~Chapter 44~
“Where’s the Count?”
I was finally rested and walked into the dining room for dinner, then stopped in surprise.
At the table, only the Duke was sitting. The Alnor Count and his people were gone, and even our own staff were missing.
The Duke answered my confused look.
“The Alnor Count said he had urgent business and went back.”
“But just a moment ago, he said he wanted to stay for a few days and tour Lombard. Why did he suddenly leave? Did you do something wrong, Your Grace?”
“Of course not.”
The Duke smiled quietly, like he’d just heard a bad joke.
Well, northern nobles would do anything to get close to the Duke of Lombard, ruler of the North.
If someone like the Count left suddenly, something serious must have happened.
What should I do now?
Since the dinner was pointless now, I could just leave.
But if I left, it might look like I was trying to avoid being alone with the Duke.
It would look like I was running away like a scared animal.
That would hurt my pride.
I didn’t want to eat alone with the Duke at all, but still—I wasn’t afraid of him!
While I was hesitating, Bertolt came out from the servants’ passage.
“You’re here, madam.”
“Bertolt.”
“Dinner is ready. Please have a seat.”
Bertolt smiled and pulled out the chair for me, right across from the Duke.
If the Duke had sat at the head of the table like usual, it would have been easier. But now I had to face him directly at a narrow table. It was awkward.
Why did he leave the top seat empty and come down to sit closer? We’re not that friendly.
“Madam?”
“Oh, yes.”
They both waited for me as I stood there, blank.
I wasn’t happy, but I was hungry, so I sat down to eat anyway.
When the butler waved, the servants brought out the food.
But the menu was unexpected.
“I heard you haven’t had much appetite lately. So we prepared something easy to eat.”
“….”
“What do you think?”
Bertolt carefully watched my reaction.
It was a simple dinner—warm vegetable stew on a plain white plate, with some freshly baked rye bread and thin slices of meat.
It looked plain, but you could tell someone cared.
Strange…
I pushed down the feeling that suddenly rose in me.
Because these were foods I used to love in my previous life.
While I stared at the table, the old butler hurried to speak.
“If you don’t like it, we can get something else…”
“No, it’s fine. I like it.”
“Ah, that’s a relief.”
Bertolt smiled, clearly pleased.
“The master chose tonight’s menu himself. He remembered you liked simple home-cooked meals at the monastery…”
“Bertolt.”
“Sorry, madam.”
At the Duke’s short warning, Bertolt shut up right away. But he couldn’t hide the strange, knowing smile in his eyes.
It was a bit unsettling as I picked up my spoon, but I decided not to worry about it.
There’s no way the Duke would pay this much attention to my tastes—Berry must have told him.
Ever since I came back to Lombard Castle with Berry, the meals had changed to match my preferences—simple home food instead of greasy, buttery dishes.
Ah, the sad fate of a maid…
Bertolt taking credit for Berry’s work, and the Duke playing along—these were situations I knew too well from my own time as a servant.
I gave the Duke a resentful look without realizing it.
Don’t worry, Berry—I know this is all your doing.
But even while I felt annoyed, I couldn’t stop eating.
Every now and then, I felt a little choked up, but it was probably just because I was eating too fast.
“No one’s going to take your food. You can eat slowly.”
“I- I’m not being greedy! I’m just hungry. That’s all.”
The Duke offered me water at the perfect moment.
Maybe he sensed something was off, so I quickly took the glass and changed the subject.
“By the way, I’m glad the lawsuit worked out. Thank you for your hard work.”
“It’s thanks to your efforts, madam.”
“I don’t know about that. All I hear is people complaining about me.”
“There are always people who make noise. Don’t let it bother you. Any time you do the right thing, people talk.”
“I didn’t expect you to say that.”
I put down my fork and looked at the Duke.
I did it without thinking.
He looked back at me calmly, as usual, but suddenly stood up and reached toward me.
His long, strong fingers touched my cheek.
“Your Grace?”
“…Ah.”
Edwin was embarrassed.
He’d only met her gaze for a moment, but somehow reached out without realizing.
Just like the old days, when they were close as friends.
What am I doing?
The food, the casual talk, and the way they looked at each other—all of it brought back memories.
Even though things had changed, the warmth was just like long ago, and her eyes always made him crumble inside.
Only now did he realize he’d acted impulsively, swept up by the moment.
“You have some stew on your cheek.”
“Huh?”
“Right here.”
Was his mind finally falling apart after all he’d been through?
Edwin tried to move away slowly, hoping Elicia wouldn’t notice anything strange.
As expected, she exploded.
“Don’t you know how to treat a lady? Even if it’s just us, do you really have to point it out?!”
“Wouldn’t it be worse to find out later when you go to your room?”
“No matter how much you dislike me, you never let me win an argument. Bertolt!”
Elicia rubbed her cheek angrily, looking for a mirror.
Bertolt ran over, handing her a small mirror and looking at Edwin with a questioning look.
What did you say to make things so awkward?
He didn’t say it, but his eyes made it clear.
Bertolt had been working hard to bring the two of us closer as a couple.
He meant well, but…
That’s not going to happen.
Edwin gave a small smile.
He didn’t feel worthy of getting close to Elicia.
He couldn’t save her before; he was the one who drove her to her death. How could he face her like before?
But he was still grateful—a miracle, not God’s grace, had allowed him to see her again, and as her husband, to protect her without caring what others thought.
That was enough for him.
But no matter how hard he tried, his feelings kept slipping out.
It’s hard to fight this anxiety.
It probably started when Elicia took poison and didn’t tell anyone.
He’d always had things under control, but if anything happened to her when he wasn’t looking…
If he failed to protect her again…
His broken mind was being eaten by fear.
Even though he wasn’t worthy, he kept circling around her. Watching her sleep, he finally slept peacefully for the first time in ages.
Whenever he saw her, he felt both joy and guilt.
It hurt.
Ah, it hurt.
It was like being a starving wanderer, seeing a forbidden fruit in the blazing desert.
“Your Grace, are you listening?!”
“Of course.”
Edwin snapped out of his thoughts.
He kept his perfect Duke’s face, hiding all the darkness inside.
Elicia, getting his attention, started talking again.
“So, could I borrow some of the castle’s workers? I want to check out the land I just bought.”
“No.”
“What?!”
She clearly expected him to say yes.
And she wasn’t wrong.
For anything else, he would have agreed.
But she needed to understand how much the people of the estate cared about her.
She’d been hurt too many times by hoping for things and being let down.
“You don’t need my help for this.”
