Chapter 65 …
“…This isn’t a small gift at all.”
Seidin bit his lower lip hard. He knew it would be better not to, but his lips were painfully dry and cracked. Whenever he got nervous, his lips would dry out and his tongue would stick to the roof of his mouth. This had been happening ever since he reunited with Luan.
He hadn’t understood it before, but now he did.
It was because he liked Luan and wanted to get her attention, but hated the situation in which he couldn’t fully do so.
But now, he could express his feelings toward Luan. So Seidin spun around quickly toward her after Luan, standing behind him, unclasped the necklace. Perhaps because Seidin had taken the initiative to approach her, Luan was actually surprised that he would so casually close the distance.
Then, holding the delicately cut diamond necklace firmly and without hesitation, he spoke:
“Princess?”
“…Thank you.”
Seidin pressed down on the excitement rising in his chest and spoke. He wanted to sound as nonchalant as possible.
“This is the first time I’ve received a gift like this from my lover.”
“……”
Luan’s thick eyebrows twitched. Seeing only her eyebrows move without any other expression, Seidin’s eyes went wide. Even after courageously expressing his honest feelings to the person he liked, Luan’s lack of expression wasn’t disappointing.
Instead, he blamed himself.
Perhaps it was the side effect of never expressing himself before, always saying nonsensical things like, “No! We’re just friends!” That Luan didn’t understand his feelings.
Seidin clenched his fists harder to express more of his heart. Then he slowly lifted his arm. Doing his best not to look awkward, he placed his hand over Luan’s.
“I’m serious. I may have been clumsy in expressing my feelings, and I’ve never honestly told Your Majesty what I felt… but I wanted to say this. The necklace is very beautiful.”
“Princess.”
“Yes?”
“This little necklace… I could give you hundreds more.”
“That’s not to say I want to receive them often. I just…”
Her usually cool, violet eyes were now like an active volcano, simmering intensely.
Clack.
Seidin could tell how tightly he was gripping the necklace; it looked like he could crush even the solid diamond. Not knowing how his honest words had affected Luan, Seidin hurriedly continued.
He just wanted to distract him with a lighthearted remark.
“You understand what I mean, right? Since you’re my boyfriend…”
“……”
“When we met again, Your Majesty said the term ‘boyfriend’ was cute. Now I can call you that to my heart’s content.”
“Huuuh.”
Luan let out a deep sigh, then frowned slightly at the princess smiling up at him. What to do with such a small, pretty person—he didn’t know. Her pale lips chattered as usual, and her silver eyes sparkled with a resolve he couldn’t even imagine.
Everything about her was cute, endearing.
Luan’s gaze swept over her elegant nape and the subtly shimmering apricot-colored dress. The form-fitting dress accentuated Seidin’s slender waist and long legs.
And…
As he admired the princess from every angle, Luan’s eyes twitched slightly. At the same time, he felt a surge of resistance toward the maids who had dressed her so beautifully.
She was far too beautiful.
Beautiful enough for anyone to notice.
Finally, Luan exhaled a long-held breath.
“Huuuh…”
“Your Majesty? Why… why are you like this?”
“When my lover is too beautiful, it makes my chest feel tight.”
“T-That’s… not something one should say.”
Seidin had never heard such a compliment before.
It was all the effect of a first love.
When Seidin tried to wave his hands and change the subject, Luan persisted:
“The princess being beautiful only in my eyes is enough.”
“…Only you see it that way, idiot.”
Seidin, who had been fumbling to get Luan’s attention, finally closed his lips. For some reason, Luan’s gaze was getting hotter, and Seidin blinked rapidly to keep from being mesmerized. His mouth dried out when nervous, and now his eyes felt a bit parched too.
Ugh. Shows I’m a first love.
Seidin scolded himself and sighed, just like Luan. Then Luan casually placed the diamond necklace on the table. Taking purposeful steps, he closed the distance between them. When they were so close their breaths mingled, Luan reached out and pulled Seidin’s hand, naturally entwining it around his own waist.
“If you dislike it, I won’t show unease. You can continue being beautiful. It’s just my own narrow-mindedness.”
Gasp!
Seidin was pulled into Luan’s embrace, blinking. Luan seemed gentle but capable, doing as he pleased. Even before becoming lovers, Luan had pulled her into his chest without hesitation, and Seidin teased him.
Pressing one cheek against his broad chest, her ears flushed red.
“As expected of Your Majesty. Even lying, you make it sound like the truth.”
“Me, lying?”
“It’s flattering, but you speak as if I’m the world’s most beautiful woman. I have high standards for others, but also for myself.”
Seidin continued, half teasing the already alluring Luan pressed against her.
“In terms of beauty, you can’t compare to Your Majesty’s face.”
“……”
“Ah. Should I say Your Majesty is handsome?”
She smiled slightly. Luan smelled wonderful—like walking through a refreshing forest…
In the end, pressing her cheek against his chest as he wished, Seidin murmured:
“Luan, you can keep being handsome too.”
“……”
“Can I speak casually sometimes, like before? When it’s just us?”
Seidin mustered courage, lifting his chin, and rubbed his chin against the diamond necklace on Luan’s chest.
“You can speak casually too.”
Looking at Seidin’s clear eyes, Luan chuckled softly. He was too cute and endearing; she felt she shouldn’t even laugh properly. After years of forced smiles, he didn’t even know how to truly smile.
So she decided to learn.
By watching Seidin, by embracing him.
“No.”
“……?”
She furrowed her brows—she didn’t understand. Seeing her serious frown, Luan smiled slyly and pressed her thumb against it like a stamp.
“You can only do that after officially becoming Seidin Herace’s wife.”
“……”
“Isn’t that right?”
Taken aback by her soft, unexpected words, Seidin pouted, then buried his face in Luan’s chest, unable to respond further. At that moment, Luan hugged her tightly.
Unconsciously, Seidin’s long-suppressed impulses surged.
Ugh.
Holding back as if restraining divine power gnawing inside him, Luan turned his head.
At an inopportune moment, the dreaded hallucinations echoed in his ears.
[Bastard. Die.]
[You monster, struggling in vain.]
[Die. Die!]
The mocking voices were all familiar. Even though he had slaughtered those who had cursed and hated him, the hallucinations denied that fact.
For the first time, Luan’s large hands trembled while holding Seidin. He had killed all the haters and found peace, yet still…
An inexplicable anxiety flared in his chest.
Luan knew what it was. It was the madness of brothers and fathers who had long since gone insane and powerless.
And the madness he thought he knew well would strike him harder than anyone else.
In the form of anxiety that devours everything.
Damn it.
Luan exhaled sharply.
Then Seidin spoke carefully. Fortunately, Luan hadn’t fully processed the situation, still pressing her face to his chest, listening to her heartbeat.
“Luan. Your heartbeat is strong.”
“…Because I’m holding the princess.”
He smiled faintly, then lifted her slightly off his shoulder, gently kissing her cheek and whispering:
“By the way, Princess. Are you planning to rescue the poor familiar you hid in the temple?”
He had said it to divert Seidin’s over-attentive mind from her health.
And Luan’s prediction was correct. Momentarily dazed, she startled as if awakened from a dream.
“Ah! Right! My subordinate!”
