~Chapter 111~
Gasp. My heart almost dropped.
All the thoughts I had a moment ago vanished, leaving my mind blank.
I stared at him absentmindedly.
I always thought this, but Fabian truly had captivating features.
Above all, what drew my gaze again and again were his violet eyes—like they held an entire sky full of stars.
He claimed he couldn’t feel emotions, and yet, ironically, his eyes seemed to contain every emotion in the world.
Whenever I met those eyes, I felt an odd trembling deep inside me.
“……You’re especially unfocused today.”
As his face, which had come so close, drew back, it felt as though time began to flow again.
“Yes… I’ve just had a lot on my mind…”
I let out a shallow breath and stepped back.
It was true I hadn’t been able to concentrate, so I couldn’t make excuses.
“Can I take a short break?”
“…Rest for ten minutes.”
Fabian gave a small nod.
I sank onto a nearby chair meant for resting. And again, my thoughts rose to the surface.
The sudden letter that appeared—written in Korean.
Emily, who showed no signs of awakening even though her birthday had already passed.
‘…Something feels wrong.’
I thought I knew everything because I was a transmigrator, but the situation was becoming more and more incomprehensible.
It felt as though there was something about this novel I had completely overlooked.
“…So.”
When I turned my head, Fabian was watching me.
“After talking so long with that Holy Knight the other day… did it feel good?”
“…What?”
I blinked wide-eyed, tilting my face.
Fabian, arms crossed, looked at me silently, his brows twitching as if something about it annoyed him.
“You left for a long while during the party to talk with him.”
“That was because…”
There had been a reason.
‘I never expected Eric to find me crying like that.’
Still, it had turned into a good conversation. Thanks to Eric, my restless heart had settled.
But—
I suddenly felt flustered.
Was Fabian… actually talking about me being with another man?
His attitude felt unfamiliar. That look in his eyes, that slightly irritated tone.
Wasn’t it natural for me to step away for a bit? Why did he care so much about my talk with Eric?
“…Fabian. Don’t tell me—you’re jealous?”
At my words, Fabian’s brows twitched again, as if even more irritated.
His eyes deepened. For a moment, it looked like he was actually considering the meaning of the word “jealousy.”
Then he shook his head.
“No.”
“……”
“I just think it was rude for the main character of a birthday party to be gone for so long for personal reasons.”
“…Haha.”
I laughed, swallowing the rest of my words.
Fabian, let’s just call that jealousy.
Fabian strode heavily toward his office.
After Irene’s mana practice was over, fatigue hit him all at once. He hadn’t slept properly through the night.
He already thought of himself as sensitive, but never before had he felt this on edge.
What had filled his mind all night was none other than Irene Hartmann.
During the birthday party, at some point she had vanished and hadn’t returned for quite a while.
Where did Irene go?
The blonde lady who had returned with her glanced at Albert and replied:
[Ah, she’s talking with Sir Eric right now. Don’t worry, she’ll be back soon.]
From that moment on, Fabian hadn’t been able to focus on the party.
He had always been quiet, but now he was silent to the extreme, barely saying a word.
Why was that?
He had lived for hundreds of years, yet he had never experienced anything like this.
Someone occupied his thoughts so strongly… and yet he couldn’t show a trace of it.
[I wonder… Fabian, are you jealous?]
Irene’s words echoed in his mind.
Jealousy.
He knew jealousy was an emotion that lingered between humans just as often as love did.
But whether what he was feeling now was truly jealousy, he couldn’t be certain.
He had never felt it before—this unfamiliar sensation.
What he was certain about was that it was something deeply unpleasant.
Clack.
Closing the door behind him, Fabian sat at his desk, scowling.
Truly, he had been strange lately.
His nerves felt sharper, his senses keener toward everything around him.
He no longer needed whiskey or chocolate to heighten his senses; they were already too sharp.
So recently, he hadn’t been seeking them much. But today…
Today, he felt he needed whiskey. He wanted to calm his tangled thoughts.
He was just pulling a bottle and glass from the cabinet in the corner of his office when—
Knock knock.
“Lord Fabian.”
“…Come in.”
Fabian turned around. His subordinate entered, adjusting his glasses.
“About Lady Irene’s mana test last time. As you instructed, we ran a detailed analysis… and found something. I thought you should see it yourself.”
At that, Fabian frowned.
He set down the whiskey glass and stretched out his hand.
The subordinate came closer and handed over a paper filled with the analysis.
Fabian looked down at it, and his brows twitched.
Clatter, clatter.
The carriage rattled along the road.
After finishing mana practice, I was on my way back to the mansion. I quietly gazed out the window.
[After talking so long with that Holy Knight the other day… did it feel good?]
[You left for so long during the party to talk with him.]
Those were words I could hardly believe had come out of Fabian’s mouth.
Not only that—it was the first time I had ever seen him speak at such length.
[I just think it was rude for the main character of a birthday party to be gone for so long for personal reasons.]
I chuckled faintly. His excuse was so clumsy, it was almost cute.
Fabian, of all people… feeling jealous. Making excuses.
A man I once thought wouldn’t bleed a drop even if pricked with a needle.
‘Could Fabian really be starting to feel emotions?’
If those feelings had bloomed because of me, then it was something to be happy about.
But at the same time… it frightened me.
Because if my treatment failed—if I died in the end—
The smile faded from my face. I bit my lip, swallowing hard.
‘For now, I shouldn’t do anything to stir Fabian’s emotions further.’
Before he awakened to even more feelings, I decided to stop here.
No matter how I thought about it, it seemed best not to provoke him anymore.
‘…How ironic. I worked so hard to make him feel more emotions.’
And now, I was taking it all back.
‘I’m sorry, Fabian… but this really is for the best.’
With a sigh, I nodded to myself.
Flash!
A sudden light filled the carriage. I flinched and looked up at the ceiling.
Out of nowhere, a glow appeared in midair. From within it—pop!—the chick emerged.
[Saint, are you okay?]
“Eh?”
I tilted my head in confusion at the divine beast who had shown up in such a fuss.
“Why did you suddenly appear?”
[I was sleeping, but I woke up with a really bad feeling.]
Its expression was tense. Now that I looked closely, even its feathers were damp, as though it was sweating.
The chick hopped onto my shoulder, glaring warily out the window.
[Be careful. Something bad might happen…]
Boom!
With a deafening crash, the carriage shook violently.
