Chapter 38………………………………………….
I tilted my head.
“Did I say something strange?”
“…You suddenly said you’re leaving.”
“Was it too sudden? I’m sorry. There wasn’t really a proper time to bring it up.”
It was the first time Terrence had asked today, and I hadn’t felt the need to mention it either.
He answered with a dazed expression.
“This is nothing you should apologize for.”
Then, lowering his gaze, he murmured thoughtfully to himself.
“I see. Alright then.”
“Tei?”
“This is nothing for you to feel sorry about.”
“Excuse me, what did you just say?”
He spoke so softly that I hadn’t heard it clearly.
“No… it’s nothing.”
When he looked at me again, his face had returned to its usual expression: bright and charming, though somehow a slight distance lingered.
“Did I say something strange?”
“Of course not. I just… realized something anew.”
“What is it?”
“It’s a secret. Even I find it a little embarrassing.”
Embarrassing? I wasn’t sure how that conclusion came from our previous conversation.
“Simply… I suppose I regarded myself as more important than I really am. Now I see reality clearly.”
I didn’t understand what he meant at all. Before I could even respond, he held out his glass.
“Shall we toast? Comrades, after all.”
For some reason, the word “comrades” sounded different from how he used it before.
“I hope all your goals are achieved.”
But his face was completely clear and sincere, so I dismissed my earlier impression as a mistake.
“I hope your goals are achieved too, Tei.”
As I lifted my glass, he asked,
“I don’t think we’ve ever talked about my goals. How do you know them?”
Obviously, he meant surpassing the crown prince to become emperor. That was all the novel revealed about Terrence’s goals.
“But that might not be the whole story.”
The novel only showed one facet of him. If so, what were the goals of the human Terrence, not the hidden mastermind?
“Besides successfully becoming crown prince, what else do you want? I’m curious as your comrade.”
“Honestly, I’m not sure. My life has been closer to resignation than aspiration for a long time.”
That was the life of an illegitimate child of the emperor.
“So now I plan to find out.”
“You’ll find a worthwhile goal, I’m sure.”
“If it turns out that way… that would be wonderful.”
We clinked our glasses. The cheerful sound echoed across the quiet terrace.
The night among comrades passed peacefully.
Another day went by, but Terrence treated me as usual: polite, courteous, and friendly.
The strange feeling I had that night had completely vanished.
“It really was just my imagination.”
“What was?”
“Ah, nothing.”
Sharon smiled and tapped my shoulder.
“You must be bored from all the meetings. Go get some fresh air.”
I felt embarrassed. Even here at Sharon’s office, right before the divorce trial, I was distracted by other thoughts.
I needed to focus. Right now, the divorce was the most important thing.
“Alright. I’ll step out for a moment.”
“Ah, wait a moment.”
Sharon handed me something she received from Lobby—a letter.
“This came for you, Lady Idel.”
“Oh, no sender listed.”
“They said they were asked by someone else to give it to Lobby first.”
“Who could it be?”
I opened the envelope casually and began reading, but my eyes widened in shock.
“I need to go quickly. It might take longer than a walk.”
“What’s the matter?”
“I received contact from someone I’ve been waiting for.”
It was a letter from the butler.
The butler was at the park mentioned in the letter.
“What confidence.”
Even the Cassius family would never have imagined that the butler they were frantically searching for could stroll openly through the city center in broad daylight.
“Isn’t this dangerous?”
I walked to a bench and sat a short distance away. The butler, watching pigeons, spoke without looking at me.
“I once served as the Duke’s first aide. I trained everyone who now serves him.”
In other words, he knew exactly how Cassius would move.
“Unless my enemies have hidden me somewhere, they won’t search here.”
He also knew Cassius’ intentions completely. After all, someone who disappeared from Cassius’ sight wouldn’t be so bold as to be in the empire’s capital.
Moreover, the park was unusually quiet, perhaps due to it being a weekday, making my light disguise almost unnecessary.
“And your son?”
“Miss… no, Lady Idel, you are very kind.”
“Huh?”
I asked about Joshua, who had disappeared from the house, but received an unexpected compliment.
“You asked about my son first, not whether I’d testify in court.”
“Well…”
“To answer your question, Joshua is fine.”
The butler smiled gently.
“Though nervous from the long journey and new environment, he’s much better than I expected.”
“That’s a relief.”
“…I should have left the Cassius estate sooner.”
Regret laced his voice.
“The night Lady Idel left, I asked him if he wanted treatment in the capital. Contrary to expectations, he agreed immediately.”
The butler gripped the handle of his cane tightly.
“That’s when I realized my foolishness—keeping him in Cassius’ land when it would have been better for him to return to his hometown.”
“….”
“How could I not have noticed? That place was his hometown but also full of painful memories. That good child silently endured for his unworthy father.”
From the high vantage point of the grand Cassius Castle, the butler’s house likely had windows facing the castle.
“Joshua could see Cassius Castle from his room.”
He must have faced those traumatic memories from his window. I could only imagine how dreadful that felt.
Yet he left home and came to this place, where the Cassius family gathered—a testament to how grim things had been.
“An unworthy father, indeed.”
The butler’s shoulders slumped.
This was not a topic for a third party to speak lightly about, but I decided to say something.
“We cannot turn back time, but mistakes can be corrected, even belatedly. Scars may remain, but they can heal.”
Our eyes met.
“If I were your son, I’d be glad my father finally acted for me.”
“…Even though he’s been blind until now?”
“Still, your son trusted you enough to step into this unfamiliar land. He came out of the room he had been confined to.”
If Joshua had deeply resented the butler or lost all trust in his father, that wouldn’t have been possible.
“Of course, this is just my guess. The most important thing is to speak directly with the person involved.”
The butler quietly absorbed my words, gazing at the peaceful park.
“Now that you’ve left your duties, why not spend more time with your son?”
At that moment, a running child and a worried man passed by.
“Daddy, hurry! The ice cream man might leave!”
“Careful, don’t rush.”
A tender father-and-son scene.
“….”
The butler remained silent for a while before speaking in a slightly hoarse voice.
“Thank you.”
Warm sunlight fell across the path before the pair.
After some time, he changed his tone.
“Actually, there’s another matter for today.”
The atmosphere was lighter than before.
“Are there seats left in the witness section for the upcoming trial? There seems to be a tardy person here.”
Hearing the words I had long hoped for, I blurted out loudly.
“Of course!”
Then we sat on a park bench and discussed the trial.
The butler assured me he would testify that I never had the rights of a mistress, and that Liandro and I were never a normal couple.
There was also new information.
“…So Liandro said those things?”
“Yes. He consulted with me, for sure.”
Liandro had confided in the butler about his marital troubles.
“Alright, that’s fine… up to this point.”
It’s natural to seek advice if your relationship with your spouse is strained. But what he said was absurd.
“He said he didn’t feel me as a woman. Before marriage, he thought he was drawn to Lady Idel and that it was love, but it was a mistake.”
What? He doesn’t feel me as a woman? That’s insane.
I hadn’t expected him to love me, but I never imagined he couldn’t even see me as a woman. My pride was wounded.
“Well, I didn’t love him either! It was a mistaken affection from just reading the novel!”
In front of the butler, I swallowed my anger silently. Love or not, I couldn’t help being offended.
He must have found it amusing and awkward, watching me struggle to improve our relationship when there was no hope.
Really, what a terrible man.
