You Died – Chapter 043
Was it because I had never used so much holy power at once?
As if warning me that I had overdone it, the holy power churned violently inside my body.
The power overflowed, yet perhaps because my vessel was too small, pain flared in my heart.
“…It’s all been erased,”
Raymon murmured, as if speaking to himself.
Clutching my chest, I replied,
“…Y-yes. It seems so.”
I forced down my overheated breath.
The monsters at the boundary were gone, yet the sounds I’d heard just moments ago lingered like echoes in my ears.
Perhaps because it was pain I’d never felt before, my mind grew hazy. I could clearly feel the holy power refilling me even as it drained away.
With feverish eyes, I looked up at the sky.
Clouds dyed with a peaceful sunset filled my vision, as though nothing had ever happened.
I let out a long, hot breath. I should have felt proud—but instead, a sudden emptiness washed over me.
Had God not abandoned me after all?
Had He truly not abandoned me?
Was it because He hadn’t abandoned me that He granted me this power in this life?
“…Then why did You treat me that way until now?”
I had called out to Him so many times.
In my previous life, and the one before that—how many times had I called Your name?
Even now, instead of feeling grateful that You had finally answered me, I complained petulantly, like a childish fool.
Whether this, too, reached God—or whether He still wasn’t listening—I had no way of knowing.
I just wanted to complain.
A short laugh escaped me, my trembling lips quivering.
My half-sunken vision blurred more and more.
Tears slid sideways, soaking my ears. Perhaps because of that, it felt as though I were alone in a deep cave.
It felt as if someone were repeatedly poking my heart with a needle—slow, stinging pain, as though it were being burst very gradually.
“Saintess?”
Was Raymon calling me?
The voice reached me faintly, like I was trapped underwater. I tugged weakly at the corner of my lips.
When I slowly lowered my head, Kardin was there again at the edge of my vision.
He was quite far from where I stood. This time, I hadn’t meant to look.
Yet a laugh rose in me anyway.
My usefulness—here, I had value as a saint.
I… had been of help to you.
Cough.
“Saintess!”
“Saintess! Are you all right?!”
Alec and Raymon entered my wavering field of vision from either side.
Honestly, I recognized them mostly by their hair color. Well, the distance helped too.
But why did it feel like you were the one getting closer and closer?
My consciousness drifted.
With the final thought that I just wanted to close my eyes for a moment, free of all burdens, darkness fell over my vision.
The knights’ swords, having lost their purpose, lowered to the ground.
Kardin was the same.
Everyone had felt it—the sacred power that no one could dare approach.
It was the same power the Saintess had used when she saved Rion. No—this was on an entirely different level.
It was enough to send shivers down one’s spine.
Kardin swept his gaze around.
It was hard to believe a battle had taken place; the land was completely unmarked. Even the monsters’ blood had vanished, leaving it as pristine as the primordial earth.
Just yesterday, when she had created the barrier, the Saintess had looked flustered, as if it were her first time.
Kardin’s gaze stopped on Shallen.
She was looking up at the sky, tears streaming down her face, layered with long-suppressed emotions.
And yet, at the same time, a smile hung on the Saintess’s lips.
Whenever he saw that expression, something heavy seemed to settle in his chest.
Her once pale face and neck flushed red.
Though everyone around them murmured and looked about, she seemed not to hear, trapped deep in her thoughts.
When the Saintess lowered her head, their eyes met.
In truth, it would be more accurate to say that he had been staring at her intently.
The Saintess smiled brightly at him—a smile like that of a child seeking praise.
Perhaps because of that, he found himself walking toward her as if entranced.
Despite her relieved expression, she somehow looked fragile, and before he knew it, he quickened his pace.
Then the Saintess coughed and spat up blood.
Perhaps she hadn’t even realized she was bleeding—until that moment, she had still been smiling.
As her smile slowly faded, Kardin’s strides grew longer, and he broke into a run toward her.
“Saintess!”
“Saintess!”
As Raymon and Alec shouted, the knights’ attention snapped to her.
Hearing the startled footsteps of knights rushing up behind him, Kardin raised one arm to stop them.
The Saintess he knew wouldn’t want others to see her like this.
As she collapsed with her eyes weakly closing, Alec and Raymon caught her and held her up.
But she gave no response, already seeming unconscious.
Having come to her side, Kardin immediately lifted Shallen into his arms.
“We should move her somewhere else for now.”
At Kardin’s low voice, Raymon nodded.
Alec frowned deeply, biting his lip. As Kardin moved past him, he asked,
“Is it a sight the holy knights must not see?”
“……”
Alec did not answer. In truth, countless knights behind them had already witnessed Shallen using her holy power and collapsing.
Of course, he intended to keep Shallen’s power a secret from Paviban—but was there really any way to stop it from reaching his ears?
What order would the Saintess give them? What would she want?
She would not want it known that she had revealed her power.
If the holy knights learned of it, the risks would only grow.
If it reached Paviban’s ears, and Alec remained silent, he would no longer be able to act as the spy the Saintess had commanded him to be.
When Alec’s expression twisted sharply, Kardin took it as answer enough and spoke,
“I will take a different route. Your Highness, please keep silent as well. All the more so if it is connected to the Saintess’s collapse.”
“…As you say, Duke.”
Without even turning around, Kardin addressed the knights.
“Speak of today to no one.”
After issuing the brief command, Kardin walked away. No one there asked why he had said such a thing.
The Duke’s knights moved as one, dropping to one knee.
It was their pledge to obey.
“There’s no need to worry about the Duke’s knights.”
Alec quietly watched Kardin’s retreating back, then turned his gaze to the others.
They kept their heads bowed, not watching their lord depart, waiting until he was completely out of sight.
Grand Duke Ferdian—he showed no hesitation, as if he already knew the Saintess would not want this revealed.
Raymon, who had been watching Alec, added casually,
“The Duke is someone you can trust. When we return to the camp, say that the Saintess was exhausted and went to sleep early.”
It was true—he didn’t seem like someone who would act recklessly.
“Where is he taking the Saintess?”
“Probably into the forest.”
But wasn’t that near the lakeside, a place where they might run into knights?
“The Duke knows this borderland better than you do.”
“…Understood.”
Raymon was confident the Duke would head somewhere other than the forest the knights knew.
He would likely return once night had fully fallen.
In any case, Raymon himself bore responsibility for the Saintess’s collapse. The knights of the Kingdom of Nicholas must not learn of it either.
If anyone found out… judging by the look on Kardin’s face earlier, he didn’t think he’d be left unscathed.
Raymon ran a hand over his forehead. The knights of Nicholas would soon come to stand watch for the night.
How was he supposed to explain that the monsters were gone—and that even the bloodstains had vanished?
A deep sigh escaped him.
Not long after, raindrops fell from the clouds that had impossibly held the sunset.
“…Ha.”
Was there really a god?
If the god Gloria truly existed, then He must surely cherish the Saintess as she was now.
Once Kardin was completely out of sight, Raymon shouted to the knights,
“Everyone, prepare to return.”
