Chapter 30
‘I’ve already passed the message to Russell. Now, it’s up to his judgment.’
Tap, tap — the sound of my cane striking the ground echoed rhythmically.
But anxiety tightened around my chest. For some reason, I couldn’t shake the feeling that he wouldn’t make a sound or reasonable decision.
‘The North is under Russell’s control… If that’s the case, the guards must’ve reported long ago that my sister was on her way here.’
Then how could she have entered Glacies Castle without Russell noticing?
‘Unless… he let her in on purpose?’
A chill ran down my spine at that realization. Russell was more than capable of doing such a thing.
Outwardly, he always claimed to care for me — but inside, I never knew what he was truly thinking.
Still, if he knew that my meeting with my sister would cause chaos, why would he let her through?
While I was lost in thought, someone suddenly tripped me.
“Ah!”
I lost my grip on my cane and fell helplessly to the ground.
For a moment, I thought I saw stars. Pain burned through my knee, and as I tried to stand to check the injury, a sharp heel pressed down on my shoulder.
A wave of déjà vu hit me.
I had experienced this before.
“Well. Now that’s a perfect look for you.”
“Sis…!”
My sister’s bright, playful voice rang above me, as if my fallen state was the most amusing thing in the world.
The pain in my shoulder made it nearly impossible to lift my head.
“Ah—!”
Each time I tried to raise my head, she pressed down harder with her foot.
With every increasing ounce of pressure, the pain was one thing — but the humiliation, the sheer disgrace, was far worse.
Just like before — when I’d regained the memories of my past life, when she’d slammed my head down — it was the same.
That time, the flood of memories had left me too stunned to protest, but now… even though I could speak, the pain held my lips shut.
Finally, my sister spoke again, her tone dripping with satisfaction.
No doubt I looked pathetic — writhing on the floor like some kind of insect.
“Oh, poor Piana… you look so natural lying down there. What a perfect match.”
She snickered mockingly.
The pressure on my shoulder increased again. The pointed heel dug into my flesh so deeply I couldn’t even scream.
All I could do was bite back my groans.
“Piana, the ground suits you better. That’s your rightful place. So naturally, his side suits me far better than you. Don’t you think?”
No — that’s not true.
Russell might be secretive, but he told me himself that he needed me — even if only as a figurehead duchess.
Unlike the Duke of Lucianos, the people here actually needed me.
So I couldn’t, wouldn’t, give up my place as Duchess.
I glared up at her, unable to speak under the crushing pain, and my sister let out a scoffing laugh.
“You can’t even see, and yet you’ve got the nerve to look at me like that? Unbelievable…”
The pressure on my shoulder eased slightly.
I seized the moment and tried to push myself up — but then she spoke again.
“Hm? What’s this?”
“Don’t touch that!”
She must have noticed my cane.
Even if she trampled and stole everything else from me, that cane was one thing I refused to lose.
It was the first gift I had ever received — from someone who said they needed me.
But perhaps my desperation only piqued her curiosity.
I heard the sound of her picking it up — and then, once again, her heel ground into my head.
“Well, well. There’s no way a beggar like you could’ve bought something this fine… Ah, I see. The Grand Duke gave it to you, didn’t he?”
“Give it back! It’s mine!”
“Oh my. Are you saying it’ll get dirty if your own sister touches it?”
Her amused hum made my stomach twist.
I could hear her running her fingers along the cane’s surface — and though it wasn’t me she was touching, a sickening disgust crept over me.
“Hm. Quite nice. Honestly, it suits me better than you.”
Was I going to lose it too?
Would I always be this powerless — having everything taken away from me, again and again, just like in my past life?
The thought made my whole body burn. My mind went blank, and before I realized it, I had already moved.
“Give it back!”
I grabbed her ankle and bit down as hard as I could.
“Ahhh! Are you crazy?!”
“Ugh!”
She swung the cane wildly.
The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth. My nose stung as blood began to flow — but I refused to let go.
Only when my ears began to ring with a high-pitched, dangerous whine did I finally release her.
My sister panted heavily. I had never seen her face, but I could imagine her — frail arms trembling after beating someone.
No wonder the thugs back in the gutter all had such thick arms — this kind of violence took strength.
“I was just going to take this and help you up, but you bit me?”
“Give… it… back…”
“You’re disgusting.”
Her footsteps turned away. I reached out blindly.
“Wait—!”
She gave a low chuckle — amused by my desperation.
Then, in a voice that was both mocking and triumphant, she declared:
“I’ll be taking this.”
“Wait! Give it back!”
No matter how I reached out, my hands grasped nothing but air.
There was nothing left for me to hold onto — nothing that could serve as my eyes.
My sister burst into bright, cruel laughter.
Then, she leaned close to my ear and whispered coldly — all trace of amusement gone.
“The title of Duchess is mine. You just stay there and watch, like you always do.”
With her proclamation made, she turned and left — satisfied, unhesitating.
I, on the other hand, couldn’t move.
If Russell abandoned me too… if I was no longer needed as the Duchess — what then?
Would I be sent back to that house again, to wither away like a plant?
Her heels clicked farther and farther away, and darkness swallowed everything.
When even the sound disappeared, I clenched my teeth in helpless rage and sorrow.
Without my cane, how could I even find my way back to my room?
I’d told Asha not to bring my meal here — told her to stay away, thinking I could handle it alone.
I regretted that now.
“Ugh…”
When I pushed myself up, the shoulder she’d trampled screamed in pain.
I could almost feel the bruises swelling under the skin, purple and throbbing.
And then…
I thought I might cry.
Maybe I’d grown too used to the treatment I’d received since coming to Glacies Castle — the respect, the comfort.
Shame, humiliation, and self-loathing made my whole body tremble.
I groped along the floor until I found a wall, then leaned against it, slowly pulling myself upright.
The cold surface against my fevered forehead felt almost soothing.
I stayed there for a while, forehead pressed against the wall, cooling my thoughts.
Then, carefully, hand by hand, I began to move again.
Without my cane to check the ground, every step felt uncertain, frightening.
But what was worse than that — was the humiliation that wouldn’t fade from inside me.
It’s okay, I told myself. You’ve dealt with this before. You can walk without it.
“…Hic.”
But the wall offered no comfort.
I just felt so miserable I wanted to cry.
Why did my sister never change?
Was it because she sensed how I could never escape the gutter — that no matter what, a part of my soul was still trapped there?
Is that why she envied what I had, why she had to steal it?
Maybe she was right — maybe someone like me really did belong on the ground.
Even the ability to hear the voices of trees couldn’t protect me.
Trees stayed rooted in place; their branches couldn’t move to defend me.
If only I could see — if only I didn’t hear the trees — could I have kept what was mine?
Could I have lived proudly as Piana Lucianos?
My face felt hot and swollen.
I didn’t know how I would make it back to my room, limping like this — when suddenly—
“Ah!”
Someone caught me just as I was about to fall.
