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Chapter 32

Jun arrived at the Duke’s territory earlier that morning.

As always, the traveling troupe underwent a strict inspection.

“All right, you may pass!”

Once the uncomfortable inspection was over, the troupe members quickly climbed back into their respective wagons.

“Wait a moment.”

A knight who had been watching from a distance approached and suddenly grabbed Jun by the hair. It hurt so much that he almost screamed, but Jun clenched his teeth and endured it.

The knight examined a black stain on his hand, then pointed at Jun with his chin. Immediately, soldiers came over and grabbed both of Jun’s arms.

“Oh my, sir, what seems to be the problem?”

The leader of the troupe hurried over, rubbing his hands together.

“Are you sure this suspicious person is really one of your members?”

“Well, yes, but…”

“Then he should have proper identification.”

“P-please overlook that, sir. You know how it is…”

The leader kept bowing.

To be honest, no one who joined a traveling troupe like theirs was likely to have proper identification. Most of them were illegitimate children or orphans abandoned somewhere.

“I see. In that case, we might have to reconsider your entry permit.”

“Heavens, please don’t! Didn’t we just show you the permit and the endorsement letter from the count? Please, sir!”

The knight remained stern, and sensing trouble, the leader added quickly:

“This lad just joined us right outside the gate. He might have used the troupe to sneak in more easily! Please, sir, have mercy on us!”

“Is that true? That he joined just before arriving?”

“Absolutely! We’ve never had problems entering any town before! Please, take another look at our documents.”

Jun could only sigh at the leader’s smooth lies, not even bothering to moisten his lips.

In fact, someone had indeed joined them just outside the gate. It just hadn’t been Jun.

The knight turned back to Jun, as if daring him to explain himself.

Though it felt unfair, Jun considered the other members of the troupe. If rumors spread that they’d been denied entry, it might cause trouble for future performances.

“What the leader said… is true.”

“Take him away. He could be the wanted fugitive we’re searching for.”

And so, Jun was left alone in the gate office.

The knight and soldiers had treated him roughly, but he wasn’t particularly offended. Nobles and their ilk always treated members of traveling troupes like livestock.

He already knew exactly what would happen next.

Someone would show up and say, “This boy is not the fugitive.” Then the soldiers would take out their frustration by smacking his head or back and yelling at him to get lost.

He recalled a letter Lucien had once sent:

[Everyone I met in the Duke’s domain was so kind. If you knew how well I’m treated, you’d be shocked, Jun!]

Jun wasn’t naïve enough to take her words at face value.

‘That girl… she’s too kind for her own good.’

She had probably worked hard to learn how to write just to reassure him. For all he knew, she might be crying into her pillow every night.

And based on the knight and soldiers’ attitudes here, Jun felt even more convinced.

But—

“If we’ve captured the wrong person, then we owe him an apology.”

Those words from the young duke, that they should apologize to someone like a troupe member…

Honestly, Jun was quite shocked.

Still, he made sure not to let it affect him too deeply.

Even if it turned out he was innocent, there was no way a noble would truly bow their head to him.

They would probably just look at him with pity, pretend it never happened, and move on. That was the usual way of things.


“…Jun?”

When Jun gave his name, Benedict felt like he’d been struck on the head with a hammer.

“Yes.”

“Wait… the Jun from the troupe? The one who sews…?”

Jun flinched slightly at the word sews, but then nodded as if he understood.

“Yes, that’s me.”

Benedict was speechless, mouth agape.

Because in Benedict’s mind, Jun had always been…

A sweet, grandmotherly lady with a smile like summer sunshine.

But Jun was a boy?

And not even much younger than him?

Benedict stared at Jun again and imagined him sitting right next to Lucien, teaching her how to sew.

It felt… incredibly strange.

So strange it made his stomach twist uncomfortably.

Yet despite that discomfort, he realized that he and the knights had caused Jun trouble.

“What’s wrong, Your Grace?”

“Ah, well, it’s just…”

As Benedict stammered, unsure what to say, a childhood friend of Blackwood’s arrived at the office.

He immediately confirmed that Jun was not Blackwood, pointing out that though Jun was pretty, his facial features were completely different.

The knights’ mood instantly turned cold.

“Clicking his tongue, the knight said, “Guess it wasn’t him. Do a final body search, and if there’s nothing, send him off! Consider yourself lucky, got it?!”

He grabbed Jun by the collar, trying to hustle him out of the office—clearly wanting to get him away from Benedict’s sight as quickly as possible.

“I apologize for the inconvenience, Your Grace,” the knight muttered.

Benedict shook his head.

Though their methods were harsh, the knights had only followed orders.

“No, I should be the one to apologize.”

“But for someone like me, having the Duke apologize is far too much!”

The knight waved his hands frantically in a panic, but Benedict stepped forward and gently grabbed Jun’s arm.

Startled, the knight shouted, “Your Grace!”

“I’m sorry,” Benedict said quietly.

Then he bowed deeply to Jun.

Moments later, even the knights and soldiers around them found themselves bowing out of sheer confusion.

“There was a misunderstanding during heightened security procedures.”

“…”

Was he offended?

Jun didn’t respond.

Benedict cautiously raised his head to check Jun’s expression.

Strangely… he looked a little dazed.


A little later, Lucien received startling news through Juliet.

“What? The Duke?”

“Yes, he’s asked for you to be brought to the troupe’s camp on the outskirts of town.”

“But…”

Lucien recalled their agreement. Hadn’t she promised to stay in the mansion until Blackwood was caught?

“The Duke himself is going there with the boy named Jun.”

“What?!”

“Come to think of it, you once told me about a kind boy in the troupe named Jun, didn’t you?”

“Yes… What in the world is happening?”

“Indeed. Bringing his romantic rival right to you—perhaps this is what noble grace looks like?”

“Huh? I didn’t hear that.”

“I said, you should prepare to go out.”

Though something felt off, Lucien changed into her outdoor clothes, trusting in Benedict’s instructions.


Outside the village.

When Lucien saw the troupe’s wagons lined up, she ran over and waved.

“Lucien? Oh, look, it’s Lucien!”

“No way, that girl in the pretty dress is clumsy old Lucien?”

To be honest, the troupe wasn’t particularly warm with each other.

Performers preparing for dangerous shows were often irritable, and they frequently snapped at the young errand runners. Most of those kids ran away in tears.

But Lucien had endured it all since she was young.

Even if she’d always been called clumsy.

Years later, everyone had come to recognize Lucien’s diligence.

After she was sold to a noble house, things improved financially, but the mood in the troupe remained sour.

If Lucien had been the cunning type, they wouldn’t have worried so much.

But knowing her personality, everyone was sure she must be suffering terribly—and yet here she was, smiling brightly.

As Lucien approached with a shy smile, the troupe members breathed a sigh of relief.

Especially the most popular women in the troupe—Lilliana, Simone, and Elsie—hugged her warmly.

“Oh my, you’ve gotten chubby!”

“You’ve gotten even prettier!”

“Oh heavens.”

“Oh! This is Juliet, who came with me.”

“I’m Juliet. I’m always attached to Lucien.”

The members warmly welcomed Juliet too.

Soon after, Juliet followed a tightrope walker who boasted he’d show her the real way to walk a rope.

Lucien, prompted by the older girls’ curiosity, entered the wagon they used as a dressing room.

“So tell us—why did the duke’s house take you in?”

Before Lucien could speak, Simone and Elsie jumped in.

“I know! Because you look like a missing daughter, right?”

“Turns out you really were the daughter, huh?”

“Quiet, both of you! Let Lucien talk!”

Lucien chuckled softly and answered.

“I’m helping the new duke search for something.”

“Why you?”

“Well, I’m sure there’s a reason. Either way, that’s great. Once you find it, they’ll give you a place to stay, right?”

“N-no, that’s not it!”

Lucien quickly shook her head.

“I want to return to the troupe once the search is over… Would that be okay?”

“What? Is the new duke such a cheapskate that he won’t even pay you?!”

“No, it’s not like that! I just feel like staying after the job is done would be shameless. And besides, I don’t have anywhere else to go.”

Lucien didn’t want the older girls to misunderstand.

“And as for compensation, I’ve already received plenty.”

The day the former duke held her close and protected her with his life—Lucien had been given the gift of continued life.

“I’ve already… received so much.”

The sincerity in her voice made it clear to the troupe members that the reward she’d received wasn’t money or jewels.

“I knew it. Lucien is such a clumsy girl!”

“You really should think about profit! This is the perfect time to learn some real performing skills!”

“I’m sorry. But once I return, I’ll work hard at everything.”

“Good, that’s the spirit. Who else but us would take in someone as clumsy as you?”

Then came a knock at the door.

Lucien, still used to being a helper, ran to open it—and found a woman she’d never seen before.

She was beautiful, but something about her face felt unsettling.

Simone, walking up behind Lucien, introduced her.

“She’s a new recruit who just joined. Her knife-throwing skills are amazing.”

I Hope It Doesn’t Hurt When I Die

I Hope It Doesn’t Hurt When I Die

죽을 땐 아프지 않았으면 좋겠어
Score 9.9
Status: Ongoing Type: Author: Artist: Released: 2024 Native Language: Korean
Disturbingly pure white hair and red eyes. Lucienne is a girl who has been treated as “unlucky” both in the orphanage and among the wandering groups. The Duke of House Winfield comes to her aid. “Help my son. Ah, forgive me. I don’t know what to say…” Though I did not know what he wanted, for it had become a will, but the little Duke Benedict gave me a place beside him. “I will cherish you, whom my father saved”. Becoming Benedict’s friend, confidant and companion, For the first time in her life, Lucienne found happiness in the “home” she was allowed to be in. Until she realised the meaning of the Duke’s last words. “To free Benedict from the curse that seems to burn his body…” Lucienne had to die at Benedict’s hands. Then she was ready to die. At the hands of her beloved. “Please accept my death, Benedict.”

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