Episode 10
“You’re heading outside the gates? Um… forgive me, milady. It’s not my place to interfere, but… well, a lot has happened, hasn’t it?”
“……”
“How long will you be out? Forgive my boldness, but you’re not thinking of going to the forest again, are you? Ah—my apologies. Still, if anything were to happen, it’s people like me who’d bear the blame. Please forgive me, milady.”
The gatekeeper, Pero—who dared to speak such words—was close with Ophelia.
With that same sour expression, as if chewing on something bitter, he would lecture his master’s younger sister without hesitation. Yet when that foolish girl Ophelia saluted him with a sloppy “Loyalty!”, he would burst into easy laughter.
As if her stupidity were contagious.
And whenever that happened—
Bella hated Ophelia Leora twice as much.
Just you wait until you come back. I’ll make you skip dinner.
To think she had come out here for such a fool.
Cursing her own pointless actions, she was about to turn back into the estate—
When someone spoke to her.
Someone who shone—no, blazed—in this dull, hopeless countryside air.
“Allow me to ask you something.”
Until that moment, Bellarusia had never been able to clearly distinguish the feelings that lay somewhere between dissatisfaction and satisfaction.
But what she felt now—
Was entirely different.
What… is that?
It was overwhelming.
The kind of intensity that couldn’t simply be ignored with a bored glance, nor crumpled up and tossed aside.
Had she seen him?
Or had he seized her gaze and pulled it toward him?
Bella felt as though she had suddenly become a tautly drawn arrow—
And the target she was aimed at was the silver-haired man before her.
There was no choice but to look.
The tension stretched through her entire being whispered from behind:
That one… that man…
What she was supposed to do with him—
That, she couldn’t decipher.
Only after he disappeared from her sight did the air return to normal.
As if a hand that had been gripping her lungs finally released her, she drew a breath.
It was unbearably unpleasant.
And yet—
His eyes were unbearably beautiful.
“Bella, my precious little sister. You saw clearly who has arrived, didn’t you?”
Her brother, dressed more extravagantly than she had ever seen before, called out to her.
Though they shared the same black hair and blue eyes, their faces were entirely different. The count wore an expression far more inflated than when he went to meet some minor provincial noble in the west.
“It’s the Crown Prince, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Then you understand what you must do from now on.”
“What must I do?”
“Oh, my dear sister! Even after I’ve shouted it into your ears so many times, you still don’t understand? Tsk, tsk…”
The count led her before a mirror.
“Look. Your beauty. You wouldn’t know, having grown up in this narrow estate, but your beauty is unmatched not only in Honwood—there would be none to rival you even in the capital.”
Beauty, to Bella, was no more significant than insects flying outside a window.
It existed.
It made noise.
But it held no meaning for her.
Though—
The Crown Prince she had just seen clearly belonged to a different realm.
“Your maid girl is fairly pretty too, but beside you, she only serves to make you shine more.”
The vacant gaze in the mirror sharpened instantly, glancing sideways at her brother.
“Why is that fool even being mentioned here?”
But her brother, intoxicated by his own ambitions and dreams, paid no heed to her tone or expression.
To him, a low-born maid was no more than a bug outside the window.
“Understand this. Any man who sees you will have no choice but to fall for you. When the dinner begins, catch his eye. Speak to him. If you possess such a refined weapon and do not use it, then you are a fool. Win him over. Bring glory to me—and to this house. Oh, wouldn’t it be nice if you fell in love as well?”
Love?
Bella let out a scoff.
Love weighed about the same as appearance in her mind—
But unlike appearance, it was more like an insect that kept knocking against the window.
Annoying.
Persistent.
“Bella, one day, you will fall in love.”
Strangely, when that fool spoke such words, she looked more foolish than ever.
“A love so intense it changes the life you’ve lived and the world you’ve known. A feeling where just seeing that person warms your heart… where you’d want to give them anything, as long as it makes them happy.”
Here we go again.
“So the love you’re talking about—is that buying pies and spending the leftover money on three books for one silver at the bookstore?”
At that time, a pile of pitiful books had been stacked beside Ophelia.
“W-well… of course, there’s love like that in those books, but… that’s not all of it.”
The fool, embarrassed, quietly pushed the pile behind her.
[After escaping the obsessive grand duke’s bed, now a mad tyrant…]
The title was so long it couldn’t even be fully read, and the garish red cover looked suspicious.
Ridiculous—for a fool like her.
Blushing slightly, she flipped the book over and changed the subject.
“If—if you want someone so much that you feel like breaking them or locking them away… you shouldn’t. If you love them, even if things don’t go your way, you should let them be happy.”
“I’m not interested. Go read your frivolous books.”
A fool was a fool because she was persistent.
“Romantic love isn’t the only kind of love. For example—I love you too!”
That memory was truly unbearable.
Her face, as she said those words, radiated such overwhelming foolishness that it felt contagious.
Bella shoved her away in disgust.
“I hate you.”
“That’s okay. Even if you don’t care now… one day, you’ll understand everything. So there’s no need to rush. There’s still plenty of time ahead.”
Her eyes, as she spoke of the future, were dreamlike.
As if she would remain by her side forever.
Bella shuddered.
“Be quiet!”
Ophelia Leora, whose already lacking brain seemed soaked in talk of love, went as far as singing love songs.
While shaking out blankets.
While cleaning the room.
While strolling through the garden.
Ah—how unbearable that sound was.
Even if Bella covered her ears and shut the windows, the echo of that voice lingered.
So even if she didn’t fully understand it—
One thing was certain.
Love was foolish.
And thus—
It was something she never wanted to go near.
Her brother was not particularly wise—rather, closer to foolish.
But he was meticulous when it came to calculating profit.
There was no way he would be infected by the same foolishness as Ophelia.
So Bella dismissed the word “love” at the end of his speech lightly.
Still—
That Crown Prince.
His existence alone was… unexpected.
Before entering the banquet hall, Bellarusia carefully examined the emotions that had shaken her.
“Understanding what you’re feeling is important, Bella.”
Sometimes, that fool was useful.
Sharp like an arrow.
Taut like a bowstring.
A feeling that could tear at her insides if left unchecked—or pierce someone if grasped.
If Ophelia’s words were true—
This wasn’t even worth half a coin as love.
So then, this must be…
Bella carefully extracted a recognizable shape from the tangled emotions.
“I want him.”
Saying it aloud made it clearer.
A body that seemed born from the plucked moon itself.
Even a drop of his blood—
Even a single glance—
All of it should belong to her.
“You’re practically the princess of Honwood, dear sister. If there’s something you want on this land, you must take it.”
But if she could not have him—
She would ruin him.
Make him bleed.
His blood would be red.
And his eyes—
Those imperial violet eyes—
If she pierced them, perhaps…
Bella recalled the scent of well-aged wine.
Spilling his blood would surely be more valuable than filling a barrel with fine wine.
I want to stab him—with these hands.
Though she became a beast every night, capable of tearing a person apart, she had never taken a life with her own hands.
Yet somehow—
If it were him—
She felt she could.
And perhaps—
She would feel joy.
“Bella, if it’s what you want, you can do anything. I’ll help you make it happen.”
Ophelia might not be reliable—
But she was still better than her brother.
“Milady, it is time to depart.”
A servant called for her in Ophelia’s place.
Bellarusia lifted the corners of her lips in a captivating smile.
I’ve found something I want to do, you fool.
* * *
Ah… what is this?
In the end, after staying up all night, I passed through the count’s front gate again.
Pero, just about to change shifts with the daytime guards, greeted me with a yawn.
“You said you’d take a few days off—back already?”
“Haha… that’s how it turned out.”
“Yaaawn. You’ve got it rough for someone so young. Hang in there. And make sure you make up with milady.”
“Y-yes, of course.”
Though the sun had yet to fully rise, the servants of the estate were already beginning their day.
“Ophelia? Where on earth have you been?”
“Ophelia! You brat! Do you know how worried we were?”
“Haha… I’m sorry. Were you all really worried? I’m fine, really. I just snuck in a nap somewhere—ah, I’m really sorry. I said I’m okay! Oh! Lasmin, shouldn’t you be heading to draw water from the well?”
Even with my cloak pulled low, people recognized me from all directions, stopping to talk—it was quite troublesome.
Damn it.
Was it because of this one cloak?
The deep navy fabric was pretty, sturdy, and neatly trimmed—
I actually liked it…
