Chapter 94
“Huff, huff.”
Shanelika awoke, gasping for breath. It wasn’t because of just another dream she had been having repeatedly for some time.
This wasn’t a dream.
It was a memory.
“Whew…”
She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself.
These past few days, Shanelika had been forced to relive memories she desperately wanted to forget—memories that came to her in the form of dreams. That day in the cave, when she was brutally tortured by Stern.
The fear brought on by that mysterious necklace had been dominating her for days.
Eleusis had tried to find out who placed the necklace in her room, but no suspicious person was discovered. Fortunately, the necklace itself contained no harmful substance, and Eleusis brushed it off, telling her not to worry since nothing had happened.
But Shanelika only grew more terrified with each passing day. The necklace had lit the fuse of a fear she had almost managed to bury.
She had been enduring her remaining time as a hatchling with the thought that, once she became an adult dragon, she would never be helpless against Stern again. She reassured herself that, until then, she was safe because Lord—inhabiting the human shell of Derwin—was always by her side.
But now, all of that felt meaningless. It was as if the unbreakable shield she had trusted had been shattered to pieces.
She couldn’t stop imagining: what if that necklace had been coated with something meant to harm dragons?
The thought alone left her anxious and terrified. She couldn’t sleep properly, couldn’t eat well. When exhaustion finally forced her to close her eyes, memories would come rushing back even while she was awake, like vivid dreams.
And still, her queenly lessons continued as usual.
Her body and mind were exhausted, but Shanelika refused to show weakness to Eleusis or anyone else. Since she was destined to be queen, she didn’t want to give the nobles—who already looked for any excuse to belittle her—another reason to do so.
Knock, knock.
“Lady Shanel, it’s time for your history lesson.”
So it was time for the afternoon lecture. Thankfully, she had woken up before the professor arrived.
Soon after, the history professor entered with two guards.
“Then I’ll take my leave.”
Three tedious hours of history ended. Shanelika, unable to concentrate, had been scolded multiple times. But it couldn’t be helped. How could she focus when she hadn’t eaten or slept properly?
And it wasn’t only that—her scattered attention was drawn elsewhere too.
The professor sat with his back to the door. Shanelika faced him from across the table, which meant she could clearly see the two guards by the door: Derwin and Wils. Whenever she lifted her head from her book, there they were.
Wils, not originally a guard, often slacked off—especially during her queen lessons. He would doze off or get lost in thought, leaving everything to Derwin. Today was no exception.
But it was Derwin who weighed on Shanelika’s mind. She couldn’t help noticing his gaze. She could feel it, sharp and steady, fixed on her.
Not just today, but for the past several days, she had felt that Derwin was watching her more carefully than usual.
She tried to ignore it. Life was hard enough as it was. The constant fear pressed down on her, and seeing Derwin only added confusion and turmoil. Paying attention to him only made everything worse.
When the professor and guards finally left, Shanelika collapsed face-first onto her bed. She had no strength left. She just wanted to rest without thinking. But she knew the moment her consciousness slipped, the memories of that cave would return, cloaked as dreams.
—Ashanerbekirael.
Just as her mind began to blur from fatigue, a voice echoed inside her head.
Lord.
Her first reaction was aversion.
Since that drunken night, she had been avoiding Derwin completely. Not only because of the embarrassment, but because his very presence unsettled her more than anything else. She didn’t even want to speak to him.
—Hatchling.
When she ignored him, Derwin called her again. Twice now—clearly not just to talk at her. He must have placed a telepathic spell on her during class.
—Casting spells without permission, speaking without permission… Don’t you think both are wrong?
Her reply was sharp, though he couldn’t even see her face from outside the door.
—What’s the problem?
—Both are problems.
—No. I mean the reason you’re struggling now.
At his words, something welled up inside her.
How could he know? She thought no one had noticed.
—So that’s why you kept staring at me?
—Answer.
—I’m fine. Nothing’s wrong.
—A lie means nothing to a bonded mate.
Bonded. What a ridiculous word.
But Derwin didn’t seem inclined to back off.
—Why does it matter to you?
—Have you forgotten why I’m here?
—Ah yes, the great Lord staying here to protect the foolish, naïve hatchling.
Her words dripped with sarcasm.
—Then answer. What’s the problem?
—And if I do? Will you fix it for me?
—Answer.
Burying her face in the pillow, she sighed.
She was tired. What was the point? Lord wouldn’t solve it. Still, maybe now was the right time to speak. After all, he had started the conversation.
—Fine. Don’t interrupt me. Listen until I finish.
Not that she expected him to fix anything.
Derwin gave no response, which she took as agreement. She gathered her thoughts and began.
—Someone placed an unknown object among the king’s gifts. I thought it came from His Majesty himself. But it didn’t. Fortunately, nothing happened while I had it with me. But something could have. That thought won’t leave me alone.
No reaction from Derwin. She continued.
—You probably don’t want to hear this, but I need to say it. Call me a stupid hatchling who can’t even separate reality from play if you want. Before you regained your dragon memories, I was kidnapped by a man named Stern. He came from a family of dragon-slayers, studied dragons for generations. His goal was to force a dragon into its true form, butcher it, and sell its body parts. That’s why I was taken.
She had always wanted to say it. That the scars and pain of that day were still raw. And now, she said it before the mighty dragon Lord who dismissed past “play” as meaningless.
—When I was captured, Stern tortured me with a special powder that only worked on dragons. I don’t know what it was, but it nearly drove me insane. You could never imagine how agonizing it was.
Even recalling it in thought sent chills down her body. Her arms began trembling.
—That’s my answer. The strange item in my room—what if Stern’s powder, or some substance that harms only dragons, was used on it? I might not have survived. That’s what terrifies me.
But she kept her tone as steady as she could, not wanting to sound weak.
—That’s all I have to say. Are you satisfied?
—So you’re this weak over something so trivial? When nothing even happened?
At his words, she almost laughed—not out of humor, but bitter despair. For her, it was terror beyond words. For him, it was nothing but “trivial.”
—You’re right. Nothing happened. But it could happen. That’s what frightens me.
Even as she explained, she knew it was useless. How could Lord, with his immense power and nothing to fear in this world, ever understand the dread she carried?
—Nothing will happen. So snap out of it.
He spoke as if to a child. At that, suppressed resentment broke free.
—If you hadn’t denied your human past, maybe I wouldn’t be so afraid now.
—What do you mean?
—If you were still the human Derwin, you’d already be hunting Stern down. Because he’s the one who did this to me.
Her breath grew shallow. She pushed herself off the bed, staggering toward the table by the window to get some water.
—But instead, you’ve denied it all. And here you are, just passing the time beside me.
—I’m fulfilling my duty.
—Really? Then as Lord, for the sake of your hatchling, will you eliminate Stern right now? He’s the one who harmed me in the past and still makes me live in fear.
She drank water—one sip, two, three, four, five. Only after setting the cup down did his reply come.
—The Hatchling Protection Law only covers the scope of protection. It does not demand punishment of those who harmed hatchlings, nor does it require eliminating what causes them fear. It only requires dragons to shield hatchlings from threats.
Shanelika gave a dry laugh. She hadn’t expected more.
—What a fine law. All show, no substance.
His answer, ironically, brought clarity. For the first time, her tangled feelings fell into place. She came to a decision.
—I have something to say to you now.
Her strength was failing, so she leaned against the table.
—Your duty to guard me ends today. From tomorrow, I don’t want to see your face again.
