Chapter 13
After leaving the dining hall, the place Cartian headed to was his office.
He had not come to work.
He simply needed a space to steady his heart. Time to organize his thoughts.
When he entered the office, Baron—whom he had left behind so he could eat alone with Lia—was still standing guard.
“I want to be alone.”
At Cartian’s words, Baron left the office.
He was worried by Cartian’s deeply sunken expression, but he had to obey his order.
Left alone, Cartian leaned back into his chair and let out a deep sigh.
He was reacting so strongly to every word she said… but she wasn’t.
The voice he had tried so hard to erase kept echoing in his head.
“People’s hearts are like reeds. Just like you didn’t expect this before losing your memory, you don’t know what will happen later either.”
“If people’s futures and hearts flowed exactly as they wished, life would be so easy.”
Yes. He knew.
He knew what she thought. He knew that her feelings would not change just because of a few words from him.
Even though he had already understood that, hearing it again directly from her lips was a shock.
A deep wound.
This was not a deliberate wound meant to gain her sympathy.
He was truly, sincerely hurt.
Painfully so.
It was all too clear.
The expression on Lia’s face as she said those words.
As if she were stating nothing but facts. As if there were no emotions at all.
That was how she spoke.
If only there had been even a trace of hatred in it, it would have been better.
At least then, it would have meant she felt something toward him.
But there wasn’t.
She truly did not care about him at all.
Her face wavered for just a moment when she saw his hurt expression—but that was all.
Just as he had thought, she did not stop him.
The fact that he had hoped, even for a moment, that she might stop him felt ridiculous.
Even though he had known all along.
His heart hurt unbearably.
It felt as if it were being torn apart.
What was sad was that even though it hurt this much, even though he was suffering because of her, his feelings for her had not faded.
He still loved her.
Even now, he did not feel like giving up on her.
Was it like this for her too?
When he had acted that way before losing his memory, had she felt the same pain?
The days he could not even remember filled him with unbearable regret.
