Chapter 18
There was still no reply from Jian.
Is it really okay to ignore a text from your boss like this?
It was incredibly infuriating…
And strangely cute.
How on earth was he supposed to get this woman to come upstairs?
Sitting on the wooden platform, Saheon ran a hand through his hair and looked up at the night sky. Maybe because they were in the countryside, he could see stars he had never noticed before.
Should I text her, “Want to come up and look at the stars?”
Fuck. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up.
Pretend you’re pitiful. Really tug at her protective instincts.
Why were that brat’s words popping into his head at a time like this?
Saheon let out a troubled sigh, ran a hand through his hair again, and sent another text.
Something happened that’s been bothering me.
She read it, but there was still no reply.
Yeah, right. What kind of pathetic act is this?
Just as he was about to turn off his phone, a reply came.
What happened?
…This actually works?
Saheon barely managed to suppress the corners of his mouth from lifting as he kept his response as short as possible.
It’s just… I’m having a hard time.
Are you okay?
The reply came immediately.
Damn it. What am I supposed to say?
He had never said anything like this to anyone in his life, and the words got stuck in his throat.
When he failed to reply for a while, another message arrived.
I’m coming upstairs now, Director.
＊＊＊
Jian let out a small sigh as she climbed the stairs.
She had been tossing and turning for a long time because she couldn’t seem to fall asleep tonight when a text from Saheon had arrived.
He had asked if she wanted to have a beer with him, so she’d assumed he was trying something again and hadn’t replied.
But then he said something was bothering him.
For a moment, she wondered if he was lying, but she shook her head.
Surely not.
When Jian reached the rooftop, she saw Saheon sitting on the wooden platform with his back toward her.
He had both arms stretched behind him, supporting himself against the platform as he gazed up at the sky.
She was used to seeing him dressed in nothing but perfectly fitted shirts, so seeing the back of him in a loose white short-sleeved T-shirt somehow felt strangely different.
His broad shoulders and well-defined back muscles were still unmistakably masculine, but there was something strangely lonely and wistful about him.
For the first time, she thought that perhaps he really was just an ordinary human being after all.
As Jian approached, Saheon seemed to sense her presence and turned around.
“You came?”
His smile somehow looked sad.
His eyes even seemed a little moist.
Jian carefully sat down beside him and asked,
“Did something happen?”
“No. Nothing happened exactly. It’s just… no matter how hard I try to search for my lost memories, nothing comes to me. And for some reason, it’s really getting to me tonight.”
Saheon smiled sadly and ran a hand through his hair.
He had probably been feeling particularly troubled after hearing from Manager Choi about his current situation, how this was an extremely important period in his career, and how much effort he had put into building his reputation over the years.
“Ah…”
Jian let out a small sigh and nodded sympathetically.
“Don’t push yourself too hard. The doctor said your memories will come back naturally, didn’t he?”
“I didn’t realize how helpless it would feel to have absolutely no memories. It’s like I was frozen in time and suddenly woke up.”
It must have been.
Honestly, if she put herself in his shoes and suddenly forgot all the memories of her past, she might have spent days crying out of fear.
And twelve years was such an enormous gap.
Saheon had accepted reality rather calmly until now, so perhaps she had been too indifferent to what he was going through.
Jian carefully offered him some comfort.
“You must be really anxious. But you’re doing more than well, Director.”
“Thank you. It’s just… I feel sorry toward you, Jian.”
“Toward me?”
“Because you have to stay here because of me. Even today, it’s the weekend, but you can’t go home. Honestly, it must be uncomfortable being with your boss. Even if this is your sister’s house, you have a home of your own.”
“Don’t worry about me, Director. I’m really fine. I’m happy to be with my sister and nephew after such a long time. And like you said, going back and forth would just be more trouble.”
“Thank you for saying that.”
He casually placed his hand over hers on the platform.
Jian flinched, and Saheon murmured with a forlorn expression,
“Do you know something? Whenever I’m with you, I feel at ease.”
There was such melancholy in his voice that Jian sighed.
Her heart softened, and since she didn’t pull her hand away, his large fingers slowly slipped between hers.
“My half-brothers are trying to kill me. And my memories are frozen at the age of twenty-one.”
“…”
Saheon’s thick eyelashes trembled wistfully.
“When I opened my eyes, the only people in the world who were on my side were Manager Choi and you. Honestly, Manager Choi never smiles and looks like a gangster.”
“A-a gangster…?”
Manager Choi Kang-hoon, who was blindly loyal to Saheon, had been so anxious while Saheon was unconscious that he hadn’t even had the time to care about the rough stubble growing across his face.
“I don’t know… He just looks like one. Even now, he’s sleeping alone downstairs, snoring loudly.”
That was only because he had been dealing with one problem after another lately, growing more haggard by the day.
He probably hadn’t gotten more than a few hours of proper sleep each night since the accident.
Compared to him, Jian was eating three proper meals a day and enjoying what was practically an unexpected vacation at her sister’s house…
“But you, Jian, are so kind. I can genuinely feel that you’re worried about me.”
His words made Jian feel strangely guilty. She cleared her throat and looked away.
Saheon was still holding her hand tightly.
Yet somehow, his touch seemed to be growing more intimate.
When Jian tried to pull her hand away, he tightened his grip and murmured sadly,
“See? Holding your hand really does make me feel calm.”
“…”
He was saying it like that, and she couldn’t bring herself to yank her hand away when the scars on the back of his hand caught her eye.
They were abrasions from the accident.
His hands were large and distinctly masculine, with thick knuckles and sturdy bones. Small wounds had healed across each of his fingers, leaving behind faint scars.
Perhaps noticing her gaze on his hand, Saheon gave her a faint smile.
“My hands look ugly, don’t they?”
“No. They’re not ugly at all.”
“You really are a good person, Jian.”
“I’m not that good.”
“No. You’re the kindest and most tender-hearted person I’ve ever met. Everyone around me was practically a devil.”
Perhaps because he genuinely believed he was twenty-one, the way he lowered his eyes listlessly made him seem almost innocent.
What kind of life had he lived?
Jian looked at him with pity, and Saheon met her gaze.
“Want to have a beer?”
Beer? All of a sudden?
Jian hesitated suspiciously, and he let out a long sigh as he looked up at the sky.
His eyes, dark as the night sky itself, reflected the stars and seemed unusually moist and bright.
“I’m just feeling unsettled. This whole situation is ridiculous… I thought maybe a can of beer would make me feel a little better.”
“…Then just one can.”
At that, Saheon immediately stood up.
His quick movement, as though he had been waiting for exactly that answer, felt slightly strange, but Jian forced herself to dismiss her growing suspicion.
He returned from the rooftop room carrying beer and an icebox and handed Jian a can.
“Here.”
“Thank you.”
She held the cold can in her hand and pushed the tab up with her thumb.
Pop.
Gas hissed out, and a little foam rose to the top.
Jian brought the can to her lips, stealing a sideways glance at Saheon.
The masculine line of his throat moved smoothly as he swallowed his beer.
It looked like something straight out of a commercial, and she kept finding her eyes drawn toward him.
Pretending not to notice her gaze, Saheon lowered his can and asked,
“Has your sister lived here all her life?”
“No, not exactly.”
Only then did Jian take another sip of her beer and lower her gaze.
“My brother-in-law passed away last year.”
“I’m sorry.”
“That’s when they sold their house in Seoul and came back here. They used the money from selling the house to buy this one. They turned the first floor into a bakery, and my sister and Dong-yoon live upstairs.”
“I shouldn’t have asked.”
“It’s okay.”
An awkward silence settled between them.
Jian tucked a strand of hair blown loose by the humid night air behind her ear and continued.
“My brother-in-law also worked for Hyungang.”
“Really?”
“Yes. He worked at Hyungang Tech Research Institute, which is run by Executive Director Lee Jae-sung.”
Jian took another sip of beer, lost in thought, before giving a bitter smile.
“I applied to Hyungang because of him, actually. My brother-in-law and sister met when they were in their early twenties. I was in middle school back then, and my brother-in-law was almost like a father to me.”
Saheon quietly listened to her.
Sadness gathered in Jian’s eyes.
“He used to praise Hyungang a lot. You know how difficult it is for ordinary office workers to sincerely praise the company they work for.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Was your brother-in-law ill?”
“No…”
Jian’s voice trailed off.
She rubbed her fingers over the cold beer can, which was covered in beads of condensation.
“It was suicide.”
Saheon froze at the unexpected words.
