Chapter 17
“Jooan, you’ll be okay. This dad will pray for you every day.”
It was shortly after I started inpatient treatment at the university hospital that I saw my dad for the first time since he had divorced my mom and left home when I was little.
He didn’t come every day, but at least once a week, he visited the hospital.
For about half a year.
After that half-year passed, I couldn’t see him again—just like before.
“Jooan, are you okay?”
“Stay strong. You’ll definitely get better.”
My classmates from school…
No.
My friends who used to be classmates… continued to visit me in the hospital for about another year after my dad stopped coming.
But when they all became high school seniors and started preparing for entrance exams, their visits stopped too.
And I…
Even though I turned nineteen like everyone else, I didn’t become a high school student or a test-taker…
I became a bad daughter.
Looking back now, I realize just how awful I was… to the point that I resent myself.
I opened my eyes. …Why is it so dark? I rolled over on the bed toward the nightstand. Fumbling around, I found the magic lamp and turned on the light.
In the now-bright bedroom, I checked the clock.
3:30 AM.
“…Such an awkward time to wake up.”
It’s way too early to call it “waking up early.”
I spent a moment on the bed before making a decision.
“Let’s go for a walk.”
I didn’t feel like I could fall back asleep.
I stepped out of the bedroom and started walking down the hallway.
…As I walked, memories of my time staying in the hospital surfaced.
During the treatment, I had been in so much pain.
On the days they changed my medication, I could never sleep properly. Even with painkillers, the relief was brief.
One day, I was in such unbearable pain that I cried until I lost my voice, begging to the sky.
Saying I’d do anything, just please… make it stop hurting…
I suddenly stopped in my tracks.
I wasn’t in pain now.
Though my stamina was worse than the average person, physically, I was completely healthy with no lingering illnesses.
Could it be… that my desperate wish back then had been answered, and in exchange for that…
I stood still in the quiet hallway and opened my mouth.
“I’ll do anything. Unlike last time, I really mean it this time.”
So please…
“Let me see Mom… just one more time.”
I waited, hoping something might change after voicing my wish.
But as expected… nothing happened.
“…I’m crazy.”
What on earth was I thinking?
Feeling drained, I started walking down the hall again.
Soon, I bit my lip. I regretted bringing up my mom.
The longing flooded over me, all at once. I couldn’t help it and started walking faster.
Let’s run a lap around the training ground.
Maybe that’ll clear my head.
Both my emotions and thoughts might finally settle down.
I ignored the fact that I had left my bedroom without changing clothes after waking up.
Who cares.
There’s no one at the training ground at this hour anyway…
Whoosh!
…Or so I thought.
I stopped at the entrance to the training ground. A faint breeze, clearly coming from inside, brushed past my ears.
I recognized this sound. It’s the sound of a sword slicing through the air.
‘Who in the world is training at this hour?’
Maybe… a knight who’s a little too dedicated?
I lowered my head and checked my outfit.
A white dress.
…Should be fine, right? It’s not see-through, and it has long sleeves.
Though… meeting someone like this at night could be awkward for other reasons, but it should be okay. After all, I have silver hair now. A ghost’s signature look is long black hair.
I started walking again. My emotions still hadn’t settled like usual. I still wanted to run.
Whoosh! Whoosh!
As I entered the training ground, the sound of the sword cutting the air grew clearer.
A full moon hung in the sky. Thanks to the bright moonlight, I could easily see who was swinging a sword alone at this hour.
“…Ethan?”
No, wait.
“…Brother.”
Ethan stopped his sword.
The moment our eyes met, I swallowed dryly.
‘Of all people…’
I almost wanted to sarcastically clap at the coincidence. Ethan let his sword hang loosely at his side and walked toward me.
His sword briefly reflected the moonlight. Not a practice sword… a real one.
Uh… I hope I’m not trembling right now?
Soon, Ethan stood right in front of me. He opened his mouth.
“What are you doing here at this hour, Ellie?”
I should be asking you that, Ethan Croyfort.
Why are you here at this hour, doing this?
…Well, actually, I already knew the answer.
In the novel “The Duke’s Hidden Daughter,” there’s this setup:
The Duke of Croyfort was a genius knight, unmatched not just in the kingdom but across the continent. Both of his sons inherited that genius bloodline.
But there was one unfortunate thing.
The talents of the first and second sons weren’t the same.
Ethan was definitely a genius—but Kilid was even more of one.
Ethan realized this difference at a young age. Ever since then, he worked himself to death trying to close the gap.
But talent… at least in “The Duke’s Hidden Daughter,” was cruel.
No matter how hard Ethan worked, he could never catch up to Kilid. In swordsmanship at least, Kilid was always one step ahead.
‘Still… Ethan never gave up.’
Ethan was the perfect example of a “hardworking genius.” …And I’d just witnessed that in person.
Looking at Ethan’s damp bangs up close, I answered.
“Just… thought I’d go for a walk…”
“In that outfit?”
“……”
My arms and legs are covered though… Is that still not enough for noble standards?
“Come on. I’ll walk you back.”
I blinked at Ethan’s sudden words and looked at him directly. At some point, he had already sheathed his sword at his waist.
“Walk me back? To where?”
“Your bedroom. It’s not a good time for a walk right now. Go back after sunrise.”
“……”
“And next time… change clothes first.”
“……Got it.”
Well… there was no helping it. In the end, I left the training ground without even one lap and headed back toward my bedroom with Ethan.
At least… the shock of meeting him had helped dull my earlier emotions.
There’s a saying that fits moments like this…
What was it again…? Treat poison with poison?
While lost in thought, I found myself back in front of my bedroom.
I stood with my back to the door and looked up at Ethan.
“Thanks for walking me back.”
“……”
“I’ll head in now.”
“Ellie.”
It was the first time Ethan had spoken since we left the training ground. Was he about to say, “Goodnight”…?
But what came out of his mouth was unexpected.
“About seeing me earlier… don’t tell Kilid…”
“……”
“No… never mind. Forget I said anything. Sleep well.”
I blinked, keeping my gaze fixed on Ethan’s smiling face.
Don’t tell Kilid…
‘Don’t tell him?’
So… he doesn’t want Kilid to know that I saw him practicing at the training ground at dawn?
I felt weird inside. Having read the whole novel, I knew Ethan was always desperately trying to catch up to Kilid.
But I didn’t know how Ethan felt about… himself working so hard.
That kind of thing… wasn’t covered in the book.
I didn’t take my eyes off Ethan. I noticed his smile tremble slightly.
I felt uneasy around Ethan.
Sometimes I was scared of him. I needed to find a way to safely escape this ducal house and go home, and I worried about Ethan becoming an obstacle.
…But regardless of all that, effort shouldn’t be something to look down on.
“If someday…”
“……”
“If I had to learn swordsmanship, I wouldn’t choose Kilid. I’d choose you, Ethan.”
“……”
“This decision has nothing to do with Kilid.”
Hmm… was I meddling too much? But I already said it. And unfortunately, not even in a fantasy world could I take back words once spoken.
Without checking Ethan’s expression, I turned around.
“Just saying. Good night!”
Back in my room, I closed the door and sighed.
Who’s really worrying about who here?
‘Like a mouse worrying about a cat…’
Oh well. It’s in the past now. Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I glanced at the clock again.
Still a long way till morning.
Wondering what to do next I soon headed to the bathroom.
