17.
My shadow fell lightly across Zaka’s face.
Come to think of it, there was no tree shade here. If he was really asleep, the sunlight must have been blinding.
So I shifted my position until my shadow completely covered his face.
His features, shaded in muted tones, stayed perfectly still.
Is he really asleep?
I crouched down in front of him.
Truthfully, I knew.
Even if he still seemed young, Zaka was, in every way, already a man.
After all, when I had first met Rohwinas, he had been the same age Zaka is now.
The only reason I’d kept avoiding saying certain words was because I never had the courage to speak them aloud.
My gaze slowly drifted downward.
From his round head, down the straight line of his neck, across his broad shoulders, to his chest that rose and fell steadily. His crossed arms made the muscles in his forearms stand out.
And then I noticed something—his fingertips trembled just the slightest bit.
“Zaka.”
“…”
“Are you asleep?”
I reached out and gently stroked his hair. It was a little stiff, but it quietly accepted my touch.
The tips of my fingers brushed something soft. Tilting my head, I realized it was his ear.
I carefully smoothed his messy hair and then went back to patting him lightly.
“Are you really asleep?”
At some point, his ear had turned bright red.
And as if he could feel my gaze lingering, even his neck flushed scarlet.
“You’re not sleeping, are you?”
I teased him in a playful tone, and Zaka finally opened his eyes.
He glared at me, his face burning hot. His expression looked more sulky than anything else—like he thought I was some shameless flirt.
Honestly, he looked so cute that way.
“What are you doing?”
“What are you doing here?”
“I was resting.”
“Really? Then maybe you’ve rested enough now?”
I tried to keep the conversation gentle, but Zaka just stared at me.
When our eyes met, he quickly looked away. His face was caught between hesitation, caution, hope, and a hint of fear.
The healthy color in his cheeks drained to a pale white.
“You want to catch the culprit, don’t you?”
“…Huh?”
The unexpected question made him blink.
“The one who gave you the potion.”
“Oh… yes.”
“You want to catch them, right?”
“…”
I frowned slightly, pressing him again.
“You do want to catch them, don’t you? Yes?”
“…Yes.”
Zaka’s quick mind caught on immediately.
“And you want to find the antidote quickly, too, right?”
“Why are you suddenly asking this?”
“Answer. Quickly.”
“…”
“Or do you plan to live like this forever?”
I said it with a smile, but the weight in my words wasn’t lost on him.
His face twisted, as if he’d just bitten into something sour. Finally, he muttered,
“The antidote… I have to take it.”
“Then, until that time, wouldn’t it be right for me to take responsibility?”
In an instant, Zaka’s expression brightened.
His eyes widened in surprise, staring at me as if to search for the truth in my words.
“Stop staring. You understood me correctly.”
“Then…”
“Last time, I said too much. I wasn’t in my right mind either.”
A little embarrassed, I admitted it honestly.
Zaka sat silently for a while, then let out a deep sigh. Covering his face with both hands, he slowly rubbed down his features.
Then he sat up straighter and jerked his chin toward the spot beside him.
So rude.
I laughed under my breath and dropped down beside him.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead.”
“What were you doing all this time?”
“You’re already starting to keep tabs on me? That’s not really my thing.”
He seemed to understand I was joking, because he only shrugged.
“Did you think about it all the time?”
“Yes. I wondered where you kept running off to in the middle of the night. You didn’t come back… so I worried.”
He paused briefly, then added,
“And… I was jealous.”
“Jealous?”
“That test potion you gave me. I don’t think there was only one bottle.”
Zaka turned his head, meeting my eyes.
He was sharp—either he had seen something or heard the clinking of bottles.
It wasn’t something I could hide forever anyway.
And I had no reason to.
So I nodded casually.
“You’re right.”
“…One? Or two?”
“Three, including you.”
Zaka swore out loud.
I stared at him, stunned.
“What did you just say?”
He kept his eyes fixed on the pond’s surface and answered shamelessly,
“I coughed. Must be catching a cold. Cough, cough.”
The fake cough was so half-hearted it drained all my irritation.
“If you’re going to make excuses, at least make them convincing.”
There’s no world where swearing and coughing sound alike.
“I have no idea what you mean.”
I let out a long sigh.
“Anyway, listen.”
“Yes?”
“For now, let’s stay together.”
“…Yes.”
His gray eyes wavered like the rippling pond in front of us.
It would be fine. Somehow, we’d figure it out.
I hugged my knees and rested my chin on them.
The air was warm and sticky, but not unpleasant.
“The garden’s beautiful.”
After a while, Zaka finally replied,
“…It really is.”
We sat there together for some time.
“So what should I do?”
As expected, Zaka caught on quickly.
“When do you think you drank the potion?”
“Most likely at the Imperial banquet. Honestly, I can’t imagine any other time.”
“That’s my thought too.”
Zaka nodded in agreement.
“Searching through all the nobles who were there will be tough.”
“That’s why you should handle the attendants.”
“That’s no problem.”
“Wait—make sure they don’t realize what you’re after.”
“Got it.”
“I’ll say it again, because it’s important—don’t ever bring up the potion.”
“You think I don’t know that? I won’t get caught. Trust me.”
I sighed deeply.
“Honestly, I doubt we’ll find anything useful from the nobles themselves.”
“You don’t think the culprit is a noble?”
“No, the opposite. If it was a noble, they wouldn’t need to act personally.”
“So whoever it was, the attendants that day must have been involved.”
Exactly. To risk tampering at an Imperial banquet—the culprit wasn’t ordinary.
Of course, I couldn’t completely rule out the possibility of a commoner.
But in my mind, that hazy silhouette in the mist gained one more detail.
Most likely… a noble.
“I’ll poke around while pretending to look for work.”
“And if you get hired somewhere, better if it’s a high-paying household?”
“I told you, I was kicked out. Most noble houses won’t take me without a recommendation letter.”
“Oh? Well, I don’t belong to just any noble house either, do I?”
I teased, lifting my head. Then my heart sank.
Zaka was smiling faintly with his eyes lowered.
It was a soft, relieved smile—like someone who had finally let go of heavy tension.
“I almost killed someone.”
And that memory struck me immediately.
“I nearly did.”
When Zaka had said those words before, his face carried shame and guilt… but also a terrifyingly cold edge.
Well.
Once we caught the culprit, things would naturally end.
We’d find the antidote, and then go our separate ways.
There was no need to be curious about anything more.
We’d catch the culprit together.
We’d get the antidote.
And then part cleanly.
That was enough.
“But…”
Zaka hesitated, strangely unlike himself. Then he glanced at me cautiously.
“What?”
“Who are they?”
“Who?”
“The others. The other bastards who drank the potion.” He quickly corrected himself, but the hostility in his voice sharpened the last word.
He didn’t even try to hide it.
“I can guess one of them. But the other one…”
“The duke.”
“What?”
“Duke Ishtan Gladinare.”
“Why him?”
“That’s what I wonder too.”
“And the other one… is it really that Holy Knight?”
“Yeah.”
“…”
I could tell by his mouth exactly which curse he was saying. This time, at least, he kept it silent because I was sitting right there.
Still, he didn’t want to believe it, so he asked again.
“The one voted ‘Most Beautiful Man of the Year’?”
“…Yeah.”
Zaka clenched his jaw so tight I could see the outline of his bones.
For a moment, I thought steam might shoot out of his head.
So I reached up and patted his hair.
He flinched, raising one eyebrow, then twisted his lips in annoyance.
“Good boy, right?”
“…Am I a dog to you?”
But the fierce energy he’d carried just moments ago softened in an instant.
Yes, this was the way to calm him.
“Why do you keep treating me worse and worse?”
Zaka complained, but instead of telling me to stop, he leaned his head toward my hand a few times, almost unconsciously.
He probably didn’t want me to notice.
But his flushed face betrayed him—he wasn’t regretting it at all.
I had been about to stop, my arm already aching.
But when I saw that, I decided to endure a little longer.
