Chapter 29

His blunt tone still sounded like the same old friend, Iseong, but his eyes—his gaze was soaked with the same focus he had on her last night. Suddenly, a tingle shot between her legs.

“You came because I didn’t reply?”

“You know that—and still didn’t reply?”

“Since when did we have to follow rules? Do we have to reply? Can’t I ignore it, ghost it, or leave it on read? That’s just how it is, isn’t it?”

“Then maybe we should make one.”

“Make what?”

“A rule. Something that has to be followed. No ghosting, no ignoring.”

Wasn’t that dangerous thinking? Creating a rule to make sure she doesn’t ignore him—wasn’t that already closer to being lovers than friends?

She forced a laugh, replying awkwardly.

“Haha. So now we’re making rules in our friendship?”

“More like… redefining our relationship.”

Redefining their relationship. That was even more dangerous. If they weren’t “just friends” anymore, there weren’t many other options. And that scared her.

She felt the need to draw a line immediately.

“You and I aren’t going to start calling each other boyfriend or girlfriend. Just because we had sex once… doesn’t mean anything’s changed. Or am I overthinking this?”

Don’t cross the line.

Emotion sharply drew the boundary. Don’t come at her with that subtle masculine air, acting like things were different.

She had always put up solid walls between them—and today was no different. Iseong thought he saw a gap in those walls.

Last night, he had seen her break down—seen her as a woman, fully alive beneath him.

He wanted to see that face again. Countless times. And now he couldn’t hold that desire back anymore.

But if he pushed her too hard, she’d run again.

So he’d have to break through the only way that ever worked—with honesty.

“You started this. You should take responsibility, don’t you think? You took my first time.”

Her face flushed.

“You took my first time.”

The bold, embarrassing words hit her so hard, her cheeks burned. She looked around frantically and snapped:

“Hey, watch your mouth! What if someone hears you?!”

“If someone hears? They’ll think, ‘Oh, she took that guy’s virginity. Damn, she’s impressive.’”

“You’re joking now?”

“I’m not. I’m saying—take responsibility.”

She answered seriously.

“Responsibility for what?”

“You said you’d help me. That you’d fix my erectile dysfunction.”

Fix it? She didn’t remember being that direct. And more importantly—erectile dysfunction? That was ridiculous.

Her body still ached from what he’d done to her. Far from dysfunction, he was more like… a beast.

“…Pretty sure it’s fixed now.”

“That’s because it was you.”

“But you said you were thinking of someone else. Over and over—you said that.”

“I tried. In the moment. But it’s not something that goes away all at once.”

She couldn’t tell what he was really thinking. Did he really want to fix himself? Because if this went on, their friendship could be ruined. Did that not matter to him?

“So… what? You want me to keep helping you until you can do it with someone else? Keep having sex?”

As if that would ever work. Jung-a, do you really think I could be with another woman? Physically, sure. But they make me sick. Only you make me feel anything.

“How could I? You’re the only option I have.”

Just then, a group of elementary school kids wandered into the playground. She grabbed his sleeve.

“Where’s your car?”

Without a word, he led the way to the parking lot. The underground lot was dim and silent.

Standing by his SUV, he opened the passenger door for her. Familiar rhythm. She got in without hesitation.

As soon as he sat in the driver’s seat, she blurted out:

“So, redefining the relationship. That’s what this is, right?”

“What?”

“FWB.”

Friends with benefits. Sex without commitment. A relationship that enjoys the body, but skips the heart.

“What’s that?”

He blinked, as if he genuinely didn’t know.

“Google it later. In short… it means we’re friends who have sex. That kind of thing.”

“Friends… who have sex. Wow… what a messed-up kind of relationship.”

“That’s what we’re doing, isn’t it? Me helping you—that’s what it turned into.”

He let out a hollow laugh. That their connection could be summed up with something so pathetic—FWB.

But if he confessed how he really felt, she’d run. That “summary” was the only thin rope he had to hold on to.

Because the only time she ever saw him as more than a friend… was that one moment.

“If you hate it, I won’t force it. If you don’t want it, just walk away.”

The guy who had pushed so hard was now suddenly backing off, and that made Emotion feel strangely empty.

But even more than her, Iseong looked emptier.

What the hell. Why did his stupidly handsome face look so pitiful?

There were times like this. Times when his perfect face looked unbearably sad.

When Iseong made that hollow expression, it always made her weak. No matter how tough she wanted to act, she’d end up doing what he wanted.

He was the kind of guy who always had to win—but when he made that helpless face, she had to lose.

It didn’t happen often. And this was definitely one of those times.

She gave up the fight.

“I want to. I do want to. I don’t hate it.”

Last night… despite all her tangled emotions, she had enjoyed it. And part of her really did want to help him with this terrible problem of his.

“But what about us? What if this ruins everything?”

He swallowed a sigh. Jung-a, if we were just friends, we’d already be broken. No—this wheel started cracking a long time ago, when I first started seeing you as a woman.

I’m ready to shatter it completely if it means I can be honest now.

If I told you that, you’d call me insane.

“…Remember back when I was a rookie? When I kept failing auditions? My mental state was wrecked. If you hadn’t stayed up drinking with me, I wouldn’t have made it. And when you broke up with those loser boyfriends and said you wanted to die—I’m the one who snapped you back to reality, right? Our history… it won’t break from one scratch. We’ve done worse. Just because we’re doing something a little ‘male and female’ now doesn’t mean it all falls apart.”

Was acting the only thing he learned as an actor? His words were slick—too smooth. It stung her heart in a strange way.

Emotion stared at him with the same innocent look she had back when he’d pretend to be pathetic. Even when he acted tough, she knew better than anyone that he was weak to sympathy.

Strong like fire against the strong, soft like water to the weak—that’s who she was.

And in that moment, his sad eyes had already softened her heart.

Like a deer being coaxed into the net, she sighed and asked:

“…What even is sex? Why is it so scary?”

Sex. It was the turning point that could either redefine or destroy their bond. Maybe it was just a selfish move to fulfill his desire.

Emotion was probably more afraid of ruining their friendship than anything.

He nodded in understanding. What she needed now wasn’t persuasion—it was empathy.

“It is scary…”

“…Let’s kiss.”

Ha. She always had a knack for throwing him off with the most unexpected timing. Just like that.

Let’s kiss. That was all she said.

But somehow… his lower half was already reacting. Rising to the occasion.

Damn it. I’m losing my mind.