Chapter 40
Harvich angrily thrust his pen into the inkwell, and the bottle toppled, spilling liquid across the desk.
“Wouldn’t it be proper to plan the compensation and funeral schedule first?”
“…Usually Ethan was in charge of such matters and he’s been busy; he couldn’t attend to it, and because so many supplies came in for this banquet, managing that took priority, so it would be best if Your Grace informed the Sebiang family that the schedule has been delayed.”
Something about the paperwork felt off.
Harvich thought that as he examined the documents.
Seeing the papers dumped on him that early evening, he couldn’t hide the thought.
He tried to look up last year’s compensation records, but meticulous Ethan had left no trace of anything.
Even records from two years prior were complete.
Because of that, Harvich had to spend the whole day sorting through files.
Normally he’d been well acquainted with compensation matters, but lately his headaches had worsened and his memory failed him.
He pressed his temple by habit and took a pill.
But even after the headache eased, his inability to focus remained.
He kept recalling his last conversation with Lincia.
“I’ll never forgive you.”
Every time he remembered that declaration, a part of him ached.
He couldn’t bring himself to face her, so he had gone to see Lincia each night.
He cut his sleep short to move while even the servants had not yet stirred.
She fell asleep weeping every night, her eyelids perpetually red; Harvich would watch her and then turn away.
It had already been a week.
Still, he lacked the courage to speak with Lincia.
He didn’t know where to begin or how to apologize.
He was at fault for breaking his promises, and many other things besides.
Yet Harvich couldn’t empathize with the core reason she was angry.
“It’s your child! You said it was yours! Why won’t you believe me?”
Harvich truly could not recall any memory related to that night.
He’d heard that banging your head might bring memories back.
He’d tried smashing his head against the wall several times, but nothing—no clue, no thread—returned about that night.
He wanted to believe Lincia, but without even fragments of memory, he could not; he felt nothing but frustration with himself.
If such a night had truly occurred, he would not have forgotten it; he was certain of that, and so he could not play along with a lie.
“…”
Harvich rose from the late-evening meeting.
As always, there was much to do and many unresolved tasks, but he felt that unless he saw Lincia’s face, he couldn’t focus on any of it.
On his way to her, he hoped she would not cry today.
The wood door creaked as it opened.
But the bed where the woman should have been lying was empty.
***
The castle bell that only rang when something serious happened echoed wildly.
In the dead of night when everyone should have been asleep, the bell summoned all the duchy’s people to the parade ground.
“My wife has disappeared.
Captains, form search parties immediately and investigate the areas around the duchy castle.”
Hue also rushed out to the parade ground.
…Her escape had been discovered far sooner than expected.
Hue’s brow creased.
In fact, the plan had accounted for being discovered within a week, but he had not expected Harvich to organize search parties in a single day.
Hue had assumed that even if Harvich learned of her absence, he would not search.
He expected that even with tender feelings for the woman, Harvich would maintain some measure of judgment.
Shouldn’t he be grateful that the woman—who was the most useless presence in the duchy—had been removed without their intervention?
But the man was slowly unraveling under the sway of love.
Hue hurried to find Harvich; the captain of the knights was already in Harvich’s study.
“Have the first squad search the routes toward the capital and the second squad the routes toward the Rensier kingdom.”
Harvich paid Hue no heed even when Hue arrived.
“Go out now. If you find any trace of my wife, fire the signal or send a messenger immediately.”
He gave the order briefly and dismissed the captains with a gesture.
The man who had stayed up all night had bloodshot eyes.
Hue bit his lip and spoke cautiously to Harvich.
“It’s dangerous to send search parties at this hour; everyone’s exhausted from the hunting festival—”
“Shut up. Once the snow starts, it’s harder to find her. We must search immediately.”
Harvich pressed his temple and stared at Hue.
“Why are you searching for the woman?”
“She is not merely a woman; she is the Grand Duchess. Do you need another reason to find your wife?”
Hue felt an odd estrangement from his lord.
Were men in love always like this?
Hue was dumbfounded by the reckless orders.
“It’s the hunting festival, sir; you’re confusing priorities!
You never even had a wedding, and now you’re searching for a woman who contributes nothing to the duchy—”
Hue cut off his protest when Harvich’s gaze turned icily upon him; he felt the silent pressure and fell silent.
“…The search is unnecessary. I helped that woman run away. She wanted to escape with the man she claimed fathered her child, so I granted her that request.”
Harvich could not find the right words in response; he pressed his lips together and stroked his face with one hand.
“You let the Grand Duchess escape without asking me, because she is of no use to the duchy.”
“…”
“And with another man.”
Harvich rose from his seat and strode past Hue, heading to his private chamber.
As he walked the duchy castle corridors, savage thoughts churned in his head.
Perhaps it would be best to find them first, kill the child’s father, and take his place.
Then those damned retainers couldn’t raise any objection.
No—what Harvich wanted was to be angry.
Hadn’t he already tried to do what needed doing for the duchy?
He had prepared for independence, but they had squandered every opportunity.
They demanded responsibility from him yet would not follow him.
Faced with the retainers’ constant defiance and disarray, Harvich felt stunned.
He had offered to bear the consequences for mistakes not of his own, had he not?
Long deprived of proper sleep, his reason had turned ruddy and foggy.
Lincia had run off with the child’s father.
Had she done it because she couldn’t be deceived by him and thus could not carry out Julius’s orders, so she gave up everything and fled with the father?
“Damn it.”
The one he most wanted to be deceived by was none other than himself.
He would rather it had been him who spent the night with Lincia.
There had been many nights he longed to whisper to a woman and make love.
He had restrained that impulse for reasons that now seemed meaningless.
Ah, what does any of it matter now.
I want to give it all up.
Thank you very much 🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺