[CHAPTER 68]
At this very moment, Jerena had gone through countless agonies.
She resented Aizen for deceiving her, wondered whether to just ignore everything, and even blamed the original Jerena she barely knew.
But in the end, she reached the following conclusion.
Even if everything else was a lie, the feelings she shared with Aizen were real.
Otherwise, he and the Calad family would never have treated her kindly, risking exposure of her identity.
Jerena placed her hope on that truth and decided to ask Aizen honestly.
“Answer me honestly. I know everything now, and I’m asking sincerely.”
Even under the dark night sky, her eyes shone clear and bright as she looked straight at Aizen.
“Today, in the library, I found your portrait in an old newspaper. I also found out that Schmidt Yeongsik posed as you to act like the duke, and I saw the bracelet that Matthias only gave to family is with your mother.”
As she listed what she knew, Aizen bit his lip, still seeming torn over whether to tell the truth.
Jerena, folding her hands behind her back, looked up at the sky and suddenly asked.
“Do you remember what I said when we went to see the fireworks? I asked if you could love me even if I wasn’t someone you knew.”
“……”
“I’ve thought about it, and I think you could love me even if I weren’t someone you knew.”
If his feelings had been genuine even while hiding his identity, she could forgive him.
Some might consider it foolish, but love was always that kind of emotion.
Looking into Aizen’s eyes, which were shaking violently, Jerena made a firm decision.
“So tell me. Then… I’ll tell you the secret I’ve been hiding too.”
If Aizen confessed everything, she would reveal that she was a possessed body.
“…Your secret? What is it?”
“You have to confess first for me to tell.”
“Ah…”
Jerena smiled slightly. Aizen closed his eyes tightly, exhaled a long sigh, and rubbed his face with his palm.
Feeling it was useless to resist any longer, he finally admitted it.
“You’re right, my lady. I am Aizen Calad, and the Viscount Kreuz family was a fictional family created to deceive you.”
“I thought so.”
Jerena placed her hand on her chest. Hearing the truth from his lips caused a sharp pang.
She took a deep breath and exhaled, continuing to look at Aizen as if urging him to speak more. Aizen furrowed his brows and avoided her gaze.
“I deceived you to obtain a cure for Binghyeol syndrome. You were the only one who could make it.”
“Is that all? I don’t think so.”
If he only needed the cure, he could have paid someone to make it. There was no need to orchestrate a deceitful scheme involving others.
Aizen ran his hand through his hair and spoke in a slightly desperate voice.
“…Can’t you just leave it at that? That way, you’ll be less hurt.”
“I’m already hurt, Aizen. Let’s not keep secrets from each other anymore.”
But Jerena was firm. He had to reveal everything before she could do the same.
“If we weren’t married, then… what were we, really?”
Seeing Jerena’s unwavering gaze, Aizen hesitated for a long moment before revealing the deepest secret he had buried.
“Originally… you were a spy sent to kill me.”
Thud.
Jerena’s heart sank as if a heavy rock had fallen on her head. Her legs weakened, and she staggered, stammering in response.
Aizen, with a dark expression, recounted what had happened before she lost her memory.
Jerena gasped sharply. Though she had steeled herself, the truth before her far exceeded her expectations and was almost unbearable.
She had speculated countless reasons why Aizen deceived her, but this was beyond imagination.
“I… I really tried to poison you using the cure?”
“Yes.”
“Why… why? How did I end up sent to kill you?”
Her trembling voice grew frantic, and she gasped as if she might hyperventilate.
Aizen patted her back, waiting for her to calm down. When her breathing returned, he spoke.
“I don’t know the full reason. I only confirmed that you were sent to kill me for someone you love.”
“…You don’t even know who that person is?”
“No. You might not even truly be named Jerena. That was the name you used while disguised as a maid.”
Jerena felt even more dazed. She had thought hearing the truth would clear all questions, but it only raised more.
Countless thoughts tangled like threads in her mind. The only question she could bring herself to ask aloud was—
“Then… you never liked me? It was all an act?”
The only question Aizen could answer.
With tear-blurred eyes, she looked up at him as if clinging for an answer. Unable to meet her gaze, Aizen turned his head.
He knew her heart but could not give her the answer she wanted.
You’re the Duke of Calad. Once Binghyeol syndrome is cured, you must marry properly, start a family, and restore your house.
Victoria’s voice echoed in his mind.
As she said, Aizen was the Duke of Calad, the master of countless duties and responsibilities.
Even if he had fallen into the trap set for him, he could not expose it. He could never be swayed by personal feelings.
So, the best answer he could give Jerena was only…
“I don’t know.”
Jerena’s head dropped. A heavy silence fell between them.
Thinking she could make a fresh start even after knowing the truth was arrogance. It felt as though a swamp beneath her ankles was pulling her down.
Jerena slowly lifted her head. Though she hadn’t cried, her face looked as if she had. She spoke in a low voice, moving her lips.
“First, I’m sorry for trying to kill you. I’ll take responsibility and make the cure myself. No matter what, I will.”
“……Understood.”
Knowing she needed time, Aizen silently accepted her words.
Dark clouds rolled in, hiding the moon that had been illuminating them.
* * *
Jerena painfully realized how happy she had been as an ignorant extra viscountess.
After finishing her walk and returning to her room, tears she had been holding back fell freely.
How could she have been a spy?
And not just anyone… sent to kill Aizen…
When she first asked Aizen about his identity, she had imagined a hopeful future.
A relationship developing honestly after sharing each other’s secrets.
But if the original Jerena was a spy, everything changed. It would have been better if she had been a heavily indebted debtor.
Even though she was a possessed body, she had committed such a sin. How could she brazenly remain by Aizen’s side?
She now understood and even empathized with the hostile attitudes of her mother and father.
She wanted to meet the original Jerena, grab her by the collar, and shake her, asking if she was crazy.
Wiping tears from the back of her hand, she let out a deep sigh.
What should I do now…?
Now that she was in Jerena’s body, she had to deal with what the original had done.
How could she atone for Aizen on behalf of Jerena?
Having learned in her past life that crying alone solves nothing, she blew her nose and took out paper and pen to plan her next steps.
By dawn, she had made a decision.
I need to leave here and find out who I really am.
Then she could learn how to make Aizen’s cure and discover the identity of the villain who used her to try to kill him.
At that moment, she remembered Nel and a woman from the capital who had mistaken her identity.
Perhaps they had not been mistaken, but had truly seen her.
To the capital.
She took out a fresh sheet and wrote a letter to Aizen. After folding it neatly, she placed it on the desk and packed a small amount of belongings.
She left all the fine dresses her mother had given her and only packed the simple clothes that were originally hers.
The servants were starting to wake and prepare for work.
Before they noticed, she picked up her bag and sneaked out of the room—
“Milady.”
“Ah!”
She screamed in surprise upon seeing Greta leaning against the wall, as if waiting for her.
Her heart nearly jumped out. She clutched her chest and took a deep breath as Greta approached and met her gaze.
“Are you leaving?”
…How did she know? Was it that obvious?
