CHAPTER 36………………………………….
“Why.”
“She’s not interested in me. She’s just… doing her best because her family tells her to.”
His voice cracked. The whiskey in his glass trembled. Suho stared at Geonwoo for a long moment before speaking again.
“That’s exactly why you should say something.”
“…You think that’s easy?”
“It’s not. But if you don’t, you’ll never know.”
Geonwoo nodded silently. He set his glass down and slowly exhaled.
It was just past 11 p.m. Hana had turned off the lights and was about to lie down on the bed.
Click—
She heard the front door open. It seemed he had come home. Familiar footsteps moved down the hallway, drawing closer.
There was something oddly heavy in those steps.
Click—
Her bedroom door slowly opened. A faint light seeped in through the crack.
Geonwoo stood there. His tie was loosened, his face flushed with alcohol. His eyes were unfocused, yet there was a firm resolve in them, as if he were holding tightly to something.
“…Have you been drinking?”
Hana slowly pushed herself up and looked at him. Instead of answering, Geonwoo staggered into the room.
The door closed quietly behind him.
“…Hana.”
His voice was low, as though it had barely escaped after a long hesitation.
He looked at her for a moment before speaking slowly.
“Why are you so cold?”
Hana blinked.
“…What?”
“Why are you like that to me?”
His gaze wavered.
“What did I do so wrong?”
“Mr. Geonwoo….”
“Why aren’t you interested in me?”
There was a thick, suppressed emotion in his words. Hana shook her head in confusion.
“…What are you talking about? Out of nowhere.”
“I…”
He took a step closer. His breath smelled of alcohol.
“I like you.”
Hana froze. His eyes were too honest to feel like a lie.
“…What did you just say?”
Looking at her with unsteady eyes, he said,
“I like you. Seo Hana.”
“……”
“From the first time I saw you until now. I’ve liked you.”
Hana felt as though she couldn’t breathe. The sudden confession threw her thoughts into chaos.
There wasn’t a trace of falsehood in his words. That sincerity only confused her more.
“But you…”
His voice grew quieter.
“You don’t see me. You don’t care about me at all.”
“…You’re very drunk right now.”
Hana tried to calm him as gently as she could, but he didn’t stop. He stepped closer, and she instinctively moved back.
Her back hit the cold wall. There was nowhere left to retreat.
Geonwoo lifted his hand. His fingers gripped her shoulder—not harshly, but firmly enough that she couldn’t pull away.
“To you, am I just… a contract partner?”
Hana bit her lip. In his eyes, there was a loneliness deeper than the alcohol.
“Do you hate me that much?”
She lowered her head.
“…No, it’s not that….”
“Then what is the problem?”
His voice trembled.
“Why can’t it be me?”
At those words, Hana slowly lifted her head to look at him. A faint shimmer—whether tears or exhaustion—flickered in her eyes.
“…Why are you suddenly acting like this?”
“Suddenly?”
He let out a short, hollow laugh tinged with desperation.
“I’ve been by your side for over two years.”
“……”
“We’ve lived together. We’ve shared a bed so many times. And I’m still a stranger to you?”
“…Do you really like me?”
Her voice shook. Geonwoo paused.
“What?”
“If you like me, then why did you push me like that? Test me? Try to confirm it over and over?”
Her gaze hardened.
“Is that love?”
Geonwoo couldn’t answer. Hana raised her head, tears pooling in her eyes.
“Is that really what it means to like someone?”
His breathing grew rough. He said nothing. She finally voiced what she had held back.
“Even sleeping together… not once was it because I wanted to.”
Her voice trembled.
“You were always the one who started it. Even when you were rough, like I should just accept this much…!”
“……”
“Still, I always did what you wanted. I lay down on the bed without a word. Do you have any idea how humiliating that feels as a woman?”
All expression vanished from Geonwoo’s face. He stood there in silence.
And then—
“…I’m sorry.”
He said it in a small voice.
“Is that all it takes? Just ‘I’m sorry’?”
Hana’s voice shook.
“I’m a person too. I have feelings.”
“I know.”
“Then why… why do you do this to me? Why do you make it so hard?”
Hana slid down the wall and sat on the floor. Her shoulders trembled as tears spilled out.
Geonwoo watched her, then slowly knelt down. His gaze lowered to meet her eyes.
“Hana…”
His voice trembled.
“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”
She didn’t answer. She only looked at him with tear-filled eyes.
“I just… wanted you to see me.”
“……”
“Every time you looked at me with no emotion at all, I felt like I was going crazy. So I thought… if I did that, at least in those moments, maybe you’d look at me. That’s why.”
His eyes shook.
“I thought that was love. I thought I had to do that to have you.”
There was a pitiful sincerity in his voice.
“…Jung Geonwoo.”
Hana forced the words out. Her voice trembled, but it was firm.
“That’s not love.”
She coldly shook off the hand that had been gripping her.
“It’s obsession.”
“……”
Geonwoo said nothing. His eyes flickered faintly.
“I…”
“Yes.”
“I just want to live normally. Without being doubted, without being tested, without being crushed by someone else’s emotions. Just… normally.”
After she finished speaking, silence filled the room. Geonwoo bit his lip hard, as if swallowing something down.
“…I’ll do that.”
“Can you promise?”
Hana looked at him. There was no expectation or trust in her eyes—only fatigue and resignation.
“…I promise.”
But she said nothing. Tears still lingered at the corners of her eyes, and her expression carried an old surrender.
“…For tonight, just go to sleep.”
Hana spoke softly.
“You’re very drunk.”
Geonwoo stood there for a long time. His gaze on her was complicated, broken in some way.
“Yeah….”
He muttered quietly.
“I’ll go wash up.”
The door closed. Soon, the sound of the shower filled the silent room.
Hana couldn’t move.
Sitting on the floor, she stared blankly at her limp hands before slowly wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
Were those tears because of resentment? Or because of his confession?
Her heart was pounding. But she didn’t know why.
Maybe it was because she had seen him break down in front of her for the first time.
The man who had always quietly suffocated her, who hurt her with a single word, had hidden the name of love behind all those actions. She couldn’t believe it.
That made it hurt even more.
Why was this person only capable of loving like this?
Hana slowly lifted her head. The ceiling light blurred faintly. Her eyes stung, so she closed them again.
Geonwoo’s voice kept echoing in her ears.
“I like you.”
Though the words were soaked in alcohol, they strangely sounded sincere.
That made them even more cruel.
Hana hugged her knees. Each time she exhaled, her chest ached.
‘Now… what am I supposed to do?’
That single sentence kept spinning in her mind.
