CHAPTER 33
“Elly says she likes the outfit I picked the most.”
I never said that—but I just looked quietly at Lupian. Despite the incredulous looks from everyone, he calmly stood up and walked over to where I was standing.
“So, I’d like the rest of you to leave.”
He pulled me in and rested his chin on my shoulder as he spoke. Each time he talked, his breath brushed my earlobe, and I instinctively turned my head, but Lupian only held me tighter. Lisa gasped, covering her mouth, and then quickly nodded. Howla, wearing a devastated expression, opened his mouth. I didn’t need to hear him speak to know what he wanted to say.
“Lady Ai—!”
“We’ll leave for now, but from now on, please be sure to ask permission before entering the lady’s room!”
Before Howla could speak, Lisa grabbed his wrist and dragged him out of the room. She was probably the only one in this mansion who could treat the young master like that. I had already thought she was bold when she dared serve salty tea to both father and son, but ever since she became my personal maid, that boldness had only grown. And despite seeming fearless, she would always shrink when threatened, which I found oddly cute.
They moved farther away, but Lupian used his power, and I could hear their conversation clearly.
“You’re treating me so roughly now. Are you more scared of Lord Lupian than me?”
“Of course! Even you freeze up in front of him, don’t you?”
“But a cheeky maid dragging the young master around like that deserves punishment.”
At Howla’s teasing, Lisa stammered slightly.
“I—I’m Lady Ailee’s personal maid! If you want to punish me, you’ll have to ask her first! And I only left because Lord Lupian asked me to!”
“Oh? What kind of request?”
“That’s…”
Just as Lisa was about to answer, Lupian gently covered my ear with his palm. In that moment, all sound around me was cut off—whatever he did muted not only their conversation, but the entire world.
“….”
So I wasn’t supposed to hear that? I could guess what the request was—probably something like “Give me some time alone with Ailee.” Or maybe asking her to get Howla off his back for a bit. I placed my hand over his and gently moved it away. His skin was still pleasantly cool.
As sound returned, I turned toward him while still holding his hand, spinning lightly to avoid being suddenly pulled into another hug. It felt like we were dancing—a formal ballroom hold.
I asked, suddenly, “Did you have something you wanted to say to me?”
“…Not particularly.”
The background noise was loud, but the loudest thing of all was my heartbeat. I hated how my body got excited just from being close to him. If only I could control my reactions—blushing cheeks and racing pulse—I wouldn’t have felt the need to avoid Lupian so much.
‘Anyone could tell…’
That I liked Lupian—Pionero knew, Garnet knew, Howla knew, even Lisa knew. And of course, Lupian had to know. He wasn’t a fool, especially not after living a thousand years.
And yet, he never pushed me away, never mentioned it directly. Which meant… he probably hoped I’d get over it on my own. That what I felt was just deep affection, the kind that forms between a caretaker and a ward—not romantic love. If that were true, and he didn’t avoid me simply because he didn’t see me that way, then there was no way I could act how he wanted.
Avoiding his gaze, I tried to pull my hand away. But Lupian only gripped it tighter and drew me closer, wrapping his other arm around my waist.
Our eyes met again. His gaze told me—he wouldn’t let me keep running away. His eyes had turned darker than usual, full of stubborn resolve. I gasped and tried to step back, but he held me firmly and began speaking, as if none of it mattered.
“Come to think of it, I’ve heard people praising how much your dancing has improved.”
Was he really trying to dance now? The position we were in was the standard ballroom hold. It all felt like a joke—like he was playing with my feelings. I kept trying to convince myself that Lupian wasn’t that kind of person, but I couldn’t shake off the creeping doubt. Shaking my head, I tried to escape this moment.
“…It used to be terrible. This is just me being slightly less terrible.”
“Doesn’t matter. A man leads the dance anyway.”
He pulled me even closer, leaving no space between us, and lightly kissed my forehead. Then, he began to move, and I automatically followed his steps.
“I don’t want to dance with you.”
My heart was pounding, drowning out every other sound. Lupian had no intention of letting go. My head was spinning, and I couldn’t think. I ended up blurting out the words. That made it twice today I’d outright rejected him. Worried he might get angry, I looked up—and saw a pained smile on his face.
“You’re cruel.”
He let me go just like that, as if his stubborn hold had been an illusion.
“I don’t understand what you’re so afraid of.”
But even then, he kept holding one of my hands and kissed the back of it. His cold lips lingered for a moment, and when they pulled away, I didn’t know how to react. You don’t understand? That had to be a joke. The worst one I’d ever heard. Hearing those words made it feel like my last thread of composure was about to snap.
He knew. He knew everything.
I felt like I was reaching my limit. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. He was trying to force a resolution—tired of me dodging, tired of my silence. So fine. If that’s what he wanted, he’d get it.
I lowered my head, then slowly raised it to meet his gaze.
“Don’t pretend you don’t know.”
“…Hm?”
“My heart’s loud, isn’t it? Loud enough to sound like it’s going to burst out of my chest.”
Lupian tilted his head, looking confused for once. If it were anyone else, I might have called it cute. But on him, even that looked lazy and seductive. I grumbled, pointing at my flushed cheeks.
“Now my face turns red too.”
“That’s cute. But… so what?”
“…Lupian, you’re not that oblivious.”
He wasn’t clueless—he was eerily perceptive. Right now, it just felt like he was teasing me, and it was getting to the point where it wasn’t even frustrating—it was just sad. But then, his eyes changed. The widening of his pupils, the flash of realization—he got it.
After a long pause, he spoke with a straight face—completely serious.
“Any living being who sees me has an increased heart rate.”
“….”
It was just the content that was ridiculous. He wasn’t wrong. Whether it was awe or fear, people’s hearts did race around him. But really—was now the time to say that?
“Haha. Elly, you were the same the first time you saw me.”
So it was a joke—partly. He chuckled lowly. I was at a loss for words. Come to think of it, my heart had pounded the first time I saw him—after awakening as a half-demon. It wasn’t something recent. It had always been that way.
It wasn’t a slow, creeping kind of love.
It was love at first sight.
Why was I only realizing that now?
Lupian opened his arms toward me, like he was waiting for me to run into them. His soft red smile made me freeze and take a step back—startled like I’d been burned.
“Besides, you loving me is only natural.”
“…What do you mean by that?”
I asked, baffled. He looked hurt.
“Did you forget already? I still clearly remember the little chick who chirped about wanting to love me.”
“Ugh.”
I groaned at the memory of my embarrassing past. Yeah, I hadn’t realized it then, but confessing something like that was proof I already saw him romantically. I’d even kissed him and made him hear my racing heartbeat. Lupian must have known—maybe even before that moment.
Anyone would laugh if someone who clearly liked them went around asking, “Teach me how to love.” I wanted to crawl into a hole. But Lupian continued unfazed.
“You were too young to even realize it was a confession, so I just waited.”
“….”
“I still am. And I will.”
“….”
“Until you’re ready.”
He opened his arms again. His violet eyes, full of affection, locked with mine and curved into soft crescent moons. He looked sincerely happy, like an innocent boy’s smile.
Despite how I’d spent days avoiding him, my feet moved on their own, slowly approaching him. And just like that, Lupian pulled me into his arms and gently stroked my hair, just like he used to. I felt ridiculous for thinking I’d been suffering alone like some tragic fool.
I didn’t even remember the last time I had willingly hugged him.
As I let out a deep breath, a wave of relief came—but with it, an unresolved unease crept in. When he said he waited… did that mean he liked me too? Did he really not see me as a child?
“…What am I to you, Lupian?”
I asked quietly, resting my forehead against his chest. If he truly loved me, I wanted to hear him say it—clearly. But considering he’d cared for me since before I awakened—since he first found me—it seemed hard to believe he’d see me romantically. I couldn’t even bring myself to look at him after saying it, and instead buried myself deeper in his arms.
But Lupian responded without a hint of hesitation. His voice was steady—like he was giving the one and only correct answer.
“Your body, your heart, even a fragment of your soul—every piece of you belongs to me.”
