Chapter 75
After the orphanage was gone, there had been a time when I suffered from a high fever like this.
Back then, I had no money to go to the hospital, so I had no choice but to lie in pain in the corner of a small room I had temporarily rented in a goshiwon. Even then, I had to stifle my groans because the person in the next room kept pounding on the wall, saying I was being noisy.
Back then, it wasn’t the pain that hurt most, but the loneliness.
Compared to that, now was much better. I had a warm, safe place, and I didn’t need to suppress my illness.
“Cough, cough! Hhh…”
Overtaken by another fit of coughing, I curled up and pressed my eyes shut.
And I tried to sleep—hoping that when I woke, I’d feel at least a little better.
I faintly opened my eyes at the sound of movement outside the door, then rolled my gaze to check the clock.
Jack’s class must be over.
Sure enough, I could hear Leonard’s voice beyond the door.
I wanted to at least see him off, but with my condition, I couldn’t risk spreading illness. I gave up and closed my eyes again.
Soon I fell back into sleep.
“…the fever… has gone down…”
I don’t know how long I had slept when I heard a voice nearby and hazily opened my eyes.
Who…?
A dark figure sat at my bedside. It was night, and my vision was blurry, so I couldn’t make out who it was.
But there was a faint, pleasant scent—something that cleared my head.
I never lit incense. Where was this fragrance coming from?
“Hoyun…?”
Thinking that, I murmured the name of the one most likely watching over me.
But—
“You’re awake.”
…It’s not Hoyun.
The voice was completely different. And as my eyes adjusted, I could tell the silhouette was nothing like Hoyun’s.
Who…?
“Your fever’s gone down a lot, but don’t overdo it. You should sleep more.”
Ah. I knew.
There was only one person with that tone, that voice.
“Your Grace…?”
“That’s right.”
Wow. It’s really Duke Creyman.
For a moment, I wondered if I was dreaming. I raised my hand with effort and tried to pinch my cheek.
…Nothing. My hand was too weak to feel a thing.
Then this must be a dream.
It made sense.
The duke wouldn’t possibly be here.
Judging from the window, it was the dead of night. There was no way the duke would be here at such an hour.
So it’s a dream.
Once I decided it was a dream, my tension eased. I relaxed and closed my eyes.
“…How strange.”
“What is?”
He replied to my mutter.
I peeked my eyes open again. Now that my vision had adjusted, I could see him better.
How didn’t I notice sooner?
Those brilliant golden eyes… there was only one man in the world with such dazzling eyes—the duke.
I smiled softly at him.
It was just a dream, but still.
“Because it’s Your Grace.”
“…Are you disappointed it’s me?”
“No. On the contrary—seeing Your Grace’s face makes me feel like I’m healing.”
They say beauty soothes the spirit.
That was exactly what was happening now. His radiance was so overwhelming I even forgot my sickness for a moment.
At my words, the duke closed his lips. I wondered what expression he wore, but I couldn’t see because he turned his head away.
Ah—his hair’s sticking up.
Instead, I noticed something else: the back of his hair was sticking out.
This happened before too… when was it?
Oh, right. When the emperor’s messenger had been rude. He had just arrived in the capital then, and his appearance was unusually unkempt.
With hazy eyes, I reached out toward him.
“…Siela?”
When I touched the stray lock of his hair, the duke looked at me in shock.
Normally, I would never dare, but in my dazed state—and since this was a dream—I grew bold.
“Your hair… is sticking up.”
I smoothed it down gently, and I saw his eyes widen.
“Oh, your face turned red.”
I grinned.
“Si-Siela…”
“Your Grace, you’re cuter than I thought.”
“…”
The duke pressed his lips together, staring at me.
How strange.
My condition had been terrible, but now, chatting and laughing with him, I felt as if I were getting better.
Then I noticed his hand adjusting my blanket.
Such big hands…
And covered with scars.
I didn’t know what I was thinking, only that I suddenly wanted to hold his hand. I had the conviction that those hands could protect me.
“May I… hold your hand?”
“…”
The duke looked startled at my words.
Strangely, I was seeing so many of his expressions tonight.
Was it because this was a dream? If so, then were those expressions born of my imagination?
But they looked far too natural for that.
“…You don’t want me to?”
I gazed up at him with pleading eyes. After a moment’s hesitation, he shook his head.
“…I don’t mind.”
Then he took my hand—no, it was more accurate to say his large hand covered mine completely.
“Your hand is so cool, it feels nice.”
His temperature was low, cooling my fevered body.
I closed my eyes.
“…Will you stay with me until I fall asleep again?”
Since this was a dream, I feared he might vanish any moment.
But when he didn’t reply right away, I cautiously opened my eyes.
Had he already gone?
No—he was still there, watching me.
When our eyes met, he slowly opened his lips.
“Alright.”
A voice as gentle as a lullaby followed.
“I’ll stay by your side, so sleep easy.”
His tone, tender like one speaking to a child, made me smile naturally.
He softly patted the back of my hand.
Feeling his touch, I closed my eyes again. Strangely, as soon as I did, sleep overtook me once more.
I drifted deeper into slumber, thinking:
When I wake again, I hope he’s still here.
But when I awoke, the duke was gone.
A full week passed before I was finally able to get out of bed.
Ugh, I’m so weak.
All I’d eaten were medicine and porridge—and most of that I’d thrown up. The moment my feet touched the floor, my legs trembled.
“Shouldn’t you rest a little longer?”
Hoyun asked with a worried face, but I shook my head.
There must be so much orphanage work piled up, and I had to discuss the competition with Leonard too. More than anything…
I’m bored out of my mind.
Truly, for the whole week in bed, I had been like a half-dead corpse, unable to move. Whenever I tried, Hoyun would rush over and stop me.
She meant well, but still.
It was too much.
“I’m really fine.”
I answered quickly before she could stop me again.
Though still uneasy, she finally gave way after I even showed her I could jump in place.
First thing, I need a walk. It’s been too long.
I felt stifled after a week indoors.
But the moment I opened the door, the children rushed at me, knocking me over.
“Ow…”
“Chloen, you’re heavy…”
“Ren! Are you okay? Did you get hurt?”
“Director!”
Stunned by the sudden chaos, I just stood there blankly until Roddy came running.
He threw himself into my arms and looked up at me.
“You’re not sick anymore?”
Snapping back to my senses, I nodded and smiled.
“Yes, I’m fine now. But what were you all doing here?”
I asked the most mature-looking one, Ren, but it was Hoyun who answered.
“They’ve been staging a protest all week, demanding to see you at least once.”
“We said we just wanted to check your condition, but Hoyun wouldn’t listen!”
Chloen complained, and Hoyun scoffed.
“The order was that no one but me could enter.”
She even looked proud of it.
The funniest part was how Chloen, unable to retort, just trembled with frustration.
Watching them, I suddenly burst out laughing.
“Hahaha.”
My unexpected laughter drew wide-eyed stares from the children and Hoyun.
“What’s so funny?”
Chloen asked with a scowl, and I wiped the tears from my eyes as I replied.
“No reason. I’m just… happy.”
