#62. You Belong to Me.
Who on earth are these guys now?
I glared at the seven or so men with annoyance.
Rough-looking men held thick clubs and folding knives in their hands.
“Heh heh. We only came to take Boritz, but who knew there’d be such pretty girls too!”
“We could sell these girls and still cover the principal on that debt.”
“Luck’s on our side today!”
Their cheap swagger and the way they spoke made it obvious they were nothing but a low-class gang.
I looked at Boritz, silently asking for an explanation.
He pulled his black hood down tighter and trembled like a willow leaf in drizzle.
“They’re debt collectors. They said they’d come next month… I don’t know why they showed up today.”
Boritz was afraid I and Susan would be harmed because of him.
“Oh? That red-haired girl looks familiar.”
“That’s the woman from before! The one who always had a bunch of guards with her!”
So that’s why he seemed familiar.
They were the thugs who had crawled around on the muck-smeared street. The ruffians we’d met in the back alley of a shop when looking for Boris.
One of the gang pointed his finger at me.
“Looks like you’re all alone this time — you couldn’t have met someone luckier! We were gonna find ya and teach ya a lesson.”
“So they were the ones before? Hi. I’m not very glad to see you.”
“Same cocky tone as always! We’ll beat that arrogance outta you — see if you still yap like a dog!”
The thug flexed his forearm and lunged.
The others snickered and watched their comrade attack, confident he’d make me beg for mercy.
Then Franz shouted.
“Shade. Protect Elizabeth!”
There was no answer.
Only a man suddenly appeared in the empty space.
‘What kind of skill is that? Did he really jump out of the shadows?’
Before I could even wonder, Shade charged at the thugs.
He seemed to vanish.
A black shadow fluttered through the air.
Fast, silent, graceful.
Wherever the shadow swept, the men with weapons screamed and fell.
“Arrgh!”
“What’s happening? Gah!”
Even as they coughed up blood, they had no idea what had struck them.
A brutal scene unfolded one after another.
Franz’s eyes went wide with shock.
He was, after all, a clever ten-year-old.
A boy raised nobly, surrounded by gold and jewels.
Susan hugged Franz tightly from behind.
“Don’t look. It’ll be over soon.”
Susan covered Franz’s eyes with her small hand.
Though she trembled herself, she seemed determined to shield Franz.
Franz could not keep up a polite, composed front. Boritz was frozen in place too.
The farm, which had been full of warm sunlight and the fresh scent of herbs, was soaked with blood.
Bodies of men lay in heaps near Shade’s feet, their life or death uncertain.
“We didn’t need to kill them, did we?” I asked.
Shade didn’t answer.
“They were just petty debt collectors. You could’ve chased them off, right?”
Shade looked at me with eyes devoid of feeling.
He looked so calm, almost like an innocent boy.
Not the reaper who’d just taken at least seven lives.
“Are you not speaking because you can’t, or because you won’t?” I asked.
“…….”
“Don’t ever do that again. Get my permission before you kill someone.” I warned coldly, pressing my fingertip into his chest.
Shade seemed to think for a moment.
He gave a faint, barely perceptible nod.
Was it my imagination, or did his eyebrows lower slightly?
“Unni! We need to go back right now. His Highness… he’s having trouble breathing!” Susan said, still holding Franz.
Franz’s lips were chalk-white.
His face was waxen pale.
Seeing him gasping and unable to breathe properly made my chest tighten.
‘It’s all my fault. I was reckless.’
I swallowed the rising guilt and shouted.
“Shade. Take Crown Prince His Highness to the palace! As quickly as you can!”
The long day faded into dusk.
I bit my thumbnail in the dim corridor.
“The prince was just very startled; there’s nothing else. A few days’ rest and he’ll recover,” the court physician had said, but I couldn’t relax.
I didn’t have the courage to enter Franz’s bedchamber.
‘Why didn’t I foresee this? I knew Boritz had been hassled by debt collectors in the alleys.’
It wasn’t that I hadn’t known — I had neglected it.
I thought Boritz needed a harsh awakening to learn reality’s bite.
That way he’d behave like a docile sheep, do as I wished.
I even expected those men to pressure Boritz in dangerous ways.
So I didn’t forgive any of the debt — on purpose.
If I saved him at the right moment, he’d be more grateful.
And because of that, this had happened.
“I’m sorry, Elizabeth. I was stubborn and put you in an awkward situation,” Franz said from Shade’s arms.
Even then, Franz’s gentleness worried about me and pierced my heart.
‘You did nothing wrong, Franz. Do whatever you want like an ordinary child. I’ll take responsibility for the rest.’
No matter what, I should have protected Franz.
I forgot the most important duty as his tutor.
Without Shade, Susan and Boritz could have become endangered too.
Our safe return was sheer luck.
‘I was too cocky because I knew the original story. I can’t even protect people I care about with my own strength. I was the truly irresponsible one.’
Regret surged like a tidal wave.
One self-reproach followed another.
Someone I least wanted to meet called my name.
“Elisabeth.”
I couldn’t raise my head.
Nikolai called again.
“Elisabeth.”
His mid-low voice sometimes had a magical power.
It could turn reality into fantasy, wash a clouded sky into clear blue.
It pushed away the crowded loneliness inside me and stirred an unfamiliar flutter.
I liked that.
It made me happy.
But today, I didn’t want to see him.
“I’m sorry, Your Majesty.” I apologized as formally as possible.
“Look up.”
“I am a sinner. How can I look upon Your Majesty’s face?” I replied.
“Drop that strange tone.” he said.
“I deeply apologize for my previous disrespect.”
“It feels foreign. Awkward.”
I’d become so used to speaking informally with Nikolai that formal polite language felt strange.
I’d spent private moments with the emperor, enjoyed countless privileges.
I didn’t even know they were privileges.
I was deluded.
I resented Nikolai.
For not telling me why Simon was killed, for not meeting me, for failing to shield me from the torrents of criticism from all sides.
I felt wounded as if I were his true lover.
At night I missed him.
‘This past event made it clear. Nikolai is Nikolai, and I am who I am. I must handle my own affairs.’
Being cared for like that by someone was dangerous.
Because I would grow more dependent.
I would start asking for help with things I could solve alone.
I’d become used to the comfort Nikolai offered, like a baby bird nestled in its mother’s warmth.
I could no longer permit that.
‘This will be a pretext. The more I stay at the palace, the more people will whisper that I’m the villainess and Nikolai the tyrant. We cannot be together. For his sake. For mine.’
It seemed perfectly rational.
I wanted to turn away completely.
Act as if I knew nothing and stay by Nikolai’s side.
I wanted to burrow into his broad, warm embrace.
I wanted to bind this man who made me feel special to my side, no matter what anyone said or what future awaited.
But I couldn’t.
I couldn’t do that.
Because I loved Nikolai.
“I have failed in my duties as the tutor. Please punish me appropriately.”
I spoke with my gaze fixed on my toes.
Nikolai interposed himself and defended me.
“Pinch said it was she who begged to come along.”
“It’s my duty to soothe a young prince. Still, I accept that I put His Highness in danger.”
“Everything ended safely. That should be enough.”
“Would you say that even if Sir Shade hadn’t accompanied them?”
Nikolai didn’t answer.
Only then did I look up at him.
‘Why does his face look so worn? It’s heartbreaking…’
How long had it been since we last met? Had he wasted away like someone who hadn’t even been offered a bowl of porridge?
His tired eyes showed thin veins here and there.
His tangled black hair still shone like wet silk, but the arrogant, overly confident air was gone.
Pity clamped at my throat.
What had he been through alone?
A flash of the image of Nikolai quietly suffering crossed my mind.
‘He wouldn’t ignore me for his own comfort. There must have been a reason he couldn’t say. Once again I was disappointed and then resentful.’
I wanted to hug him.
I wanted him to rest in my arms for a moment.
But now was not the time.
“So. What… are you going to do?” I asked.
Nikolai couldn’t hide his expression before me.
He looked like a wounded beast as he asked.
Like a predator frozen by fear at our first meeting.
He rules over all, but there are people he cannot control.
“I will leave the palace.”
“……Forbidden.”
“I will leave. Please allow me.”
“Do you want to be imprisoned?”
“Even if I’m detained first, I will leave afterwards. My decision won’t change.”
I stated it firmly.
Those words were meant to persuade myself, not him.
“You signed the contract. You cannot leave my side until it ends.”
“I’ll give up.”
“Can you bear it?”
“I’ll give you my mansion and lands, physical assets, merchant-guild ownership — everything I have.”
“I’ll sell you and your parents into slavery.” he snapped.
“I’ll become a fugitive slave and hide.”
Nikolai’s teal eyes widened.
I met the anxiety and fear in them.
I was anxious and afraid as well.
“Are you running away from me?”
He took a step forward, stifling explosive anger.
The wave of his scent hit me.
‘You’ll regret today, beating your chest — but no matter how you weep, you can’t turn back time.’
All I could manage was to push him away.
“You know the situation… Your Majesty?” I said.
“I don’t.”
“Don’t be stubborn.”
“You’re the stubborn one. No matter what, you cannot leave.”
Nikolai growled.
It sounded like an order, but it was a plea.
“Absolutely not. You belong to me.”
He was begging me not to go.
What should I do with this man?
With how much I wanted to own him.
“Your Majesty.”
Before I realized it, I reached out.
I looped my arms around his neck and rose onto my tiptoes.
I pressed my lips to his.
A tear traced down my cheek.
The third kiss tasted of tears.
