“Hmm.”
Sasha’s warmth pressed through the slightly parted lips.
The sticky sound echoed, and Pavel’s heartbeat quickened.
Then,
“You should close your eyes.”
Sasha whispered as her lips remained against his.
Despite the ticklish sensation on his lips, Pavel obediently closed his eyes.
His eyelids fluttered, and Sasha smiled as she saw it, closing her own eyes as well.
The sounds of the wind, birds, insects, laughter, clinking glasses, whispers, and music filled the air.
But the only sounds that reached them were the soft sounds of their breaths and their hearts beating faster.
