chapter 49
“……Is it such a difficult request?
Didn’t I say I’d prove it?”
“What exactly?”
“That I can sleep well even when you’re watching.”
“There’s no need to prove that.
It’s not like we’ll be sleeping together like this all the time.”
Lincia answered irritably.
In truth, she still didn’t trust Harvich.
Even if he acted affectionate now, she knew it wouldn’t last long.
She had once seen with her own eyes how a man who had been tender toward her could turn cold in an instant.
A stiff face, a rigid expression, and the look of someone filled with regret.
That was the expression Harvich had shown her the morning after they spent the night together.
“……Forget it.
It was a mistake.”
She knew Harvich wasn’t the type of man to see another woman while married.
So, he must have simply released two years of pent-up desire on her and then regretted it afterward.
He must have felt ashamed that he had given in to his own weakness.
“From now on, I suppose we’ll sleep like this every night.
We’ve joined bedrooms, haven’t we?”
The only reason he was behaving like this now was because he hadn’t been able to sleep.
Otherwise, Harvich would never act this way toward her.
“……So please, stay by my side.”
“That’s a difficult request.
It’s morning.
I just woke up.”
“Thank you.
I realize it’s shameless to make such a request in the morning.”
“Wait—did you even hear what I said?”
Harvich got up and drew the curtains closed.
Once he did, not a single beam of light entered the room.
“Stay with me until I wake up.”
“……”
“If that’s too difficult, then you can just sleep with me.”
Harvich lay down beside her.
Because of his gentle pull, Lincia ended up lying down as well.
They faced each other.
As if that weren’t enough, he reached out and took her hand.
“May I hold you?”
When Lincia parted her lips to speak, he extended his arm.
One arm supported her head, and the other gently wrapped around her waist.
Their upper bodies pressed close until they touched.
He buried his face in her shoulder.
Feeling his warmth so close, Lincia’s body stiffened.
“You didn’t answer me.”
Harvich didn’t respond to her words.
He just closed his eyes and breathed evenly.
Then, a beat later, he spoke.
“……Ah.
Didn’t realize that.”
Harvich opened his eyes slowly.
Half-lidded red eyes turned toward her.
“Are you uncomfortable like this?”
Lincia realized that no matter what she said, he would take it as something positive.
So she didn’t answer.
“The castle is still being organized.
It’s noisy.
Please don’t leave the bedchamber.”
“……”
“If you get bored, you can draw.”
She hadn’t intended to respond, but the ridiculous remark slipped out of her mouth.
“What?”
“……Where are you planning to work?”
Lincia looked in alarm toward the door she assumed led to his study.
Normally, the room adjoining the couple’s bedroom was designed as a study.
Husbands and wives often shared the space to work together.
“The study is… in the outer keep.
There’s one in the main castle too, but it’s still being organized.
Not a good place for a pregnant woman.”
“……Ah.”
“If you want, I can have a separate space prepared for you in the outer keep.”
He was clearly too sleepy now, his words growing slower.
And then, as if to remind her, he said firmly,
“Don’t go outside the bedchamber.”
“……All right.
And thank you for the studio.
Now go to sleep.”
Harvich hesitated before asking,
“Do you like painting again now?”
“I never hated it in the first place.”
Harvich closed his eyes with a look of relief.
“I’m glad.”
Something about that relieved tone felt strange to her, and she fidgeted with her fingers.
He pressed his lips against the back of her hand.
The soft touch brushing her skin made her face flush.
“What—what are you doing?”
“Oh… it’s just so white and pretty…”
Half-asleep, he mumbled in a drowsy voice.
When she tried to pull her hand away, he held on tighter.
“……If I fall asleep, will you leave me?
Don’t go to that maid.
You might catch a cold.”
Hearing him repeat his sleepy ramblings, she couldn’t help but soften.
“I won’t get up right away, even if you fall asleep.
So sleep now.”
“……I can sleep just fine, even when you’re watching.”
When she gently brushed his hair, he closed his eyes.
He must have been exhausted, because he soon fell into steady breathing.
Even when she realized he had released her, Lincia didn’t move away from his arms.
She had the strange feeling that this tenderness would vanish the moment he opened his eyes.
***
When his breathing evened out, Lincia quietly slipped from his arms.
He stirred slightly, but closed his eyes again when she whispered for him to keep sleeping.
Standing by the bed, she turned toward the door that led to the room he had prepared as her studio.
The studio was something Harvich had always wanted to make for her.
The Grand Duchy, unlike the capital, had no cultural venues.
At best, there were small plays in the marketplace.
There were no exhibitions and no painters who came this far to work.
When a portrait artist once came to paint their couple’s portrait, Lincia had stared at him silently.
Harvich had asked quietly,
“Do you need a space to paint?”
“……No.”
She had refused.
She knew how costly it was to set up an art studio.
The paints she used were fine-quality materials available only in the capital.
The distance between the Grand Duchy and the Imperial Palace at the southern border was immense.
Even riding hard on horseback, it took a long journey to travel between them.
Paint was a consumable, quickly used up.
And Lincia had never once used old or dried paint.
Though the territory had enough supplies, she didn’t want to trouble anyone for her hobby.
Who would willingly go through such trouble for someone like her?
It felt like yet another reason for people to criticize her.
“Do you no longer enjoy painting?”
At first, she hadn’t been used to how indifferent Harvich was toward her.
His detached tone and expression whenever he mentioned her academy days had made her uneasy.
Every time he spoke that way, she was reminded that she was just extra baggage brought along with the supplies.
“I don’t like it anymore.
It’s been a long time.”
The studio she had once refused had now come to life before her eyes.
Harvich’s memory was as tenacious as ever.
He had surely recreated the studio exactly as she’d once imagined it.
She didn’t even need to see it to know.
But opening that door was another matter.
If she did, she felt she might foolishly forgive him.
She might even want to trust him again.
After hesitating for a long time, she finally grasped the doorknob.
And the moment she opened it, she felt as if she had stepped back into the past.
“Hey, Harvich.
If I ever get my own studio someday, I want it to face south.”
“……That’s the direction the sun rises.”
“Yeah.
I’ll put a wooden desk where the light hits just right, and fill the drawers with art supplies.
Of course, sunlight can damage paintings, so I’ll need a separate storage space too…”
“Is that all you want?”
“Hmm… I also want to collect a few music boxes.”
“Music boxes?”
“Yeah.
I’ll play them under the sunlight while I paint.
Just thinking about it makes me happy.”
Harvich had never once forgotten her wish.
And that made her heart ache terribly.
