#97. A Clumsy Kiss of Love (1)
Love.
Whether it was family affection, friendship built from growing up together, or the trembling interest she felt as she watched Pavel become a man.
Or maybe it was all of them combined.
What mattered was this—Sasha loved Pavel. And that love was something she could say with pride anywhere, to anyone.
But—
‘I want to be with him forever, protect him always… but that’s just my selfish wish.’
She knew Pavel loved her too.
But to him, Sasha was family.
From the very beginning, when they first met, she had told him: “We are family.”
Back then, Pavel had scoffed. But for a boy who had never known affection, Sasha’s care and warmth must have been precious.
‘So I can’t crush his feelings, not when he might confuse love with guilt or responsibility for me.’
For Sasha, the happiness of the one she loved mattered most.
‘Princess Irina is beautiful, kind, and considerate.’
It wasn’t strange if Pavel’s heart was moved by her.
Maybe it would grow into deep love, or maybe just fade as a fleeting crush.
Either way, Sasha didn’t want to take away his chance to experience that kind of love.
With that thought, she steadied her heart again.
She raised her eyes to look at Pavel.
He was lowering his head, silent, worried that she might still be upset. That sight made him look both endearing and pitiful.
Sasha let out a soft sigh.
“Still, Pavel. It’s not like when we lived alone in that small annex. Things are different now.”
“……”
“We’ve stepped into a bigger world, and people are watching us. We have to try to live up to that trust.”
Pavel glanced toward the curtained doors. The fire burning inside his chest still hadn’t cooled. He regretted not crushing that man even more.
“Pavel.”
Sasha called again, and this time he looked at her.
Before she could say more, Pavel spoke first.
“I liked it before. When it was just the two of us, living alone.”
His low voice carried his frustration.
“Now… I don’t like anything. Except you.”
Heat rose inside him, reaching his head.
He buried his face against Sasha’s shoulder, sighing. His warm breath tickled her neck, making her flinch.
She gently pushed his face away.
“……”
Pavel looked up at her with a sulky expression, just like when he was a boy. It was so familiar, Sasha couldn’t help but laugh softly.
“Still, we can’t go back. Time has passed, things have changed.”
“……”
“So we need to make new connections. Friends, acquaintances… people to rely on.”
She worried about Pavel’s narrow world. Maybe now was the time to help him grow it.
Pavel frowned but listened quietly.
‘Maybe he’s calming down now.’
Seeing him like a big loyal dog, Sasha thought it was the right moment.
She softened her voice.
“Pavel. If one day you meet someone you like… confess to her. Make her your lover.”
“……”
At least he didn’t explode right away. That was something.
She quickly continued.
“And if it grows serious, tell me. Then I’ll divorce you so you can marry her instead.”
She finished with a small smile.
But—
“…What?”
Pavel slowly lifted his head. His face was cold, terrifyingly so.
Sasha had never seen him like this.
“Pavel?”
He clenched his teeth and dragged his hand down his face. His eyes still burned with dark emotion.
Tap, tap.
He drummed his fingers on the railing. The small sound struck Sasha’s ears like thunder, making her heart pound faster.
Then—
“Lover.”
“Divorce.”
“Remarry?”
He repeated her words one by one, spitting out a harsh breath.
The atmosphere turned heavy. Sasha shrank back without realizing.
‘Of course I knew he wouldn’t just accept it… but I didn’t think he’d get this angry.’
Pavel’s fists tightened. His voice came out low and rough, like a wounded beast.
“You’re saying this just to drive me insane, aren’t you?”
Sasha’s eyes widened.
Pavel glared into her golden eyes.
“Don’t even think of running away.”
“Run away? Pavel—”
She reached out to hold him, but he was faster.
His rough hand cupped her cheek, brushing over her ear.
The smooth leather of his glove rubbed her skin, making her shiver. A soft sound escaped her lips.
Pavel’s eyes lit up.
“Sasha. My wife.”
His teeth clenched as he slowly caressed her ear.
Inside, he fought the urge to rip away the barriers and read her every thought, every secret she kept from him. He had always restrained himself, hiding behind gloves and buttoned shirts, never touching her bare skin.
But right now, he wanted to know everything.
He lowered his head, whispering darkly.
“You saved my life. So you’re responsible for it. Until death.”
His heavy, smoldering voice pinned Sasha in place.
Her eyelashes trembled as she shut her eyes.
What came from him wasn’t youthful affection. It was thick, consuming desire.
She could no longer deny it.
The one Pavel longed for with all his body and soul—the one he truly loved—
‘It isn’t Princess Irina. It’s me.’
Just yesterday, she had thought she misunderstood his feelings. But now, the truth was undeniable.
“…Pavel, isn’t this… too close?”
She tried to push him back, but his solid body didn’t budge. He only drew nearer.
“……”
“……”
His face filled her vision—his eyes, his nose, even the tiny mole under his right eye. They were close enough to breathe the same air.
‘At this rate, our lips will—!’
She jerked back, but his arm around her waist held her firm.
Pavel looked at her struggling and smirked.
“Why, my wife?”
“Step back. Or else… something embarrassing might happen.”
“Really?”
“Yes. So just move a little—”
“But, wife. Isn’t this exactly what husbands and wives do?”
He pulled her close and bent down.
Their noses brushed, and their lips touched lightly.
A soft, warm, gentle kiss.
