Chapter 73
“Of course, it might look like I’m being neglected, but I’m a dragon who doesn’t need protection. I’m stronger than humans.”
Jaina curved her previously expressionless eyes into a gentle smile.
“And there’s also Mikael Oppa, Hilvenzia, Izren, and Yurika in the Mage Tower. Mikael Oppa can be a bit prickly, but deep down, he’s full of affection for me. Hilvenzia always makes food for me—she’s kind. And also…”
Seiden, who had been quietly listening, interrupted her as if something had struck him, asking,
“So, what do you think Diamid feels about you?”
“Huh?”
“All the people you just mentioned seem to have goodwill toward you. Then what about Diamid? Do you think he gave those things out of goodwill toward you?”
The gentle curve of Jaina’s eyes hardened into a cold, expressionless stare. She remained silent for a long moment, then delivered a short, sharp response:
“No.”
Unlike her previous innocent expression, her answer was cynical and detached.
Diamid felt that short word pierce him like a dagger.
Jaina continued, quietly looking at Seiden.
“You’re very perceptive, Seiden-nim.”
“Jaina, you’re staying in the Mage Tower not because of Diamid, right?”
“Actually, yes. I want to stay in the Mage Tower not because of the Mage Lord, but because of the people around me. It’s true that I’ve received favors from the Mage Lord, but I don’t think that’s out of affection or goodwill toward me.”
Diamid felt as if his heart had dropped.
He didn’t even notice Seiden’s glance toward him, frozen in place as any remaining hope vanished.
He had been thrilled and overjoyed at hearing that she wanted to stay and that the Mage Lord had treated her well.
But the truth was, her wish to remain in the Mage Tower had nothing to do with expectation, affection, or resentment toward him.
Mikael, Hilvenzia, Izren… even a maid who had only recently been assigned.
‘There’s absolutely no room for me in Jaina’s heart.’
Whether it was hatred, anger, or a desire for revenge—there was simply no space.
“I’m truly grateful for your offer, Seiden-nim. I know it was because you were thinking of me… but I don’t want to part with the precious people in the Mage Tower.”
“Then, if you had just arrived in the Mage Tower, would you have accepted my offer?”
Jaina answered without hesitation:
“Yes.”
Seiden, feeling it was a pity to leave it at that, suggested one last walk with Jaina.
“If you insist that much, I won’t force you. But I’d like to visit sometimes—would that be alright?”
“I’d be happy if you came, Seiden-nim.”
“I’m grateful to hear you say that.”
Seiden smiled gently.
Though his face bore no visible wrinkles, the expression carried the weight of time.
After a long silence, Seiden carefully brought up a new topic.
“How much do you know about evil spirits?”
Jaina tilted her head in surprise at the sudden change but replied politely:
“That they move by inhabiting the bodies of the dead?”
“Yes, that’s the short version. But when you actually face them, it’s not so simple. Evil spirits… were truly evil. They didn’t just attack humans; they made humans fight each other.”
Seiden’s eyes traced the air, as if recalling the past.
Jaina had nothing to say, simply observing him quietly. It didn’t seem that Seiden expected any particular answer.
“The dead rose again, and people called it a miracle. But when they realized it wasn’t a miracle but an evil spirit inhabiting them, despair set in, and they cursed and blamed us for slaying them.”
“……”
“Even if we couldn’t speak properly, couldn’t move, those were their family, lovers, friends… and we killed them. We, who had vowed to sacrifice ourselves to save the world, became murderers in an instant.”
Seiden smiled cynically.
“To defeat the King of Evil Spirits, we had to eliminate all his minions first. That was right… but people didn’t thank us—they looked at us with resentment.”
Jaina sensed that Seiden had been hurt too much in the past, making him somewhat numb.
At that moment, he continued,
“And the one who suffered the most from this was Diamid.”
Jaina flinched in surprise.
She knew from the story that Diamid had sealed his emotions due to the pain, but the exact circumstances beyond Bezrichte’s betrayal were unclear.
“When the evil spirit spoke through a child’s body, begging to be saved, Diamid’s expression then… I will never forget it. He was the most sensitive among us. Empathetic, feeling pain even for wilted flowers or trampled sprouts. After killing that child, Diamid spent several nights sleepless.”
Seiden sighed as he spoke.
“When the evil spirit left the child’s body, the child collapsed again. The parents blamed Diamid as a murderer, slapped him multiple times, knocked him down, and pounded him relentlessly. Diamid… just endured it.”
“Why…?”
“They thought it would ease their grief, believing there was someone to blame… seeing the child die twice must have been heartbreaking.”
“……”
“He was that foolish. Hesitating, unable to eliminate the evil spirits in time, and when his lover Bezrichte was in danger, he blamed himself and sealed his own emotions. A good-hearted fool unsuited for a mage.”
Seiden forced a smile through his contorted face.
“Funny, right? Yes, I think so too. That’s why it angered me so much. That guy, who was kind even to other people’s children… couldn’t believe he left his own child neglected.”
“……”
“Maybe I, being his old colleague, think too highly of him… but I believe he wouldn’t dislike you.”
Jaina, listening quietly, let her blue eyes flicker slightly, but she said nothing.
“So please, even if Diamid is clumsy and lacking, give him one more chance. He’s experiencing fatherhood for the first time too…”
Seiden walked toward Diamid, who was behind a pillar.
He crossed his arms and asked with a tilted, sarcastic tone:
“The hero who saved the world, just eavesdropping… be honest. How do you truly feel about her?”
“…Does my opinion matter?”
“Foolish man.”
Seiden’s eyes conveyed disdain and contempt.
Diamid knew that, despite Seiden appearing relaxed and careless, he was actually the most righteous among their peers and valued family and companions above all.
“You know why I’m doing this. You want to end up whining like a pitiful dog after completely losing her?”
His past included losing his family to evil spirits.
“Isn’t it time to be honest? You think of her as your own daughter, right? I don’t think you dislike Jaina.”
“……”
“Even though I said she’s my daughter, a responsible person wouldn’t have left her like that.”
“……I know.”
“Then why?”
Seiden laughed in disbelief.
Diamid remained silent. Seiden realized the silence wasn’t evasion; he exhaled deeply and continued.
“It must be overwhelming, of course. But there’s hope—Jaina doesn’t seem to hate you…”
“Yes, she doesn’t.”
Diamid’s previously clouded eyes ignited with intense emotion, startling Seiden.
“But can that really be called positive?”
“Considering what you’ve done, the fact she doesn’t hate you…”
“A child who lost her mother sought her father. But even that father abandoned her, saying she wasn’t his daughter. Isn’t it normal to hate and resent him?”
Seiden shuddered at Diamid’s self-deprecating tone.
“I told her she wasn’t my daughter, demanded she stay out of my sight, even treated her harshly. And still, she doesn’t resent me.”
“……”
“Seiden, isn’t the opposite of love indifference? That child doesn’t even have enough interest to hate me.”
Diamid spread his empty hands and continued:
“I don’t know what to do. We’ve already come too far.”
Diamid’s magic stirred, forming a mirror in the air. Reflected in it was Jaina playing with Yurika.
“She’s close even with a maid she’s only recently met, with no blood relation. But I, her blood father, can’t step near her.”
“Diamid…”
“Seiden, if I beg her forgiveness, is it really for her sake? Or is it selfishness to ease my own heart? She doesn’t need me.”
Seiden covered his face with his hands and muttered:
“Foolish man, stubborn man.”
“I know.”
Seiden ran his hands through his hair and sighed deeply.
‘If he speaks to me like this, his insides must be rotting.’
He saw the blue eyes that Bezrichte had loved flicker with a murky light.
