Chapter 67
Could Obsession Also Be Love?
“Since that day… I’ve felt like there’s always a thorn stuck in my throat, I’ve been miserable the whole time. I—too—was no different from those who whispered about you without really knowing you….”
Kailian dropped his eyes, looking embarrassed.
Himena watched him for a moment, then smiled and switched hands to offer a handshake.
“All right. Then let’s cleanly pretend none of this ever happened for both of us. It’s over now! No more talk about the staircase incident! No more talk about obsession! How about that?”
“Heh, thank you.”
“You’ve already… come all this way. It makes the seeing-off pointless.”
Himena shrugged and laughed in front of the bedroom door.
“I see.”
“You’ll be returning to Aktikos tomorrow morning, right?”
“Mm.”
“Then tonight is… the last night. We won’t see each other for a while.”
Kailian, who had been staring at her awkward smile, nervously fiddled with Himena’s hand and asked cautiously, “Himena… I have a favor to ask….”
“What is it?”
“Could you… include me among the people you hold dear?”
For a moment, Himena’s eyes wavered slightly as she met his soft red gaze.
Seeing him wait anxiously in the brief silence, she quickly changed her expression and answered cheerfully as if it were no big deal.
“Of course. Kail is my fiancé now. Even if it’s just for show, we’re lovers during the contract period, so we should treat each other as someone precious.”
“No… that’s not what I mean—”
“Today we probably looked like quite a believable couple, right? Even though the ending wasn’t great, it might actually help restore our reputations. Oh, I hope the rumor spreads quickly so even that novelist finds out. And the person who sent the threatening letters too. Haha.”
Himena averted Kailian’s gaze and fussed playfully.
“Anyway, thanks for everything today, Kail. You should leave early tomorrow, so go rest. Sweet dreams.”
Her boundary-setting attitude sprawled out again, and Kailian’s spirits sank, but he forced a small smile and asked, “What kind of dream… is a sweet dream?”
“Hm… a chubby little pig appearing in it? Like oink oink!”
Himena made a pig-snout with her fingers as a joke.
“Pfft! Heh heh. Himena, you really are—”
“Heh. Good night, Kail. See you tomorrow morning.”
“Wait.”
As Himena went to open the door, Kailian blocked it with one arm and stepped closer.
“Even if it’s just for show, we’re clearly lovers during the contract period….”
He repeated her words exactly, lifted her chin, came even closer, and whispered softly, “A goodnight kiss for my precious fiancée, at least.”
“…Kail.”
Just as his lips were about to touch the edge of Himena’s mouth—
Bang!
“Eek!”
“Miss, everything’s ready!”
Startled by Mari suddenly opening the door wide, Himena hurriedly pushed Kailian’s hand away.
“Oh? It’s all ready, huh! I see, I see! Well then, Kail? I’m off to bed. Sleep well.”
Thud!
“Wait, Hime—”
In an instant, his precious fiancée had disappeared beyond the doorway.
“Sigh….”
Kailian let out a regretful sigh in front of the closed door, then turned away with a hollow step.
“Ah… I’m tired….”
“Heh, miss, you must be exhausted today?”
Seeing Himena flop onto the bed as soon as she finished washing, Mari smiled while tidying the dress.
“Yeah… I guess palace life just doesn’t suit me. Every time I go, some incident happens….”
“Really? What happened today?”
“Prince Diego got drunk and made a scene with me; it almost turned into a fight with Kail.”
“Oh my! Was it because the miss is engaged to the marquis?”
“…Mm.”
“My goodness… Could it be the prince actually has feelings for you?”
“No way. He’s just full of pride because he’s never been rejected before. That’s why he acted like that.”
“Oh… I suppose that could be it. No wonder you came back so worn out even though it was only recently. Go to sleep, miss. I’ll put out the lights for you.”
Mari covered Himena with the blanket and started extinguishing the chandelier candles one by one with a long snuffer.
“Mari.”
“Yes?”
“Could obsession… be called love?”
Himena, lying straight and staring blankly at the ceiling, suddenly asked.
“Obsession…?”
“Mm.”
“Why… all of a sudden…?”
“I apologized to the marquis earlier. I said I was sorry for my obsession. Seeing Prince Diego today made me realize how much the marquis must have suffered because of me….”
“Oh… well… maybe… if you love someone too much… it becomes like that, right?”
Mari, who was about to snuff out the next candle, paused and fiddled with the snuffer as she spoke cautiously.
“Is that so? I don’t know much about love either, but no matter how I think about it… that doesn’t seem right to me.”
“Really?”
“The feeling called love starts within me without the other person’s permission—it’s my own emotion. Of course, if the other person feels the same, there’s no problem, but if their feelings differ… is it really proper love to force and cling to someone with a feeling that started only inside me?”
“…….”
“If you truly like or love someone… even if you can’t make them comfortable, at least—shouldn’t you avoid making them uncomfortable because of you?”
“Well… I want to be good to them… I could be even better… but if the other person doesn’t know that feeling… it’s hard and painful. Maybe… that’s why people become like that……”
Mari, who had been listening with a distant gaze, spoke in a quiet, subdued voice.
“I see… Then maybe it’s not because they love, but because they want to be loved… Perhaps my obsession with Kail wasn’t because I loved him, but because somewhere in my heart I desperately wanted to be loved… I might have had an affection deficit.”
Himena’s voice slowed and then she fell asleep, becoming still.
Under the dim chandelier, Mari watched the sleeping Himena for a while.
She then slowly extinguished the remaining candles and quietly left the bedroom.
“Diego!”
“Ah, Father—”
Diego clutched his pounding, hangover-splitting head and could not raise his face as Emperor Genos stormed into his chamber.
“Ahem!”
Genos was also shocked at his son’s disgraceful state—something he had never seen before.
The emperor had, after speaking privately with Kailian and Duke Silvester at yesterday’s charity event and conferring with the captain of the guard, returned to the banquet hall late. There he had been surprised to see Diego staggering across the hall, pushing through nobles, and had immediately called the chamberlain.
“What is the meaning of this? Why is the prince behaving like that?”
“Sire, sire! It’s that—”
Before the chamberlain could explain, Duke Silvester stepped forward, his face flushed with anger.
“The prince insulted my daughter! My daughter Himena, who only just had her engagement ceremony the other day, was humiliated and insulted in front of everyone! How could he do this to me?”
“What is this, Duke? Diego insulted a court lady?”
“Sire! As you acknowledged, I am one of the founding contributors of the Kedem Empire! No one can deny I have given everything for you and the Empire! And at today’s charity event I pledged more donations than anyone else! For my family to be humiliated here like this—”
Duke Silvester shouted, his fists trembling with rage.
“Now, Duke, calm down and explain properly. I need to know the full story to judge this matter.”
Genos tried to calm the outraged duke—worried about Diego’s drunken exit from the banquet—but to no avail.
“If you, Sire, do not punish the prince appropriately, I will not tolerate it either!”
“That is right! I watched from the side and the prince’s behavior was beyond the pale! To attempt to humiliate the newly engaged court lady—right in front of her fiancé—this cannot stand!”
Marquis Morientes, father of Alicia who had been shamed and driven away when she met Diego recently by order of the empress, suddenly stepped up and added his voice.
Perhaps still smarting from that shock, Alicia had hidden herself away and not gone out since, and it seemed her father wanted revenge.
Seeing the banquet hall grow cold, Genos could guess much of the details without being told.
The empress, embarrassed and unable to speak, looked away, and the nobles whispered—everything pointed to Diego being in a very unfavorable position.
“Ahem, I understand. I will investigate the full circumstances and if the prince is at fault I will mete out appropriate punishment. Calm down, Duke. I will also restore the court lady’s honor. How important was this charity event? I am very embarrassed the mood turned so dark. Where is the orchestra? Do I alone fail to hear the music?”
“Sire, with all due respect, I no longer feel in the mood for this banquet. I shall take my leave. If the prince is not punished, I will not attend the hunting competition either! Farewell!”
Though the gentle music suddenly swelled through the hall, Duke Silvester bowed to Genos and left, and the charity meeting could not recover its mood and ended early and abruptly.
After hearing the full account from the chamberlain, Genos called for Diego to come to his study late that night, but Diego had already passed out drunk.
So at first light the next day, unable to hold back, the emperor had come to his son’s room.
“Why on earth did you do that yesterday? It’s unlike you to be so drunk—wasting yourself like that—and to exchange such disgraceful words and actions with that tomboy in public, even to the point of drawing a blade!”
“…I’m sorry.”
“You say you’re sorry so you remember it, then. What was the reason? Don’t tell me you actually have feelings for that woman? Is that it?”
“I—it’s not—”
“There were so many witnesses, you can’t deny it now!”
The emperor, who usually trusted him without question, scolded Diego, and Diego wished he could disappear into a mousehole.
“I’m sorry, Father……”
“There’s no choice. If we let this slide, the nobles will revolt. During the hunting competition you will be confined to this western palace under restraint! You will be excluded from all official events during that period!”
