#45. The Qualities of an Empress
Nikolai didn’t answer.
In the heavy silence, I was the first to speak.
“Either Marquis Pipe or Count Blackfold. Maybe both.”
“Duke Rehman is a cautious man.”
“Marquis Brendan is eagerly waiting for the gamble. If we exclude those two, only Pipe and Blackfold remain.”
“I’m sorry. I should have dealt with it sooner.”
Nikolai dropped his head, looking ashamed.
He bit his lip with his white teeth, not realizing how indecently sensual that reddened mouth looked in that moment.
And I, too, couldn’t take my eyes off those lips.
“Why are you apologizing, Your Majesty? The ones using dirty tricks will only deny everything anyway.”
“If I had ruled the Empire perfectly, this never would have happened.”
“If it were that simple, the late Emperor would have solved everything himself.”
“?”
“Do you think you’re the only emperor troubled by noble lords? What, are you supposed to be a god?”
“Elizaveta…”
“In a feudal state like the Hartmann Empire, of course the lords hold influence.”
Reading novels teaches you a lot about power struggles.
And I wasn’t just any reader—I was an avid fan who knew this world’s original story inside and out.
The Emperor might appear to wield absolute power, but in reality, he didn’t.
Even Claudia, the original heroine, fell into danger several times because of the four great noble families.
They pretended to support her revolution, only to use her.
The moment Claudia executed the original Elizaveta and Nikolai, they revealed their true colors.
Their greed eventually brought about their own downfall.
If Claudia could do it, then so can I!
A confidence backed by reason filled me.
At first, when I possessed this body, everything had seemed hopeless.
I had no confidence to stand against Claudia, my favorite and the strongest female knight.
Twisting the story, avoiding the guillotine—it had all seemed impossible.
Every night, the fear returned in the form of nightmares.
But not anymore. I’m not alone now, am I?
Thanks to the kidnapping incident, Owen had completely turned to my side.
Convincing Boritz was only a matter of time.
Douglas and Susan would stand with me no matter what.
Prince Franz, though still young, and Minister of the Interior, Cares, couldn’t be overlooked either.
And most of all—
Nikolai, the most handsome man in the world, the most powerful figure in the Empire, was beside me.
Not a friend, not a lover, certainly not a husband.
But that he cherished me—I couldn’t deny.
“No matter how strong the enemy, I won’t give up. Persistence is the foundation of victory.”
Not everyone who endures wins.
Even with tenacity, if luck doesn’t favor you, failure is almost certain.
Sometimes, luck mattered more than effort.
But if you gave up, you erased even the smallest chance of fortune.
I won’t bow to Elizaveta’s fate. The original story can’t bind me. My life belongs to me.
For the first time, I desperately wanted to live.
Because now I had someone I wanted to protect.
“I didn’t know you studied politics,” Nikolai said in awe.
I scratched my cheek and pouted.
“I only picked things up here and there.”
“You possess remarkable qualities and talents. Even if you gathered all the noble ladies of the great houses, none would come close to you.”
“You flatter me.”
“I’ve met countless beauties and prodigies. Some were richer, some more elegant. But never one with boldness, wisdom, and honesty combined.”
The praise was unmatched, yet my throat burned as if I had swallowed a blade fresh from the forge.
That shadow I could never forget stabbed at the corner of my heart.
There were countless women around Nikolai.
Flowers waiting for the Emperor’s touch bloomed fragrantly in his harem.
And the man who ordered my kidnapping… surely it was the Empress’s father. The more Nikolai favors me, the more dangers will descend upon me.
I had no intention of running.
At least until Claudia was stopped, I had to remain by his side.
But after that?
Would I still be able to stay?
What am I to you, really? A target to seduce? A substitute for your first love? Or…
I couldn’t bring myself to ask.
I wasn’t sure I could bear the answer.
For now, I wanted only to hold onto his warm gaze, his gentle touch.
To savor this time, just the two of us, as if we were the only people in the world.
“And what qualities do you say I possess?”
“Well… that is…”
“You don’t mean… as Empress, do you?” I asked playfully.
Nikolai pressed his lips tight.
His wide green eyes trembled like willow leaves in a storm.
Even the air around him seemed to harden.
His cheeks are a little red… Did I put too many logs on the fire?
I glanced at the fireplace on the right wall.
The soft flames gave the room warmth.
If it wasn’t the heat—then why was he reacting like this?
Was it uncomfortable that I mentioned the Empress, even as a joke?
“Pretend you didn’t hear that. Ugh, Empress? Just imagining it makes me shudder.”
I exaggeratedly shook my shoulders.
The red in Nikolai’s face drained into a pale blue.
His lips parted slightly, as if suppressing a groan.
And then his question stunned me.
“Why would becoming Empress be such a dreadful thing?”
“Where in the world has there ever been a commoner Empress?”
“What if there was?”
“Then the whole nation would riot! They made a villainess the Empress? The Empire is doomed! The tyrant Emperor has gone mad!”
In the original story, Nikolai had tried to make Empress Elizaveta his Empress.
Protests erupted all across the Empire.
She wasn’t noble, her conduct was scandalous, she squandered state funds on luxury.
No wonder.
It was precisely this that made so many who were against the revolution flock to Claudia’s side.
Elizaveta’s coronation as Empress was a shortcut to the guillotine. Whatever happens, I must stop it.
Not that I needed to worry.
Nikolai would never make me Empress.
Still, I nailed it down.
“I’m sure you never thought of naming me Empress, but if by some chance you did—forget it. Unless you want the worst possible ending.”
“You are no villainess.”
“I’m still a commoner.”
“There are qualities more important than birth or bloodline.”
Nikolai’s tone turned bitter.
Was he really saying I had the qualities of an Empress?
My heart swelled despite myself.
Who dislikes being valued by the one they like?
But we were not meant to continue that way.
All my efforts would crumble, and likely our lives too.
“You heard me. I said I don’t want it.”
“…”
“If I became Empress, every day would be filled with assassination attempts. An Empress without backing or power has no happy ending.”
“…”
“And I believe marriage should be with one person you promise your life to. Only then can there be happiness.”
So I had to rein in my heart, which was tilting dangerously toward Nikolai.
Back to the seduction game, back to the contract.
Let’s remember only these fleeting moments.
Even if they vanish, don’t regret.
Like leaves falling when winter comes, accept the day when it ends.
I told myself this again and again, yet my eyes kept seeking Nikolai.
“I understand what you mean,” he whispered.
I was the one who pushed him away.
Yet hearing his quiet acceptance, the strength drained out of me.
The mood grew rough and scratchy, like sand rolling inside my mouth.
I fiddled with the silk gown and asked,
“Where are my clothes?”
“They were soiled with blood and sweat. I discarded them.”
“I want to wash. I sweated a lot.”
“I thought so. I wiped you with a wet towel. For now, you should avoid bathing.”
“You say that as if you did it yourself?”
I asked suspiciously.
Nikolai lifted his chin proudly.
“Who else would, if not me?”
“What?!”
“I cleaned your wounds with antiseptic. I changed your clothes too.”
“Why?”
“Would you rather show your bare body to anyone else?”
How could this man be so shameless!
No wonder they called him a womanizer!
My face burned again, my heart thumping dangerously.
I hurled a feather pillow at his face.
“You… you wolf!”
Though night had deepened, Douglas could not sleep.
When Elizaveta was kidnapped, I did nothing.
A tidal wave of bitter helplessness and guilt swept over him.
Even upon hearing she had been rescued, he couldn’t rejoice freely.
She had been injured, they said.
Before anything irreversible happened, it was Nikolai who saved her.
Whenever Douglas closed his eyes, he saw that vision: Nikolai charging forward on horseback, fearless and commanding.
The man was infamous as a libertine, but Douglas trusted his own judgment over idle gossip.
Nikolai carried the dignity and majesty only the nobly born could possess.
In short, he had the overwhelming aura that subdued others and ruled them as if it were his birthright.
And he was the only swordsman who could stand as an equal to the genius knight, Claudia.
He is also unbearably beautiful—too much for mere words. To feel inferior to His Majesty is absurd. And yet…
Nikolai had never hidden his hostility toward Douglas.
Because Douglas was Elizaveta’s former fiancé.
Though Elizaveta only regarded him as a friend, Nikolai never let down his guard.
As if he could see straight through Douglas’s heart and its unspoken devotion.
But I cannot give up. If she stays with His Majesty, Elizaveta will only know misery. What she needs is a man who understands her completely.
If she had never entered the palace, if she had never drawn the Emperor’s gaze, she would never have been kidnapped.
She would have been freer, safer.
But Nikolai was no ordinary man.
He already had wives—including the empresses from the four great houses.
Even if Elizaveta and Nikolai truly loved each other, their path would be covered in thorns.
Douglas pulled a small copper key from his pocket.
He had never parted from it since that day.
Carrying a lantern, he walked to his study.
Not even Susan entered here without permission.
With the copper key, Douglas opened a locked desk drawer.
Inside lay an old book.
“If I were given another life… I’d want to change completely. Just like the main character of this book…”
Elizaveta had given it to him during a fever, gasping for breath.
The author’s name wasn’t written.
Nor was there any sign of when it had been published.
When Douglas asked, Elizaveta gave no answer.
Only those words—another life—remained etched in his memory.
