Revised Version 10 (A recollection, two months later)
The first time I went to the temple at Ren’s invitation, he welcomed me inside.
It wasn’t the main hall itself, but another building on the temple grounds, built in a style similar to a main hall. He invited me into that separate residence.
It seemed to have several rooms, some with wide wooden floors, others with tatami mats.
“Welcome. I’m glad you came.”
“Did you think I would?”
“Well… who knows. But I thought if you did come, it would surely bring me joy.”
“Haah… from the woman who was sobbing and screaming the other day?”
“Haha, the fact that you can look at yourself so objectively is reassuring.”
“Please forgive me for showing you such an unsightly side of myself the other day.
And, like a child, I trespassed and used that old pipe lying on temple grounds… I feel deeply ashamed of my behavior.”
“So then? Are you ready to tell me today why you were so distraught?”
“I’m afraid not. If I try to explain, it’ll become long and incoherent. I’m scared to even start.”
“Could you tell me in simple terms, then?”
“My husband has been sending erotic LINE messages to other women.”
“I see. Then let me recite a sutra for you. While I do, sit beside me and, in rhythm with my chant, repeat this line:
‘Husband, stop sending LINE messages to other women. I will not forgive you.’
Alright? Let’s begin.”
Ren turned his back to me and began chanting a real Buddhist sutra.
Meanwhile, I recited the words he had given me—and I found myself really liking them.
It must have gone on for at least ten minutes…
At some point, I changed the words slightly:
‘Eiji Higuchi, stop sending LINE messages to other women. I will not forgive you—idiot!’
When the chanting ended, I remember my chest felt so light, so free.
That refreshing feeling was like a drug to me—like a slow, spreading balm I couldn’t forget.
From that moment on, I kept going back to see Ren.
And on the way home, I always stopped by the spot where the big pipe was.
By then, the camphor tree already had reddish winter buds.
