“…It was not very good. Sleeping close to you spared me the worst of it, but still, you were in a weakened state.”
Thinking about it, there was a shadow over Rastan’s eyes again, like before.
He didn’t tell me in detail, but it was clear he had gone through a rather difficult time as well.
Feeling sorry for all he must have endured, I tightly wrapped my arms around his solid body beside me.
“I am sorry. I should have been the one responsible for your dreams.”
“Thank you, but why would you…”
“You do everything for me, but that is the only thing I can do for you.”
“You can give me…”
Rastan hesitated for a moment, then continued.
“…An engagement as well, can you not?”
Well, he might still be under constant pressure from the Imperial Family about marriage proposals even now.
‘Then he must be feeling quite pressed for time.’
Even in such a situation, the fact that he never forced me or resorted to underhanded means until the very end felt very much like him.
At that moment, I realized that Rastan’s gaze was directed at my lips.
‘Uh…?’
Even when I met his eyes, he didn’t look away.
The unabashed gaze made me the one who grew flustered now.
My face warmed hotly, yet strangely, at the same time, I felt oddly exhilarated.
‘What’s wrong with me? Am I a little drunk?’
For some reason, it felt like anything would be fine right now.
Was it because of the cozy, dreamlike atmosphere created by the candles flickering throughout the room?
Or maybe it was because Rastan’s face before me suddenly felt unreal.
“….”
For a moment, the two of us silently looked into each other’s eyes, and then at each other’s lips.
In this moment, what we both wanted was clear.
It felt like I wouldn’t dislike whatever Rastan did to me, and I was certain that whatever I did, he wouldn’t refuse.
Of course, he had said something like that a few days ago, but separate from that, there was an atmosphere I could feel with my entire body right now.
Was I drunk on wine?
‘Or maybe, this time, I’ve truly been enchanted by Rastan.’
I stopped thinking any further. And just like that, I leaned toward his face and lightly pressed my lips to his alluring red lips.
“…!”
The instant our lips touched, his blue eyes wavered. Like a stone thrown into a calm lake, a distinct crack formed in eyes that were always composed.
Feeling shy even after being the one to do it, I tried to pull away, but Rastan wrapped an arm around my waist, pulled me back, and held my cheek with one hand. Then he hurriedly pressed his lips to mine.
“Mmph…!”
Startled, I opened my eyes wide.
Rastan’s kiss was desperate and rough, not even comparable to my careful, light one.
The man I knew was dignified, well-mannered, the very model of a gentleman.
But there was no gentleman here now. There was only a skilled, rough man who tried to press in deeper, not even giving me room to breathe.
I didn’t even have the leeway to be surprised that he had such a side to him.
When I pressed my hand to his chest and pushed him away because I was running out of breath, he pulled his lips back slightly, looking regretful, but compliant.
“Hoo, haa….”
Rastan’s eyes as he looked at me while I caught my breath felt unfamiliar.
The blue eyes that were always so composed seemed slightly loosened now. They looked darker than usual, and a very faint madness even flickered within them.
I couldn’t keep looking at his face any longer.
Because he immediately pressed his body close to mine again and kissed me.
As the kiss continued, every part of my body that touched his grew warmly flushed.
‘Why is he so good at this…?’
I had thought he was nothing but an abstinent, upright gentleman. Where on earth had he learned something like this?
Gradually, even my head grew hot, and it felt as if my entire body were melting into a daze.
‘How did I end up doing something like this with a man who used to be just a friend?’
All the time I had drawn a line, insisting he was only a friend, both in my previous life and after my regression, now felt meaningless.
We could no longer return to the same relationship as before, to being just friends. Ever.
The deep kiss went on for a long time. Thinking that if I let it continue, we might spend the entire night like this, I gently pushed Rastan away at this point.
When some distance formed between our faces, the first thing that caught my eye were his lips, flushed red and glistening.
‘Why does this look so indecent.’
Embarrassed, I bit my own lips, which were surely just as swollen and red, and spoke hesitantly.
“I should sleep now. This should be more than enough to have an effect on today’s dreams….”
But instead of pulling away, Rastan drew me closer by the waist and hugged me, speaking in a low, suggestive voice.
“I am curious about the effect on you as well.”
“On me?”
No matter what we did, it wouldn’t affect my dreams at all, so what on earth did he mean?
When I widened my eyes, he curled one corner of his lips up playfully.
“Whether it had the effect of making you feel good.”
“Ah, that…”
I hadn’t expected him to be curious about something like that, so I fumbled, unsure how to answer, and barely managed to ask back.
“Why…?”
“Because I did my best. I was afraid you might say you would never do it again if you did not like it.”
As he spoke, he pressed a kiss to the back of my hand, then looked at me with those eyes that always seemed to enchant people.
“Tell me this was not the first and last time.”
For him to say something like that when we didn’t even know how effective the kiss would be on his dreams.
‘Does that mean he didn’t kiss me only because of the dreams?’
Thinking that, amusingly enough, made me feel quietly pleased, so I decided to answer without holding back too much.
“Well, we will see tomorrow. If it works well on your dreams tonight, then I will think about it.”
I had indirectly expressed that I liked it too, and that this wouldn’t be the last time, and it seemed Rastan had picked up on that meaning.
I could tell from the way his eyes curved pleasantly.
“Very well.”
He smiled faintly, seeming to think about something for a moment, then spoke a little cautiously.
“I hinted at it earlier, but I was not sure we would be able to talk about this tonight… Seeing the mood now, it seems like we can.”
“What are you talking about?”
Curious about what he was being so careful to bring up, I perked my ears.
“Our engagement. May I ask for your thoughts on it?”
‘Ah.’
Well, now that I had recovered and we had even kissed, there was no reason not to talk about this.
Thinking back, ever since I entered the Blake estate, he had been subtly, and sometimes openly, encouraging the idea of an engagement whenever he found the chance. Almost as if that had been the very reason he brought me into this manor.
‘I had thought that if it kept going like this, one day I might agree without even realizing it.’
And truly, before I knew it, I was already beginning to feel that an engagement with him was the natural next step.
Perhaps it was because everyone in this manor, including Sally, wanted it with one heart and one mind, and talked about it frequently.
‘But still… maybe I should check just one more thing.’
I recalled a question I had been keeping tucked away in a corner of my heart for some time.
No matter what, it felt like something I needed to confirm before deciding on an engagement with him.
“Um, can I ask you just one thing?”
“Anything.”
I hesitated briefly, choosing my words.
“Well… you have a woman you like, do you not?”
It was because of a memory from before, when I had attended Rastan’s birthday banquet held here at the ducal estate.
That day, when we were walking alone toward the main building so I could change into a dress, hadn’t he clearly said this?
“A birthday banquet, prepared in a hurry?”
“I had no intention of holding one originally, but I decided on it suddenly. There was someone I truly wanted to invite.”
“Mm, it seems there is someone you are developing feelings for.”
“…It is a one-sided feeling on my part.
Rastan’s gaze wavered slightly, as if he were embarrassed, but soon he gave a small nod.
‘Just as I thought.’
It was something I already knew, yet my chest still ached for no reason.
Seeing the way he treated me sometimes made me think, ‘Does he like me?’
But because I had heard before that he had a woman he had feelings for, I could dismiss it all as my own misunderstanding.
The problem was that this engagement wouldn’t remain a mere engagement on paper. Because of Rastan’s curse, it would realistically involve a fairly significant level of physical intimacy.
‘Like the kiss just now.’
