WARDV 29

CHAPTER 29

“Even if I’ve grown up so much, even if you can no longer recognize me, I thought it would be okay… because I would still recognize you.”

But the more the memories faded, the more that certainty dimmed as well.

What if I completely forget your face like this?

What if we pass by each other on the street and don’t even recognize one another?

What if we end up remaining nothing more than strangers, forever?

What will I do then, having spent my whole life yearning only for you?

What if I can’t even remember the face I longed for?

Now… I was a little afraid.

Suppressing the sudden surge of emotion, Idris belatedly became aware of the butler and Heather’s presence and turned around.

“I’m going to look around a bit more. You go on ahead.”

After the butler and Heather left, Idris remained alone, wandering the still-empty greenhouse.

Once spring arrives and the flowers bloom, this place will be filled with vibrant colors.

Then, naturally, the butterflies will come too.

“…I wish I could show you.”

He often wondered, when will the one he’s waiting for finally get to see it?

While anticipating that day, he sometimes had thoughts like:

‘What if I can’t find you… because you don’t want to meet me?’

Could this endless search for you… just be my selfish desire?

Pondering that unanswerable question, Idris wandered for a while, then looked up at the overcast sky and stepped out of the greenhouse.

But as soon as he took a few steps, thick raindrops began to fall on his cheeks.

“……”

He could go back to the greenhouse and wait — the butler would surely come with an umbrella — but he didn’t feel like avoiding the rain.

Idris began walking slowly toward the mansion.

When he was about halfway there, a shadow suddenly fell over his head.

It was Leticia, holding an umbrella.

She looked like she had just returned from being out.

Only then did Idris remember what expression he might be wearing. He quickly masked it with a smile.

“Why aren’t you going straight to your room? It’s raining.”

“How could I, when my lover’s getting rained on alone? If I hadn’t seen you, maybe. But seeing you and still walking past? That’d be strange.”

“Hm, true enough.”

Leticia approached and held the umbrella over him.

“Don’t get soaked. I don’t like bald men.”

Idris let out a short laugh — this time, with sincerity.

He let himself be guided in the direction of the corridor she was leading him toward.

As they neared the corridor, Leticia — who hadn’t asked anything until now — suddenly spoke.

“Did something happen?”

She wasn’t looking at him but ahead, and her tone was as casual as if she were talking about the weather.

She didn’t want to pressure him.

Idris hesitated for a moment but answered out of habit.

“No, nothing.”

Hiding his emotions had long been a habit of his.

Everything he liked was destroyed by the Empress and Deon. And the things he hated became his weaknesses.

That’s why, until the Empress died, he never looked for Aria.

He didn’t want the girl who’d been dragged into his selfishness to be in danger.

But even after the Empress died, the habit lingered.

Even though he was no longer a powerless child.

While Idris was lost in thought, their footsteps stopped — they’d arrived at the corridor.

“You’ll catch a cold. Go wash up quickly,” Leticia said, closing the umbrella and turning around.

At that moment, watching her, Idris parted his lips slightly.

“…Leticia.”

She turned back with a puzzled look.

It was an impulsive action, one Idris hadn’t even realized himself. He hesitated, even though he was the one who called her.

Still, for some reason, it felt like it would be okay to tell her.

Maybe because he had seen the wounds she didn’t want anyone to notice too — and he felt she wouldn’t use his against him.

Or maybe…

‘Because she resembles Aria.’

Then, Idris spoke words he had never told anyone before.

“When we were young… if a friend who hurt you came looking for you, how do you think you’d feel?”

It was vague, and she might not catch the meaning behind it — but he felt nervous anyway.

Then he silently scolded himself.

‘Leticia isn’t Aria.’

So her answer wouldn’t be Aria’s answer.

“Hm, well…”

Leticia paused to think.

“Of course I’d be mad. And resentful. After all this time, why now?”

At that, Idris’s eyes noticeably wavered.

“But still,” she continued, “a part of me would probably be glad to see them.”

“…Even if they hurt you?”

“Sure, there’d be painful memories… but that doesn’t erase the good ones, right?”

“……”

“So if they apologized sincerely, and truly asked for forgiveness… maybe I could forgive them.”

Idris knew her words were probably just what he wanted to hear.

And, of course, it wasn’t Aria’s answer.

But strangely, the tension eased, and a small laugh escaped him.

“Thank you.”

At his gratitude, Leticia shrugged playfully with a mischievous smile.

As Idris watched her, the rain gradually began to subside.

By the time I returned to my room, the rain had stopped completely.

Just in case, I looked out the window at the corridor — thankfully, it seemed Idris had gone back into the main building.

‘He was… different today.’

Fear. Sadness. Longing…

I never knew that man, who always wore a smile that hid his thoughts, could feel such things.

That unfamiliar, awkward side of him — I couldn’t turn away from it.

Because it reminded me of myself, grieving over a lost childhood friend.

Maybe that’s why…

I turned back on impulse, unable to walk past him.

Because, standing in the rain, he looked like he was crying.

Just like I had, back then.

And once the memory came back, it poured out like a broken dam.

Not just the happy ones — even the ones I had buried deep because they hurt too much.

‘…Stop.’

The past surged painfully through my mind, and I squeezed my eyes shut, as if to block it out.

Just then, Erin came in with a knock.

“Young Lady, your bath is ready. Shall we go?”

“Yeah… Thank you.”

As if running away from those memories, I followed Erin to the bath.

In front of a shabby house in a slum.

Hands too small to be mine knocked on the door, acting on their own.

And at that moment, I realized:

‘…It’s a dream.’

And sure enough, as if to confirm that, my voice came out — unbidden, not my own.

“Are you inside?”

The house looked like it would collapse any second, not fit for anyone to live in. But I knew a child lived here.

‘This isn’t just any dream. It’s a memory from when I was ten.’

Just as my younger self raised a hand to knock again—

A boy’s voice came from inside.

“…Why are you here?”

Small, but laced with anger.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m really late, huh? I tried to come sooner, but—”

“No need to apologize. I wasn’t waiting.”

“But…!”

BANG!

A loud thud shook the door.

As if something had been thrown from the other side.

“Get lost! Don’t ever come here again!”

The me in the dream flinched.

My younger self said something, but I couldn’t hear what — like the sound had been muted.

‘Maybe because the memory’s too fuzzy.’

No more sounds came from behind the door, but I clearly remembered — he’d shouted something in anger then.

And what would happen next.

The younger me rubbed at tearful eyes and turned away.

‘No, don’t go…!’

I wanted to stay rooted in place, but dream-me turned away without hesitation.

Then — blackout.

It was only a moment, but I could feel that a day had passed in the dream.

The child-me stood once again in front of that same house.

Hesitantly, I raised my hand to knock — and the door creaked open on its own.

And through the open crack…

I saw shattered furniture.

And vivid bloodstains.