CHAPTER 09……………………………………
— Karhis, I love you.
A woman’s voice, sweet and soft, whispered near his ear as she stood on tiptoe. Her pale pink hair brushed against him, tickling lightly.
She smiled—lovely and radiant. Her watery eyes rippled like a gentle lake.
And in front of her, he—Karhis—was smiling faintly in return.
—
Karhis frowned and leaned lazily against the wall.
The woman smiling in that illusion… no matter how he looked at it, it was the same woman before him.
Since when had she started using tricks like this?
His gaze fixed on her—Psyche Benoain.
What is this? Seeing illusions like this… could she be a spy?
There had been countless spies, even in the North.
And every single one of them had died by his hand.
But never had anyone disturbed his mind like this.
So in the end… she’s no different.
Karhis let out a cold scoff and sighed deeply.
Pressing his throbbing temple, he tried to steady his fading senses.
Then he stepped toward Psyche, one step at a time.
“Why do you appear in my hallucinations? What kind of trick did you pull? Ha… my head feels like it’s splitting.”
His voice was irritated, almost angry.
Psyche, flustered, couldn’t say anything.
“The Crown Prince—or if not him, then the Duke of Benoain. As his daughter, you must be a pawn he sent.”
His voice dropped low, sharp and dangerous—like the growl of a beast.
As his footsteps approached, Psyche flinched and began stepping back.
But behind her was a cold wall.
There was nowhere left to retreat.
Her eyes darted rapidly as she tried to understand what he was saying.
His gaze followed her every movement relentlessly.
“N-no. That’s not it.”
Her voice trembled.
Her eyes shifted, her lips quivered as she bit them, her nose trembling slightly.
Karhis’s gaze briefly dropped to her flushed lips before meeting her eyes again.
He studied her coldly.
A faint, sweet scent surrounded her, brushing against his senses—but his reason held firm.
Then, slowly, he reached out and brushed his hand along her cheek.
The softness of his touch contrasted cruelly with the mocking smile on his lips.
Psyche’s heart shattered.
Her lips trembled pitifully.
She had resolved not to be hurt by his coldness—but her chest still ached unbearably.
She had prepared herself to accept his indifference.
She had.
So why did it hurt so much?
She bit down on her trembling lips, forcing herself to endure the pain.
How could she not hurt under that piercing gaze?
She had spent an entire day strengthening her resolve—yet it crumbled in a single moment.
Why did everything fall apart whenever she faced him?
Does Karhis really see me as nothing more than a pawn of the Benoain family…? Does he remember nothing from before the regression…?
Pain twisted her lips faintly.
Blinking rapidly under his indifferent gaze, she shook her head.
The realization struck her—
To the one she loved most, she had become utterly meaningless.
“That’s not it. I… I…”
Startled, Psyche began to hyperventilate.
Her breath came in ragged gasps.
Even so, she forced herself to speak.
“How could I possibly… do something like that? I—I can’t even do such things. How would I even…?”
“……”
“I can’t live without you. I mean it. I’ve never received such orders from my father. Hngh… how could I ever… do something like that to you…”
Her body swayed weakly as she spoke desperately.
Her words were disjointed, barely making sense.
Grabbing the curtain tightly, she steadied her trembling legs.
A clear tear fell from her watery eyes like a glass bead.
“Ah.”
It slipped down her cheek before she realized.
Karhis stared at her expressionlessly.
Her trembling voice, trying to sound calm despite her tears—his attention fixated entirely on her.
Her labored breathing, her tear-filled hollow eyes, her flushed cheeks, her fragile wrists—
And that faint, trembling smile.
Something about that expression pierced his chest.
Why is she crying?
Why did her tears look so unbearably sad?
Why did it hurt him?
What was she to him, that he couldn’t remain calm?
This hollow, burning feeling in his chest—it irritated him.
The sight of tears falling on her pale cheeks stung sharply.
A strange sense of guilt bubbled up.
Yet his suspicion was logical.
The Benoain family was known for its loyalty to the imperial family.
It wouldn’t be strange if her father had sent her.
“What are you…?”
His low voice carried deep resentment.
Why was he feeling emotions he had no reason to feel—for someone so insignificant?
“Why are you driving me insane?”
Just who was she?
Why did she bother him so much?
Why did he listen to her rambling words?
Why did her calm tone, her tears, her sorrowful lips make him feel like he himself was falling apart?
He didn’t know.
No one had ever shaken his composure like this before.
“Psyche Benoain. Who are you? Just who are you… to drive someone this mad? Did you use some kind of drug? Answer me.”
Grabbing her shoulders, he demanded.
His voice, usually calm and rational, now rang sharp and oppressive.
Psyche simply looked at him.
Her reddened eyes no longer shed tears.
Even under his fierce gaze, her lips slowly parted.
“I’m just someone who met you a long time ago.”
“What?”
Karhis frowned at the unexpected answer.
Despite his intimidating expression, Psyche did not back down.
Suspicion still lingered in his eyes.
“What nonsense. When have I ever met you?”
“We met. A long time ago.”
“I have no memory of that.”
“That’s fine.”
Because I remember, she murmured inwardly.
Suppressing the surge of sorrow, she forced a gentle smile.
No one could see the deep affection hidden behind it.
Her flushed cheeks made her look innocent, almost radiant.
Karhis felt a strange sense of déjà vu.
Her pure smile—it felt familiar.
But he couldn’t accept her words as truth.
There was no trace of her in his memories.
He pushed the thought aside and sighed.
“Someday… please remember me.”
“……”
“You’ll remember eventually. You promised you wouldn’t forget me. I believe in you.”
Though her voice was fragile, it was steady.
Her expression had already cleared, as if she had never cried.
Karhis remained unchanged—cold and indifferent.
Whenever he tried to recall anything about her, something blocked his thoughts, bringing a splitting headache.
It was easier—less painful—to treat her as a stranger.
“I don’t know you. And I won’t remember you in the future either.”
“That’s okay. With time, it will become clear. When that time comes…”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Let’s end this—now.”
Karhis scoffed and tilted his head back.
A deep woody scent lingered in the air.
He realized the pounding pain in his head had eased.
Yet the heavy drop of his heart—he couldn’t ignore it.
For a moment, his expression softened—then hardened again like a dangerous beast.
“If you ask a stranger to remember you, will memories just come back? Even if we met before, it’s pointless. A waste of time.”
“That’s—!”
“You’ve taken enough of my time. I won’t listen anymore.”
Glancing at his watch, he cast one last look at Psyche.
His gaze was cold, devoid of emotion.
To him, she was a stranger.
“We won’t meet again.”
“Duke!”
Without hesitation, he turned and left.
Seeing his back—it felt unfamiliar.
He had never shown her his back before.
Her chest ached faintly.
“Karhis.”
She whispered his name, pressing a hand over her racing heart.
