Chapter 12
“My lady, I’ll prepare everything for you.”
It was Mary, who had gone to fetch my things and returned to me, still unbathed.
But Mary’s voice was calm in a way different from moments before.
“Mary, what happened?”
“…It’s, my lady…”
“Speak, it’s okay.”
“…Ah, the things you always used weren’t ready. So… I brought Lady Priscilla’s things instead.”
As if trying to hide what she had prepared, Mary hugged the items and bowed like a criminal. I hadn’t expected Priscilla to be so petty, not only changing my room but even meddling in such small matters.
I pressed my eyelids with my fingers and got up from the bed.
“It’s fine, let’s get ready, Mary.”
“…I’m sorry, my lady.”
“It’s not your fault.”
Mary felt helpless for being unable to do anything in this situation, and tears welled up in her eyes. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the energy to console her.
Whether she realized it or not, Mary, moving sluggishly, began preparing my bath with her familiar motions.
But I frowned.
I tried to ignore it, but the items Priscilla had used were saturated with that pungent perfume.
‘Damn it, my nose hurts.’
While receiving Mary’s usual assistance, I finished preparing.
Knock, knock.
A knock sounded at the door.
“I don’t think anyone would come, who could it be?”
“Hmm, I don’t know, my lady.”
“…Who is it?”
Could it be Priscilla? Despite our recent encounter, had she come to gawk at me in my room? Or was it someone else?
‘Many people welcome me.’
Not a welcome I enjoyed, but I hated even more the idea of someone waiting outside my door for too long.
“Come in.”
“I’ll enter, my lady.”
The one who entered was the maid who had been behind Priscilla earlier. Her small frame, completely different from Priscilla’s, was striking. Of course, I wasn’t about to start with introductions.
“Who are you?”
“I’m Lillis, a new maid in the Guinevere family, my lady.”
“Really? And what’s your role?”
“I’m Lady Priscilla’s personal maid.”
“Oh, really? Did Priscilla choose you herself?”
“Yes.”
Was she skilled enough for Priscilla to pick her personally? I scrutinized Lillis carefully. She seemed like an ordinary girl, so was she truly competent enough to be by Priscilla’s side at this time?
‘Well, that’s none of my concern.’
What mattered to me now was why Lillis had come to my room.
“Lillis, why are you in my room?”
“Lady Priscilla wishes for you to meet the young master alone.”
“I didn’t say I’d go see him.”
“…You must go now.”
“Must it be now?”
Lillis pressed her small lips together for a moment, then spoke.
“The elders frequently come to observe the young master.”
“And?”
“There’s no one there now.”
In other words…
‘Is there something keeping the elders away?’
I narrowed my eyes. I tried to deduce what had happened to the elders, what Priscilla was planning to gain from this opportunity, and whether I should comply with her plan.
“My lady, you must go now.”
“Wait a moment, let me think.”
“There’s no time.”
“Don’t rush me.”
What should I do? I tapped my fingers on my thigh.
‘I’d like to refuse to go, but if I do, Priscilla will come herself.’
Then, the answer was clear.
“Hurry, I’ll go now.”
“Thank you, my lady. The young master’s room is next to the lord’s.”
“Lillis.”
“Yes, my lady.”
“I’m tired, so no unnecessary talk.”
Lillis nodded in agreement, then turned and left the room. I followed her steps.
Toward the child who had taken everything from me since his birth.
* * *
I had heard that an Alpha’s growth was strangely rapid.
‘But I didn’t expect it to be this fast.’
I couldn’t hide my astonishment, my eyes widening. It was true I had learned this as a child, but seeing this peculiar growth firsthand was surprising. There was a reason for my shock.
A child, not even a month old since birth, looked as though he had grown significantly. It’s said an Alpha takes five to ten years to reach adulthood to facilitate rapid generational turnover, but seeing it directly was astonishing.
He looked about three years old, with glossy black hair, sparkling golden eyes, and plump cheeks. He was an extremely handsome child.
His wolf-like ears, which he couldn’t yet hide, and his swaying tail added to his charm.
Simply put, the child was very cute. If he weren’t an Alpha, he would surely have been the center of the family’s attention.
‘What bad luck.’
To be born in a den full of power-hungry wolves. Even his only sister didn’t harbor kind feelings toward him.
And yet…
‘He’s truly a child.’
He showed no wariness toward a stranger entering his room, instead smiling at me innocently. His appearance was delightful, until I realized his smile resembled someone else’s.
Before my mood could worsen further, I spoke to Lillis:
“…What’s the child’s name?”
“Cain Guinevere.”
“Alright, who chose the name?”
“…Lady Priscilla.”
As expected, Priscilla chose it. My father, as I knew him, wasn’t the type to indulge in paternal affection, so he likely just saw the child and left him be.
‘He sees his children as tools.’
So, it must have been my mother who chose my name. I nodded slightly, then turned my gaze back to the child.
“Ka!”
Cain reached out his hands toward me, as if wanting my touch. Despite his physical growth, his actions were no different from an infant’s. And of course, given his birth date, he was indeed an infant.
“When will he start speaking?”
“At least three months from now.”
“Fast.”
“Because he’s an Alpha.”
Three months. In three months, he would speak and walk. That was an Alpha’s trait. But I didn’t understand why the word “Alpha” pierced my heart like a needle. Or rather, I didn’t want to understand.
I didn’t want to admit the sense of inferiority I carried.
I knew the answer but pretended ignorance. That way, the child would seem less hateful.
“Koo…!”
Cain continued reaching for me, and when I didn’t take his hand, he looked upset, shaking his arms vigorously. Though mentally an infant, his three-year-old appearance made his actions seem slightly threatening, especially since he was larger than a typical three-year-old.
“Why don’t you hold his hand? He seems to like you.”
“He’s probably used to people’s hands.”
“There are many visitors.”
Of course, he was the precious Alpha. The child who would provide the opportunity to break free from my father’s absolute authority. The elders wouldn’t leave him alone.
“Alright, hold it. You don’t know what kind of hand he’s holding.”
I extended my hand to Cain. Delighted to get what he wanted, Cain laughed and gripped my hand tightly.
‘…His warmth is high.’
The temperature of his hand was warm. His innocent smile as he looked at me didn’t belong in this palace.
‘He makes it impossible to hate him.’
Despite knowing he took everything from me, I couldn’t hate that bright smile. Yes, the child was innocent.
‘Yes, because he’s innocent.’
A strange sense of helplessness pushed me to the depths. Since my mother’s death, I hadn’t shed a tear, but I suddenly felt heat in my eyes. But that was all. It had to be.
Before I could sink into my emotions, I spoke the child’s name.
“Cain.”
“Ka!”
I thought saying his name would be difficult. But, contrary to my expectations, it came out of my mouth easily.
“Cain.”
I repeated his name. It felt as if the resentment I had been carrying faded. At the same time, I felt a deep ache in my chest, and a suppressed sob arose. This child rendered me completely helpless. He was too innocent.
So much so that I wanted to hug him and cry loudly.
Despite trying to control myself.
“Your life is tough too.”
The blessing you received isn’t necessarily good, and now you, little child, must walk the rough path I’ve walked.
Why were you born my brother, Priscilla’s son? No, why were you born an Alpha Guinevere?
I bit my lip hard, trying to stop myself from breaking down. Cain looked at me with an expression that understood nothing, then his face began to crumple as if he were about to cry. Soon, he burst into deep, sorrowful sobs, so much that I felt relieved watching him.
“Hooo! Hic, hooo!”
“Oh, young master!”
Lillis, startled by Cain’s sudden crying, tried to soothe him by picking him up. But I stopped her by extending my arm toward her.
“…Let him.”
“Yes…?”
“Let him cry.”
“But the lord hates the sound of a child crying.”
Lillis seemed afraid that my father would come out of his room and scold Cain. But her worry was just that, worry.
‘My father won’t come for this reason.’
No matter how much my father hated the sound of children crying, he wasn’t one to bother coming without reason.
‘The day my mother died, I was crying, but he didn’t even glance at me.’
So…
“Let him cry. If not now, when will Cain get to cry like this?”
At least now, let him cry. Let him cry on behalf of someone who wants to but cannot.
I watched Cain quietly as he cried until he was exhausted. Without expression, without movement.
