<11>
As always, morning arrived quietly. Delsia rose from her seat, bathed in the sunlight pouring into the room. She blinked her stiff eyes, unsure how to place her feet, when just then Ella knocked on the door.
“Miss, are you awake? I came to help you get ready.”
“Mm. Come in, Ella.”
At Delsia’s words, Ella cautiously opened the door and stepped inside. The sunlight flooded the room, and Delsia, sitting in the bright rays, came into Ella’s view. Perhaps because the sunlight was so strong, Delsia looked even worse than usual, and Ella couldn’t help but bite her lower lip.
It had been like this ever since she had seen Duke Adelio at the coffee house yesterday.
Suppressing her worry, Ella took Delsia’s hands and helped her to rise. Delsia, straightening her back, tried to take each step on her own. But her efforts often faltered; she swayed, hesitated, and sometimes had to stop entirely.
“It’s okay. It’s okay, Ella.”
Delsia reassured the startled Ella and took another step. This time, with Ella supporting her firmly, she was able to walk steadily. Panting from the effort, Delsia finally sat before her dressing table, and Ella continued her careful ministrations.
Ella gently wiped Delsia’s face with a cloth dampened in warm water. Once her face was clean, she braided Delsia’s hair. On any ordinary day, Delsia would have smiled brightly, chatting happily about her hair.
But today, she said nothing. She showed no reaction, merely staring into the mirror like a living corpse, her pupils empty.
“Miss…”
“Yes, Ella? Did you call me?”
Delsia lifted the corners of her mouth slightly as she replied, and Ella shook her head gently. She had only called out because seeing her mistress like this pained her. Muttering to herself, she lowered her gaze.
Though Delsia was there, it felt as if she wasn’t really present—the life in her eyes was completely gone.
After finishing Delsia’s grooming, Ella helped her to her feet and opened the bedroom door. Supporting her mistress carefully, she led her downstairs. Delsia’s labored breathing reached Ella’s ears.
Ella wanted to stop immediately to check on her, but Delsia refused.
“I-it’s fine. Keep going. Just keep going.”
Nodding, Ella led her to the dining room, where Delsia finally seated herself at the table. The Earl of Ferdo, looking at his daughter with troubled eyes, asked:
“Delsi, how are you feeling?”
“…I’m fine.”
“That’s a relief, then.”
Delsia muttered “fine” out of habit, and the Earl nodded. Though he had countless questions swirling in his mind, he swallowed them and chose his words carefully.
“Delsi… about the outing you went on yesterday…”
“Yes.”
“Nothing happened… during that outing, right?”
Memories flashed of herself waiting for Edwin, of Edwin not recognizing her when their eyes met. Hastily pushing away the bittersweet recollection, Delsia nodded absentmindedly. The Earl glanced at Ella, who stood behind Delsia with a worried expression, seeking confirmation. Ella nodded in response.
Delsia set down her utensils and wiped her mouth, then alternately looked at her father and her brother. The rest of the family paused, sensing the emptiness in her gaze, and focused on her.
“Father… I have something to say. I… want to go to Edwin.”
“Oh, Delsi…”
“It’s not because I would suffer or feel as though I might die if Edwin isn’t there.”
Catching her breath, Delsia squinted her eyes and composed herself.
“I want to go… for me. For my own sake.”
“What do you mean, Delsi?”
“Delsia… you can barely even speak properly—what are you saying?”
The Earl and Arnold looked stunned, unable to respond, but Delsia quickly added:
“I want to make the effort I can… because I want to.”
“What effort? What do you mean?”
The Earl could not raise his voice at his exhausted daughter. Delsia looked up at him and answered steadily:
“An effort I won’t regret…”
“Delsia…”
“I know it sounds absurd… but I want to watch over Edwin, to see that he’s okay.”
The Earl squeezed his eyes shut and turned away. How could he answer his daughter, who might not even live for another year… How could he send her to the house of Duke Adelio? He sighed deeply, torn.
Seeing him hesitate, Arnold spoke carefully:
“Delsia… don’t you care about your own condition? You’ve been talking about Duke Adelio this whole time.”
“It’s hard now, but I believe… I believe I’ll be okay.”
“I believe you’ll be okay…”
Arnold, watching Delsia with downcast eyes, repeated her words and lowered his head. How wonderful it would be if her body truly recovered—if only he could believe that too.
But he knew it wasn’t true. He couldn’t lie to himself, so his eyes were inevitably sad.
And yet, he couldn’t reveal the truth outright. Any shock might worsen Delsia’s condition.
The Earl, struggling as well, exhaled heavily and finally told her the truth he had been hiding.
“Delsi… the truth is, there’s a problem with you.”
“…What?”
“According to the witch, the artificial magic heart isn’t compatible with your magic.”
Delsia’s eyes widened in disbelief. How could it be that the artificial heart, which rarely failed to match anyone, wasn’t compatible with her magic? It was impossible.
Only when she saw her father’s pupils trembling with unease did she realize the truth of his words.
Incompatibility meant her heart could stop at any moment. Delsia recalled what Vianna had once told her and bit her lower lip.
Her lips quivered as she struggled to speak. Finally, her eyes closed. An indescribable turmoil swirled inside her.
Ah, my mind is going blank… Everything feels like a dream. It must be a dream. Otherwise, Edwin wouldn’t be reaching out at the very edge of my closed vision. Transparent, burning tears streamed down Delsia’s face.
The drops fell onto her pale hands, but she didn’t think to wipe them, only hung her head.
She had lied to her family, persuaded them, saved Edwin on her own… and now her reward was merely death. She couldn’t even summon a laugh.
Tears, long thought dried, dampened the hem of her dress.
In this state, countless thoughts filled her mind. The first and most persistent was that the happy future she dreamed of with Edwin had crumbled.
The future that had been full of happiness and excitement, the vague hope that Edwin would someday regain his memory and find her…
She felt powerless in the face of the fact that her life was limited.
“Delsi… are you okay…?”
“…Yes.”
Delsia could only say she was okay. Everything had resulted from her own selfish choices, and she had to endure it. She forced a smile onto her pale, terrified face.
Thus ended breakfast. Ella helped Delsia up, bowing to the Earl and Arnold.
“Father.”
“Yes, Delsi.”
“Please… be careful on your outing.”
“I will.”
The Earl of Ferdo smiled faintly at the thought that Delsia remembered her outing and watched as she left the dining room, supported by Ella.
Seeing his daughter teetering precariously, he felt a sting in his eyes. When she nearly lost her balance, he almost ran forward to catch her, forgetting his dignity as the head of the family.
Clenching his fists and suppressing his emotions, the Earl exhaled deeply. The more he wished she would stay by his side, even in such a fragile state, the more his heart ached.
“Father.”
“Yes.”
“About what Delsia said.”
“You mean that she wants to go to the house of Duke Adelio?”
“Yes.”
Arnold nodded and asked:
“What will you do?”
Pressing his temples, the Earl replied:
“…I must make a decision that no one will regret.”
At his words, Arnold’s expression grew equally serious.
