Chapter 5
“First Love Has Returned”
I froze for a moment. Even amidst the chaos of daily life, there was one name I had never once forgotten.
Arthur had returned.
“Adeline?”
I composed myself at the slightly puzzled voice of Irin and spoke quietly.
“Let him in.”
Arthur entered, dressed in a black short frock coat over a shirt, with black trousers—a sign of mourning, perhaps. He held the hat he had been wearing in his hand and gave me a polite bow. It was the first courteous greeting I had received from him since the small ball in town.
A year ago, Arthur had been drafted and sent to the northern front.
Even while in the army, he had written me letters diligently, so he must have thought it strange that I hadn’t replied for several months. Many letters arrived full of worry, but I could not respond. After all, I was already dead.
Holding the last letter, in which he said he would return after his service and wished to see me, I wept for a long while before ultimately writing my own death notice.
The moment he returned home, it seemed he had come to see me immediately.
“Hello… I’m Arthur Morris. I am a friend of Pieni… Pieni Everdeen, who was your maid. I’ve just heard of her passing, and I came to pay my respects.”
‘Pieni Everdeen’—that was my real name. I had believed I was the only person left in the world who knew it… yet there it was, spilling from Arthur’s lips. Tears threatened to fall.
Seeing my silence, Arthur fiddled nervously with his hat, glanced at me, and froze in place.
Arthur had never been able to hide his emotions.
Whenever we played tag, ten times out of ten, I always won.
“You’re impossible to beat, Pieni. Maybe I should practice keeping a poker face.”
He had said things like that, so I always read his expressions and guessed his feelings.
Arthur blinked rapidly, first startled, then flustered, as if to deny what he felt. The poker face had evidently not been learned.
‘That expression… he thinks I look too much like Pieni,’ I realized.
I lowered my voice slightly and opened my mouth.
“I’m sorry I sent the death notice a bit late. I was… preoccupied.”
“No… no, it’s… it’s fine…”
Even as he spoke, Arthur could not tear his eyes from me. I, too, stared quietly at him. Over the year, he had grown more mature than I expected.
The warm brown hair falling across his forehead, the soft gray eyes in his slightly downturned gaze—everything remained the same. Yet, as a boy in the middle of his growth spurt, he had shot up in height. There was a time when I had been taller than him…
His face still held the softness of youth, but his body had grown solid. Perhaps because he had rushed over in his old clothes, the sleeves of his coat were tight, showing the firm muscles of his arms, and the shirt stretched slightly over his chest. Now, he was nearly twice my size.
‘This is… Arthur.’
Arthur was my friend, my brother, my sibling, my… first love. Had I continued living as Pieni, I would likely have married him.
From the age of five, when my family moved next door, Arthur and I were inseparable. When scolded by my mother, or fleeing my adoptive father’s punishments, I always sought Arthur. We ran through every alley in the neighborhood together, sharing even a single piece of bread given by a neighbor.
“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing left of Pieni’s belongings. Her father took everything, but he recently passed away in an accident.”
Hearing my own name from my mouth felt strangely alien. Arthur’s face twisted in despair.
“Nothing… nothing at all…?”
“I didn’t expect this… I couldn’t prepare anything in advance. I’m sorry.”
His gray eyes filled with tears almost immediately. Arthur had always expressed himself freely, and now, the grown man before me was sobbing like a child.
“Pieni…”
I rose, sat him on a single-seat sofa, and pulled a handkerchief from my desk drawer. It was one I had embroidered to relieve stress after tedious etiquette lessons—a white base with green gemstone patterns. ‘Pieni’ meant ‘gemstone.’ I had stitched it thinking of my name, given by my mother who said my green eyes were like jewels.
I handed the handkerchief to Arthur.
“I forgot about this. Pieni embroidered it herself. If it’s alright, please take it.”
Arthur alternated his gaze between the handkerchief and me, tears still streaming down.
“Pieni… embroidered this? You couldn’t do things like this before… truly… thank you…”
He held it as if it were Pieni herself and brushed his tears away with the back of his hand.
“But… miss, if I may be frank, you really resemble Pieni. That’s why I couldn’t help but cry.”
I wasn’t surprised. I replied naturally.
“I’ve heard that a lot. That’s why we got along like sisters. I hope it comforts you. By the way, since you’re only hearing the news now, where have you been? What are you doing now?”
Arthur fell right into my casual questioning.
“I originally worked in a store, then was drafted. I haven’t done anything yet since returning a few days ago.”
Even as he spoke, his hands caressed the handkerchief.
I pulled the cord by my desk to ring the bell. Irin entered.
“Yes, Adeline?”
“Call the house steward.”
Soon the steward arrived, bowing respectfully.
“Miss, did you call?”
‘I’ll give him a generous allowance and a small compensation.’
I had planned to say that, but instead, out came something else:
“My bodyguard-cum-porter position is empty, right? I’d like to recommend him.”
Both the steward and Arthur’s eyes widened. The steward coughed into his fist a couple of times before speaking.
“The position is vacant, but he would need a formal interview for employment.”
“I already interviewed him. We were short-handed during the last shopping trip, and the porter from the kitchen came along, didn’t he?”
In truth, it had been the steward who offered me a bodyguard-porter, and I had postponed it because one stranger wandering the house was enough with Lord Lawrence around. But I was stubborn; I wanted Arthur by my side.
“I… I’m fine. I can just work as a storehand again, like before.”
‘A lie.’
His expression said otherwise. I knew logically I should send him away—to let him forget Pieni and start a new life. But my heart had its own mind. My heart wanted to be near him.
“If you wish it, miss, I will do as you say.”
The steward bowed and gestured for Arthur to rise. Arthur collected his hat and handkerchief, bowed to me, and followed the steward.
I sat in the place he had been, letting out a deep sigh.
Just as I closed my eyes to rest, there was a knock, and the door flew open. Lord Lawrence had come.
“Adel! You hired a bodyguard? What’s this about?”
“Ah… it’s done.”
“Done? You didn’t even consult me! I’ve never met this person before.”
I smiled faintly, trying to soothe him.
“He’s a friend of my former maid. I’ve heard about him a few times, so I know what kind of person he is.”
“Hearing stories doesn’t tell you everything! I could protect you! Am I not enough?”
‘Oh dear…’
I stifled a sigh and covered it with a smile.
“Lawrence, you’ll be busy with the knights now. And you can’t carry bags while shopping. I needed more than a bodyguard—I needed a porter.”
He immediately calmed down.
“Well, if you personally think he’s trustworthy, fine. But if he misbehaves, tell me immediately. I won’t forgive him.”
I chuckled at his childish jealousy. Between Arthur sobbing earlier and Lawrence being possessively jealous, why were the men around me so childlike?
After nearly a week of flitting around the estate post-ball, Lord Lawrence returned to the Ridenhart estate for his knightly duties.
I felt slightly sad, like a cat leaving, but the relief of not having to be on edge every moment was stronger.
“You’ll be busy with the knights, so you can’t come often. But I’ll write every day. I’ll miss you. What should I do? Our Adel.”
Even from the carriage, Lawrence leaned out to caress my cheek, making my toes curl. I smiled, prepared for just such a moment, and waved him off.
Arthur adapted to life in the estate surprisingly well.
More than a bodyguard, he was like a jack-of-all-trades around the house. Even after just a few days, people were already seeking him everywhere.
Though he had no protection duties at the estate, Arthur had always been competent at everything.
Watching him work became a small hobby of mine.
Peering out the library window, I saw him moving stones in the garden, wearing only the white shirt and trousers of a laborer.
Under the bright sun, the sweat glimmered along his muscular arms.
He must have noticed me looking, for his gray eyes met mine directly. I quickly looked away but could not resist glancing again.
When I looked back, he was already gone.
