Episode 3
“Lope, I can’t betray my lord.”
Asterophe had heard those words many times in her past life.
Dozens of times, in fact.
Convincing the upright and loyal Kallian had never been easy.
But when he was about to lose her, Kallian finally drew his sword.
Only for her.
Asterophe thought she should have realized it back then.
Not the throne, but her was the reason he moved.
Crown Prince Billish was different.
He wanted the throne, not her.
The man who truly loved her was the Grand Duke standing right in front of her.
But she had been completely blinded by love and couldn’t see it.
This time, Asterophe decided to speak harshly from the start.
Her desire for revenge was burning like an erupting volcano.
“What if Crown Prince Billish tries to take me away?”
Kallian’s expression hardened instantly.
This wasn’t just a slight frown or discomfort.
It was pure anger.
“You are my wife and the Grand Duchess. No matter who he is, even if he is the next emperor, he cannot take you from me.”
His voice was firm.
He had no intention of backing down.
“Then promise me one thing.”
“What is it?”
“If Crown Prince Billish tries to take me from you, promise you won’t hesitate and will cut him down.”
“Why? Can’t you promise?”
Asterophe pressed him hard.
Kallian felt awkward seeing her like this, but answering her request was even harder.
“Does that mean you don’t love me enough?”
“No. That’s not it.”
“Then why can’t you say it?”
“Lope.”
“Promise me. My life depends on it.”
It was the truth.
Without Kallian, Asterophe’s life was as fragile as a fly’s.
As long as Kallian lived, Billish couldn’t touch her easily.
Billish had weak arms and legs and would run away the moment he faced a battlefield.
Why had she ever loved such a man?
She didn’t understand it anymore, yet her chest still hurt.
Her world had once been filled with nothing but Billish.
Kallian thought she was angry and looked helpless, his lips trembling as he tried to speak.
“I can’t make that promise. If… if you say you want to go to Crown Prince Billish, then I shouldn’t stop you.”
“Why not?”
“Lope…?”
“You’re my husband. You have the right to stop me. And I have no intention of going to Billish on my own.”
“…Because I don’t want to die again.”
“Die again? What do you mean?”
“I—I misspoke.”
Only then did Asterophe realize what she had said.
Her throat went dry.
She snatched the glass from Kallian’s hand and drank it in one gulp.
“Cough—!”
“Lope, that’s strong alcohol.”
“It’s fine. It doesn’t taste that bad.”
“What on earth happened to you? You really seem like a different person.”
Kallian looked at her with genuine worry.
And it made sense.
For the past year, his wife had lived like a fairy surviving on dew.
Now she was eating like a starving beggar, asking him to kill the Crown Prince, and gulping down ouzo.
Everything about her was strange.
Asterophe admitted to herself that she was rushing things.
But she would no longer live behind a mask.
What hurt her the most when she died was that she had never lived as herself.
“Do you hate me like this?”
“Do you hate that I talk recklessly, eat greedily, and ask you to kill someone?”
“No.”
Kallian answered firmly.
Just like when he swung his sword.
“Lope, you are my wife. No matter what kind of person you are, I can’t help but love you. That’s already decided.”
Kallian didn’t want to lose the only family he had ever had.
He wanted to protect her.
Love her.
Hold her.
That was all.
His love had begun as a sense of duty, but over time, it became real emotion.
She was the only woman with whom he could lay down his weapons and speak freely.
Asterophe looked into the honest man’s eyes.
There wasn’t a single lie in them.
He loved her because she was his wife.
In her past life, he had been the same.
He had given up everything and taken the throne for her.
He lost precious knights and suffered deeply.
But he never regretted it.
“Regret? Of course not. I’m your husband. I must do anything to protect you. So don’t think like that, Lope. My empress.”
He had said that before drinking the poisoned liquor.
Back then, his eyes had looked slightly sad.
Was that just her imagination?
It was as if he already knew the drink was poisoned.
She wanted to believe it was a misunderstanding, but the way he stared at the cup for so long was burned into her memory.
He had known.
And he drank it anyway.
Because he loved her.
Kallian Onyx was that kind of man.
Asterophe felt tears coming and stood up.
“Alright, Kallian.”
“I’ll truly live as your wife from now on. I’ll show you everything without lies. Even if you hate this side of me, you can’t undo the marriage anymore. You already swore.”
At her words, Kallian lifted the corner of his lips slightly.
“Of course.”
Asterophe staggered.
The alcohol was too strong.
Kallian caught her.
The feel of his solid arm around her slim waist almost made her cry again.
She remembered his cold body as he died.
She remembered whispering to herself while touching his frozen face, tears falling.
Only then had she realized that Billish had never given her devotion like this.
Never given her love like this.
“Maybe… maybe I liked you. I’m sorry. Goodbye.”
After those words, everything collapsed.
Chester had pointed his sword at her when the Grand Duke died, but he was soon killed by Billish’s invading forces.
She herself was bound soon after.
The memories were so horrible that tears finally fell.
“Lope, why are you crying?”
Kallian, who knew nothing, panicked and tried to comfort her.
His large, rough hand wiped away her tears, and Asterophe simply buried herself in his arms.
They had been married for one year.
They had only shared formal nights.
No comfortable intimacy.
Asterophe had always avoided it out of embarrassment.
Even hugs like this had been rare, so Kallian must have been confused.
But Asterophe remembered his warmth.
His careful kisses.
She hugged him tightly.
After hesitating for a moment, Kallian awkwardly hugged her back.
“Lope… what happened to you? Tell me. No matter who it is, I won’t let them get away with it.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t say that. You don’t have to tell me right now.”
“No. I really am sorry, Kallian.”
“Lope.”
“I will never betray you again.”
She said it like a vow and held him tightly.
The burning fire inside her finally began to calm.
Kallian stroked her hair and kissed her head softly.
“Don’t worry about anything, Lope.”
“Even if you betray me, I will still protect you.”
Tears overflowed again.
Yes.
He was the man who chose death for her, even when she betrayed him.
Even when she poisoned his drink.
‘Why didn’t I love you? Why did I kill you?’
Asterophe cried with regret.
This life would be different.
She would kill Crown Prince Billish with her own hands.
Holding Kallian tightly, she made that promise.
The embrace lasted a long time.
When morning came, Asterophe opened her eyes and opened the window.
The snowstorm that had lasted for days had stopped.
People were finally walking outside again.
“Your Grace, I brought water for you to wash.”
“Mm. What’s your name?”
“My name is Anne.”
“Anne. I’ll wash by myself today. Go check the Grand Duke’s schedule with the butler.”
“Pardon? Are you sure? You never wash yourself, Your Grace…”
That was true.
Asterophe had lived without lifting a finger, always moved by maids.
But in prison, she couldn’t wash at all.
She had scratched her body raw.
She had saved drinking water to clean only itchy spots.
Warm water now felt like a luxury.
“It’s fine. Go check his schedule.”
“Yes, Your Grace.”
Anne left without arguing.
Asterophe looked at her reflection in the warm water.
White skin.
Black hair.
Red lips.
Large eyes.
The beautiful woman she remembered.
Three years later, she would be nothing but skin and bones, covered in grime.
Her hair would be thin and tangled from malnutrition.
She had spent winters wearing torn muslin rags even commoners discarded.
Her hands and feet had cracked and bled.
Asterophe looked down at her hands.
Smooth.
Soft.
Still unfamiliar, even after a week.
She slowly dipped her fingers into the water.
Warm.
Clean.
Just like Kallian Onyx’s feelings for her.
She bit her lip to stop herself from crying again.
Then she thought of Billish Numa.
No matter what, the man she must kill in this life.
Her former lover.
