Chapter 31
If it had been just a short while ago, she would have brushed off such a question easily, saying she could just hand herself over and get the mana amplifier. But strangely, the words wouldn’t come.
“…….”
Yes. The truth was, she wanted to live. She realized that she was no longer a dog who would die just because she was told to.
She was slowly beginning to understand that happiness wasn’t in staining her hands with blood or causing someone pain—it was in pouring this warm, fragrant tea, in asking after someone’s well-being.
Even a child could have known this, but Charmant, foolishly, was only just realizing it now.
After hesitating for a moment, Charmant lifted her head.
Aahil was looking at her quietly, his eyes unreadable. There was an inscrutable meaning in his gaze—almost as if he were merely trying to elicit a reaction from her.
“If we go and find Charmant Noel Kenders first… then we could easily get the mana amplifier. According to rumors, we’d just have to give up the heart. But…”
“Mm.”
“I’m not sure it’s necessary to go that far. She’s… still human, after all.”
“And?”
Charmant’s mouth went dry. Could she even say something like that to him?
‘Still, I shouldn’t die comfortably, right?’
Like Kenniz Sadinar, he might just smirk at her.
Even to her own eyes, it felt almost like deceit. Yet, her mouth moved on its own.
“I think we should find another way. I don’t want to use people as tools.”
No more. Swallowing the last words she couldn’t say, she gave a firm, clear answer.
Silence hung in the air. Charmant felt as if she were being punished.
Aahil, who had been watching her intently, seemed to have a small smile tug at his lips. In the next moment, he broke into a full, refreshing smile.
“I think so too.”
“……Huh?”
Charmant opened her mouth like an idiot.
“I said I think so too.”
Think so too?
She had expected some hidden intention, but it seemed it was simply a statement. Charmant tilted her head.
“I’ll keep thinking that way from now on.” Aahil added.
“Oh? Ah, okay.”
Charmant nodded absentmindedly. Even if he didn’t mean it that way, his words felt like encouragement—that it was okay to want life more, that it was okay because she was still human.
It seemed she had picked up a strange habit since coming here: only hearing what she wanted to hear.
By now, the teacup was empty. A slightly awkward silence lingered until Aahil stretched and rose from his seat.
“You must be tired. Rest. I’ll deliver today’s matters to the king first thing tomorrow.”
Charmant reached for his sleeve to stop him but hesitated.
Aahil looked closely at her face and asked,
“Do you have more to say?”
“Ah, nothing else.”
“Mm.”
“When we go to meet the king, could you take me with you? Like at the last banquet.”
“That shouldn’t be difficult. Because of what happened last time?”
Charmant nodded.
“Yes. I couldn’t give a proper answer that day. I think I need to decide now.”
“Alright, I’ll come pick you up here in the morning.” Aahil tapped the table with his finger.
Charmant, feeling much more at ease, saw him off.
After Aahil left, Charmant sat back down.
“It’s almost time for Jasper to arrive.”
She had been acting antagonistic toward Mya, but considering he was late past their promised time, maybe they had grown closer. Mya was a good half-elf, so Jasper must have sensed her sincerity. Children’s eyes were usually sharper anyway.
Charmant looked around at the quiet surroundings and flopped forward onto the table.
Somehow, even though she had barely used magic today, her body felt drained. During transit, she had relied entirely on Aahil’s power. The only thing she had done herself was pass the sweet potatoes she had brought to them.
Naturally, her gaze drifted to the antiques. It was almost instinctive—proof that her life force was waning.
She needed memories now—she had to survive by consuming the old memories contained in objects.
“What a peculiar race…”
Charmant stopped herself mid-sentence.
Race?
The word had come from her mouth, but it was something she hadn’t even considered moments before. Yet, in this place filled with multiple races, there couldn’t only be humans and beastmen. She had been mistaken to think that some of these people were just unusual humans.
‘If there’s a race with these characteristics…’
In the past, she would have ignored it, but she clearly remembered reading about it in the book Aahil Duff had given her. Only a few races survived by consuming memories or specific energies.
The fairies, now completely extinct in this land, did so, and the Celestial Horsefolk who handled white heavenly horses also lived off such energies. They didn’t eat human food—they lived off memories or spiritual energy.
But the problem was, neither the fairies nor the Celestial Horsefolk existed here. Both races were extinct. Occasionally, a lone Celestial Horse might be sighted, but it was either an illusion or a wild, untamed Celestial Horse—not one cared for by a Celestial Horsefolk. The fairies who once worshipped the god of old Salid had long been extinct. Humans continued to offer sacrifices in their place to avoid divine wrath.
“Could there be another race?”
No matter how much she thought, only the fairies fit this description.
“Would Alessandro know?”
Charmant Pepe said he was the oldest person she knew. Alonso had said he was over 500 years old.
Charmant tried to shake off the lingering fatigue and stood, stretching. Grasping an antique object helped her recover some energy, but she wasn’t used to it yet. Pulling up sad memories to boost energy came at a steep emotional cost. From appearances alone, she couldn’t tell if an object held happy memories or painful ones. If she picked the wrong one, the aftereffects would feel just as heavy as her current drained state.
Better to rest a little more. She didn’t want to lose this pleasant feeling today, so she decided not to absorb any memories.
But no sooner had she thought this than a headache started, as if it would split her skull.
“Ugh.”
Her legs gave way, and she collapsed. A strong tremor ran through her body, leaving her shivering violently. Objects in her vision split into three or four, and everything blurred.
It felt as if her soul were being forcibly ripped from her body.
Shivering from the terrifying sensation, Charmant hugged herself tightly.
“Ugh.”
Her entire body shook with her heartbeat, as if an earthquake had struck. Overwhelmed, Charmant finally collapsed to the floor and lost consciousness.
Charmant opened her eyes.
Blinking, she noticed the table upside down in her line of sight. She had fallen face-first onto the floor.
“…….”
With great effort, Charmant propped herself up using her weak arms.
“Ugh, this is tough.”
The feeling of her body splitting wasn’t there anymore, but she felt as frail as a deflated cabbage. What had that been? It wasn’t just the feeling of depleted life from not using an antique. It was as if someone was forcibly pulling her soul from her body.
A terrifying sense of being in the wrong place and being cast out. That was the feeling exactly.
“Oh, no way.”
Fear gripped her. Ironically, it was a fear of death she hadn’t felt the first time she died.
What if she vanished like this? She had accepted it before, but not now. She still had to care for Jasper and hadn’t yet taken responsibility for her past mistakes. She hadn’t saved her disciples either—she couldn’t just disappear.
She hugged herself, trying to gather strength, and exhaled, vowing never to die. After a while, her body began to feel much steadier.
What could the reason be? Should she ask Aahil Duff? He probably knew everything.
Charmant quickly dismissed the thought. No matter what, she couldn’t reveal her true identity to him.
‘Looks like I’ll have to find the solution myself.’
Perhaps this needed to be a priority over anything else. There was no guarantee that something like today wouldn’t happen again. She didn’t want to disappear without making any atonement.
“Charmant!”
“Welcome back, Jasper.”
Jasper returned about two hours after Charmant had recovered.
Having spent the day playing energetically with Mya until sunset, Jasper’s cheeks were flushed red, and his clothes were dust-streaked.
“You’ve gotten pretty close with Mya, haven’t you?”
“Ah, no! We’re not that close!”
Jasper paused upon entering, his cheeks redder than before, and roughly wiped his nose with his arm.
“Your clothes are telling me otherwise.”
“This is all because that witch made me move the flowerpots.”
“Flowerpots?”
