Chapter 52
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry…”
“You don’t need to apologize. It was fine. Even though I knew I was being used by you, maybe I was okay with it. Maybe I used your kind heart… but still… you seemed to genuinely care for us.”
Tears filled her eyes. Aisha, the adult I had become, now hated myself for approaching the children with the intent to use them, as I had done.
I don’t understand why I was with the grown twins, why I was their maid, or what I was trying to uncover, but regardless of the situation, I hate myself.
It was then.
Rohen gently tapped Aisha’s shoulder, who was crying.
“Aisha.”
“Yes…? Please stop talking. I… I will somehow…”
“I was already wrong. So… before I take my last breath, let me ask you something. My brother truly liked you. You… were used, but still… did you… like us?”
“I liked you. A lot… very much. That’s why I was going to cut everything off and come to you. I wanted to be by your side sincerely. But… I’m sorry I couldn’t come sooner.”
“That’s enough… If there’s one person who cried for us… despite all the terrible things we did… it seems that God has sent a small angel to us…”
Rohen smiled while looking at Aisha, who was crying profusely.
“Lari… maybe we didn’t live so badly after all… I’m glad. In this world… there is someone who will cry for us… someone who sincerely wants to save us… Thank you. For being with us until the end.”
“Young master… I mean, I mean…”
At that moment, Rohen’s breath suddenly stopped. His heart, which had just coughed up blood, stopped beating. Just like that, while maintaining his dignity as if alive, he passed away.
The energy that had filled the room vanished instantly. Aisha, now an adult, reached out to Rohen’s body a moment too late.
“Young… master?”
But there was no reply, even when she called. Only then did Aisha shake Rohen’s body desperately. There was no response.
“No… no.”
She shook Rohen and Lari alternately for a long time. But she was the only one alive in that place.
She cried and cried. Then Aisha laid Rohen on the floor, next to her beloved brother, Lari.
And Aisha began crying again. She combed his disheveled hair, removed the knife from his chest, and untied the cloak Rohen had worn, covering the two of them to hide the blood stains.
She cleaned the blood on their beautiful faces as well.
Though their pale faces made them seem alive, the expressions of both of them were peaceful. But Aisha was filled with anger.
“Everyone cursed them… but they weren’t bad children… They were just used and were like beasts who didn’t know how to express their feelings. In the end, these children couldn’t live properly and died… It’s cruel… If there is a God… He shouldn’t do this to them…”
God could not respond.
Because God had never been on their side.
“Since their childhood… they were abused without a single good memory… then they barely found a family, only to be tortured by the Empress Dowager, and their mother, whom they just met, went mad… and she died shortly after. All they did wrong… was not knowing how to love because they had never been loved…”
It seemed like Aisha, having watched these children for longer than I had, poured out her resentment toward God.
“But in the end… they were killed. In the end… they couldn’t be loved properly, couldn’t love properly, and met their deaths, the only two in this world… Where is the fairness in that? They were used… but it was the two of them who were used…”
Perhaps because she had cried too much, Aisha’s voice became increasingly muffled.
“The ones who were used were the two of them… It’s unfair… If there is a God… if there is a God…!! Please… I don’t ask for anything grand… I’m not asking for you to save them… I just want them to have one good memory from their childhood, to learn how to love and be loved… just let them have that.”
Aisha adjusted her posture, kneeling and looking up at the sky, uncertain if there was even a God.
“That’s all… If you could grant me that… you can take my life. With that, if I can repay even a little for the sins I committed against these children, the sins that made their lives so painful and led them to this tragic end… If that’s the only way I can make amends… I’ll do anything…”
It was then.
Suddenly, the glass windows of the hall began shattering one by one with a loud crash. Someone outside was throwing stones, or maybe arrows, as the glass began breaking irregularly.
And flames shot up.
“Damned Duke, come out! Kill the Duke!!”
“Bring out all the wicked people who tried to harm the Saint!”
Aisha silently looked down at the two of them.
“Even in death… you can’t rest in peace. Even after dying, is it hard for you? What did you do wrong… Still… I will protect you. So please, know that there is someone who mourns your death, someone who truly wants to save you…”
Aisha slowly tried to stand up. At that moment, a dazzling light surrounded them, making it impossible for Aisha to open her eyes.
Aisha looked around in surprise. It felt like this space was separate from everything else. Then, a voice, one that should not have been heard, reached Aisha’s ears.
[Death was the opportunity given to them.]
“What is this…?”
But Aisha still couldn’t see anything. Only the sound of the voice reached her ears.
[But do you wish to undo it, child?]
Even I didn’t know what this existence was. I only knew that Aisha was hearing something through her.
“How can death be an opportunity? That’s… that doesn’t make sense…”
[Humans are still the same. You even refuse a peaceful death. Death is happiness itself. Why can’t foolish humans understand this?]
“Peaceful? How can dying, unloved, treated like a pest by the person you love, be peaceful? You… are you a God? Do Gods not have emotions? How can you be so cruel? This… this shouldn’t be possible. Being alive is what allows us to feel sadness, joy, and happiness. But if you die, you won’t even be able to remember the ones you loved. This… this doesn’t make sense.”
I’ve heard that if you pray to God at the last moment of your life, He will answer. Perhaps this is the moment.
These were the words that came to Aisha’s mind. And it seemed like her thought wasn’t wrong as God’s voice echoed in her ears again.
[Cruelty, then. So, child, do you want to bring them back to life? They may suffer more than they did before. They will face things that might make them wish death was better. Will you be alright with that?]
“Of course. Of course I will. This time, I won’t let them hurt. I will… I will…”
[You too will face the consequences. You will live a different life from others.]
“It’s alright.”
With those words, the light faded. But the figures of the two of them did not appear again. It was like a play being shown, and then the curtain fell. Slowly, everything turned dark.
[All of this… was because you met them, and gave them your heart. Your desire to save them and your cries are because you are a… ✕✕✕… All of this happened because of you… and you will be used by me until you die. The one who will regret this moment… is you. Now I’ve found you.]
That was the end.
The voice of God, so kind and gentle before, was now something entirely different. It was broken and chilling, a voice that seemed to wake her up from her stupor.
“Ah…”
“Aisha. Are you alright?”
It was the voice of the substitute priestess. Suddenly, it felt like the world around her had changed, and everything felt different.
“Ah… yes… What happened…?”
She slowly lifted her head. I, who had been leaning against the body of the substitute priestess, urgently locked eyes with her. Strange thoughts began to surface as soon as her hand touched me.
“Did you have a dream?”
“Yes…?”
“Didn’t you have a long, long dream? Aisha?”
And surely, the substitute priestess, who shouldn’t know anything, spoke to me as if she knew something.
