CHAPTER 92………………………………………………..
If it had been a face that spoke out of anger, saying the opposite of what it truly felt, then I would have noticed.
If he had simply been sulking while secretly wishing I would stay, I wouldn’t have shrunk back like this.
In the voice he shouted at me, I could hear sincerity.
And because of that, the right thing to do—if I didn’t want to make things worse—was to follow his words.
“Didn’t I tell you not to come!”
Since my goal was to create conflict, just like when we first met, I stepped toward him again.
Even though he had his back turned, his senses were so sharp that the moment he heard my footsteps, he barked once more.
So firm…
Does he really hate even the sight of my face that much…?
“So you mean you don’t even want me near you, right? Fine. I get it. From now on, I’ll never come close again, just like you want!”
I shouted as if I were the victim and he the one hurting me.
Maybe because I immersed myself in that bitterness, tears slipped out from the corners of my eyes.
Even as I turned away, I couldn’t feel Ferédil’s presence at all.
It didn’t seem like he had any intention of stopping me.
It turned out exactly as I wanted…
But I didn’t feel good.
Was our relationship something that could end with just one argument?
Thud.
As I was heading back to the picnic site, a loud crash sounded behind me.
What was that?
I turned around—and immediately understood.
He was drenched in sweat, gasping for breath, collapsed on the ground.
“D-Duke!”
Hearing my scream, Noah and Luna came running.
Noah quickly lifted him and carried him into the carriage.
I clutched his hand tightly, praying we would reach the capital as soon as possible.
My anxiety was so intense I couldn’t even tell whose sweat made our hands damp.
Thankfully, after the doctor finished examining him, he stabilized.
I stayed by his side, and Noah and Luna returned first, as I asked.
He didn’t take long to wake.
Though his condition was improving, he looked so much thinner that it made my chest ache—and I found myself snapping for no reason.
“You have an olive allergy?”
“I usually avoid them, but I guess they were chopped up inside the sandwich.”
“Then why did you tell me not to come near you in the forest earlier?”
He hesitated, embarrassed, then finally answered.
“I… felt like I was going to throw up…
And I didn’t want you to see me like that.”
“I thought…”
“You thought what?”
There was no way I could leave someone who had collapsed today.
Breaking up with a sick person would be the worst.
Realizing it was already too late for separation, I spoke honestly.
“I thought you were angry at me… that you didn’t want me near you.”
“Angry? Me?”
“All day I kept comparing you to the Crown Prince out loud.
Every time he took care of my sister, I got jealous, and I made it obvious…”
It felt like confessing my sins.
But he scratched his face awkwardly.
“Um… I’m sorry, but… I didn’t hear any of it.
I didn’t have the mental energy to focus on conversation.”
Then his dark expression earlier was just…
Because he was in pain.
I thought my plan had worked, but I’d been running into a wall all by myself.
A hollow feeling washed over me.
I’d been making a fuss alone…
Well, not entirely alone.
The mercenaries had suffered too.
As I silently apologized to Noah and Luna, he took my hand.
“You feeling like I’m lacking isn’t something I’d get angry about.
That’s not something to be angry over.
I’ve never had proper dating experience.
I don’t know how to say sweet things.
I just try, in my own way, to treat you well.
I know I’m always lacking.”
How could he only give perfect answers?
There was no room left to argue.
Guilt swelled in me, and I lowered my head.
“The one who’s lacking is me.
I didn’t even know you had an olive allergy…”
“You’re lacking too.”
I looked up as his hand gently stroked my hair.
He was smiling at me—brighter than moonlight, softer than sunlight.
“I never liked you because you were perfect.
Isn’t love… two imperfect people filling each other in, becoming whole together?”
Instead of giving some proper response, all I could say was that he should rest.
What could I possibly say to someone whispering love like that?
His love for me wasn’t fading.
It was only growing deeper.
And it was becoming harder and harder to push him out of my heart…
Or to make him push me away.
Should I really abandon my dignity and stop washing for days?
I could already imagine myself explaining in an interview why we broke up.
That would ruin my image as an actress.
But personality differences or clashing tastes didn’t seem to make his affection waver at all…
So I’d begun considering extreme measures.
Dragging my feet back into Woodville, I found Luna waiting for me—though I’d thought she’d be asleep.
“How is the Duke?”
“He’s better.”
Relief crossed her face, and then she asked casually:
“And… did you get dumped? Did it work?”
I shook my head instead of answering.
“I’m sorry… I even dragged the Crown Prince into it.”
“Oh, I enjoyed the date, so it’s fine.
But… the Crown Prince misunderstood something.”
“Misunderstood?”
“He asked if maybe the one who needed to realize something wasn’t the Duke, but him.
He wondered if you were acting that way because you were upset with him.”
That made sense…
Noah must have felt that way after all that suffering.
I felt even worse.
“Even when I told him it wasn’t like that, he wouldn’t let go.
He kept saying if something was bothering me, I should be honest.”
“He really went through a lot because of me…”
“Hehe. He was cute, so it’s okay.
Anyway… want to have a drink with me?”
Luna… offering alcohol?
To me?
The child who hated alcohol??
Seeing my worried look, she offered an alternative.
“I’ll just fill my glass and only you drink.”
So we moved together.
She opened a low-alcohol champagne, filled my glass fully, and poured barely anything into hers.
“Did you even pour mine?”
“Of course. It’s just transparent, so you can’t see it.”
“This much is fine.”
Her joke didn’t work, so I tilted the bottle again and filled her glass halfway.
We clinked glasses.
I drank greedily.
The crisp bubbles made my suffocating chest feel a little clearer.
“Thank you… for suggesting this.
You’re trying to comfort me because my plan failed, right?”
“That too…
And honestly… there aren’t many days left where we can sit like sisters in this house, sharing drinks.”
Her empty tone made me feel strangely better.
I thought I was the only one conscious of our coming farewell…
But she, too, was reluctant to part.
I was glad to know that now.
“Is it really that hard… to get dumped?”
“I thought making someone fall in love was hard…
But making someone stop loving you would be easy.
Turns out it’s not easy at all.”
It was just a complaint, not a question.
But she chose her words carefully.
“Maybe it’s because there was never a reason you loved him.
If there had been a reason, then when that reason disappeared, love would disappear too.
But if you simply like Joyce herself…
Then love has no reason to leave.”
It was profound.
A reason for love…
I hadn’t held him in my heart because of a reason either.
If what she said was true, then it was a curse.
I accepted my love because I believed that once I returned to Bria, I could erase it.
But if love has no reason to leave…
Then even if I go to Bria…
Will I still love him?
“Then in How to Get Dumped by the Duke in 100 Days… how does the heroine get dumped?”
“She doesn’t.
Even after hearing every honest truth, the Duke still falls in love with her.
But she leaves him by her own choice, to pursue her dream of becoming an actress.”
“So… there was never a version where the Duke stops loving her?”
“That’s right.
But that’s because the story focuses on her chasing her dream.
The Duke wants her to stay in the capital…
But she realizes what she wants isn’t there.”
“…Was it that you couldn’t write a story where you get dumped?
Or that you didn’t want to?”
Her question didn’t register immediately.
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know much about writing…
But that story is autobiographical, isn’t it?
Joyce… isn’t it possible…
That you don’t truly want to be dumped by the Duke?”
When Ferédil said earlier that he hadn’t avoided me out of hatred…
I felt relieved.
I told myself it was simply because no one wants to be hated…
But…
Did I, from the beginning, want a story where we never part?
Was my mind growing hazy from the long day and weak champagne?
Or was it because the woman sitting across from me was turning my thoughts upside down?
Luna gently took my hand.
Her bright eyes met mine perfectly.
“Joyce…
It’s okay if you stay in Woodville.”
