Chapter 34
He knew it in his head — that he should push Diane away.
But once again, Nathan couldn’t do it.
His foolish arms didn’t push her off — they wrapped around her even tighter.
“Is this… also another action that’s inappropriate for my status?”
“Diane.”
Hearing Nathan’s flustered voice, Diane drew in a deep breath and slowly exhaled to steady herself.
“My life has always been a series of resignation and giving up. You’re right. I’m just like you. I ran away because I didn’t have the courage to face rejection. But… Elaina told me this — if there’s something left unsaid, say it all, so you don’t live with regrets.”
As Diane recalled those words, a thought suddenly struck her.
If she gave up again, the way she always had… how much would her future self — ten, twenty, thirty years later — regret this moment?
Once she returned home, all that awaited her was departure for the convent.
She should return — she would have, under normal circumstances.
But her lingering feelings for Nathan were too strong, and so she couldn’t make herself go down the stairs. She stood frozen halfway, unable to move either way.
Crying would change nothing.
Running away would change nothing either.
Only action could change something.
Just as Elaina’s courage had changed her, Diane hoped her own courage might change Nathan. She pressed every word she spoke with all the sincerity she had.
“Can you honestly say you won’t regret this? I can’t.
I’ll regret not talking a little longer, not persuading you harder, not shouting at you to stop lying.
I’ll regret not being more stubborn.
Even as I walked down the tower stairs, all I could feel was regret.”
“…Ha.”
Nathan pressed his throbbing forehead and spoke in a rough, broken voice.
“Your father… ten years ago, he led the charge to suppress Grand Duke Grant’s rebellion. That’s how a mere baron rose to marquess in one leap. A man like that would never approve of me.”
But Diane quietly shook her head.
“That’s not what I’m asking. It doesn’t matter whether I’m a marquess’s daughter or not.
I’m asking if you can live today without regret.”
A question whose answer was already obvious.
Even without Diane’s words, Nathan already knew his life from this day forward would be filled with regret.
He had fallen for her long ago, through years of exchanged letters — and even more so that night they met in the dark garden.
She must have been startled by the stranger before her, yet she handed him her handkerchief and tended to his injured hand with such kindness… and from that moment, she had captured his heart.
And now, that very woman stood before him, asking if he could live without regret.
Not answering was, in its own way, an answer.
Diane gently took his hand. Nathan flinched, but their eyes met.
“Let’s be brave, just a little.
Let’s do everything we can — so that we won’t have any regrets.
When we look back on this day years from now, let’s not have any lingering sorrow.”
The determination in Diane’s eyes matched the firmness of the hand that held his.
Even the cowardly Nathan Hennet could feel courage stirring within him at that sight.
***
Down at the base of the tower, Elaina sat on a bench, waiting for Diane.
At last, she couldn’t stand it any longer and jumped to her feet.
It was taking too long. Far too long.
Just as she was about to march up the tower herself, the door opened, and Diane appeared.
“Diane!”
Elaina ran to her. When she saw the tear stains on Diane’s cheeks, her face filled with concern.
“Are you all right? What on earth were you talking about for so long?”
Diane smiled faintly, her eyes swollen and red. Elaina’s eyes widened in alarm.
“Don’t tell me — it didn’t go well again? Oh, for heaven’s sake, what a hopeless man! Diane, Nathan Hennet loves you! He’s just a terrible coward, that’s all! Wait here, I’ll go up and talk some sense into him—”
But Diane grabbed her arm and shook her head.
“It went well.”
“But your eyes—”
“I’ll tell you on the way, Elaina.”
Her cheeks were flushed, and her swollen eyes curved into half-moons as she smiled.
In the carriage, Elaina impatiently urged Diane to tell her everything.
She could already guess from Diane’s expression that things had gone well — but she wanted to hear the words herself.
“Just like you said, Elaina, I told him everything I’d kept inside.”
When Diane said she’d poured out all her pent-up resentment, Elaina looked genuinely moved.
“Good for you! That’s exactly what you should’ve done.
If it were me, I might’ve even slapped him! You didn’t do anything wrong, Diane — not one bit.”
“Thank you. It’s all because of you, Elaina.”
Diane smiled with heartfelt gratitude. Elaina scratched her head, embarrassed.
“Oh, come on, I didn’t do much.”
“If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have come here. I wouldn’t have said what I needed to say to Nathan.”
Elaina, flustered by her sincerity, hurriedly changed the subject.
“Anyway, enough about me — tell me what happened next! So? What’s going to happen now?”
Pressed for details, Diane blushed lightly.
“He said he’ll visit the marquess’s estate soon.
To formally propose to me.”
“Kyaaaah!”
Elaina shrieked and threw her arms around Diane, forgetting they were inside a moving carriage.
They almost toppled over, but neither of them cared.
Elaina’s pure joy for her friend made Diane smile brightly too.
But soon, a shadow passed over her face.
“What if Father opposes it strongly?”
Convincing Nathan had been hard enough.
But Diane knew that convincing her father would be even harder — and she wasn’t sure she could.
Still, the uncertainty in her eyes was soon replaced by a spark of resolve.
“Then…”
“Then what?”
“Then I’ll just run away.”
It was such a bold declaration that Elaina’s eyes went round as saucers.
“Are you serious?”
Diane nodded firmly.
“Yes. I mean it. If Father refuses to accept it, then I’ll run away with Nathan.”
She spoke with newfound determination — saying that once they married quietly in a small country church, even her father wouldn’t be able to send her to a convent.
Elaina could only blink, dumbfounded.
Was this really the same Diane she knew?
“Elaina, what’s wrong?”
“N-no, it’s just… I never thought I’d see this side of you, Diane.”
Diane’s cheeks turned rosy.
“Don’t say that. You know whose fault this is, right?”
“Wait — you mean mine?”
“Of course!”
Elaina was like a stone cast into the still lake of Diane’s life — the ripples had spread wide, until they became waves.
Diane took a deep breath.
“It feels… strange, really.”
Defying her family — especially her father — had never been easy for Diane.
Since childhood, she’d been treated more as property of the household than as a person.
She’d always thought of herself as a burden, grateful simply not to be cast out.
She believed obedience was her duty, and that her father had every right to control her life.
After all, that’s how she’d always lived.
But now… she realized it wasn’t such a terrifying thing after all.
The world didn’t end. The wind felt cool. Her heart was racing.
And in front of her was a friend who was truly happy for her.
Ah.
So this is what it felt like to finally break free.
“You said it’s all because of me, huh?
Then I guess I have no choice but to take responsibility!”
Elaina clenched her fist as she spoke.
Puzzled, Diane tilted her head.
“Take responsibility? For what?”
“For your wedding, of course! Marriage is the most important moment in life.
Running away to get married in secret because of your father — I can’t allow that!
You, Diane, will have a proper wedding — grand, joyous, celebrated by everyone! You’ll be the happiest bride anyone’s ever seen. Just watch me.”
Elaina’s eyes shone with fierce determination.
Diane thought of saying that such a thing was impossible — but decided to hold her tongue, just for now.
But Elaina was not the kind of person to make empty promises.
A few days after returning from the academy, unbelievable things began to happen around Diane.
