Chapter 113
“Ugh…”
I opened my eyes and groaned as I pushed myself upright.
Judging by the throbbing headache, this was clearly reality—but the place I was in was not the royal palace.
Where am I?
The space around me was entirely white, and the only thing in sight was the bed I had been lying on.
The only other notable object was a door visible in the distance.
“…Shall I check it out?”
I carefully stepped down from the bed and walked barefoot across the soft, sandy floor.
This feels strange.
I was only wearing a thin piece of cloth, yet I felt neither cold nor warm.
My feet felt unnaturally light, as if gravity didn’t exist. I decided to treat it as a vivid dream.
What was I doing before I fell asleep?
I felt like I had forgotten something important, but it wouldn’t come to mind.
The feeling grew stronger as the white door in the distance slowly drew closer with each step.
With every step I took, I felt myself forgetting a little more about who I was.
Finally, I stood before the floating door, as if suspended by magic, and grasped the handle.
Someone suddenly appeared behind me and rested their chin on my shoulder.
“You shouldn’t enter here yet, Ishtar.”
“Ishtar?”
“Yes, that is your name in this world.”
Instantly, it was as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over my head.
What… I even forgot my own name…?
Even for a dream, this was odd.
I stared blankly at the man before me.
“Aziz.”
“Yes, that is my name. Do you remember everything now?”
Confused, I pressed my throbbing head with my hand.
Until falling asleep, I had been in the royal palace.
I had been healing Suleiman together with Aziz.
As all memories returned, I grabbed his collar and said,
“Oh my god, Aziz. We need to go back quickly. I have to check if Suleiman has fully recovered…”
“Suleiman is fine. His healing has been completed, so he will regain consciousness soon.”
“…Really?”
“Of course. Trust me.”
I exhaled in relief at the certainty in Aziz’s voice.
Regaining some composure, I scanned my surroundings and asked him,
“But where is this place? I’ve never seen it before… yet it feels somewhat familiar.”
“It’s roughly a dimension between the mortal and celestial realms. You’ve been here with me before, though you wouldn’t remember.”
“With you, Aziz?”
“Yes. It’s a necessary passage to reach another world.”
“Another world… You say it as if it’s a world I once lived in.”
I looked at him curiously, but he only smiled, offering no further explanation.
I sighed and shifted the topic.
“But why are we here? When can we go back?”
“If you’re worried about reality, you don’t need to be. As long as you remain in this dimensional gap, time in your world is effectively paused.”
“That’s reassuring, but… it doesn’t answer my question.”
Aziz, who had been silent, finally spoke, gazing at me.
“You’ll be able to return soon, Ishtar.”
“Huh? Then when will you…?”
“As for me…”
Aziz reached toward me, but his fingers began to turn transparent, scattering like grains of sand.
“Aziz…!!”
Startled, I tried to grab his hand.
But my hand swept through empty air.
He looked at me with a faint smile, as if amused by my panic.
Then he said something I could hardly believe.
“This is about my limit. I pushed a bit to say goodbye to you.”
“Goodbye? What do you mean by that?!”
I grabbed his arm, shaking him in anger.
As his arm gradually became transparent, it felt oddly soft and unreal.
Stepping back in despair, he chuckled softly.
“I mean it literally. Once you return to reality, I will have vanished. This will be our last meeting.”
“Don’t lie, Aziz. This is all a dream… right?”
“No, it’s real.”
He spoke about his own disappearance as if it were nothing.
I didn’t know whether to be angry or sad.
Did I… cause this because I gave him all my life force?
The thought hit me suddenly, and my legs felt weak. My vision seemed to dim.
Aziz supported me with a bittersweet smile.
“I’m sorry, Ishtar. This was decided from the moment we met. It’s not your fault.”
“How… how could you do this without telling me? You could’ve explained at least.”
Tears silently rolled down my cheeks.
He wiped them gently with his sleeve and said,
“I don’t ask for your understanding. I acted on my own. Bringing you to this world, my disappearance—it’s all my doing.”
I widened my eyes in shock.
So all of this—my reincarnation here—was because of him?
Unable to speak, he calmly continued,
“Shall I tell you a dull old story?”
He snapped his fingers, and a chair appeared for me to sit on.
After seating me, he began slowly explaining.
“Once there was a man. He lived for a very long time without knowing emotions or love. Like a puppet of the gods, he simply carried out the tasks given to him.”
I swallowed hard, facing him.
For the first and last time, he was sharing his story with me.
“During that monotonous life, the man met a woman. Meeting her, he finally understood the reason for his own existence.”
“You mean the woman who was a saint…”
At the word “saint,” Aziz’s shoulders trembled slightly.
Even after so long, his eyes reflected the pain as if it had happened yesterday.
“Yes. But the time granted to them was far too short.”
“Aziz…”
I looked at him with sympathy. He clenched his fists tightly.
“The man was furious. He had devoted his life to the gods, yet they took her away. She was the only thing he had in this world…”
He lowered his head, unable to continue, then chuckled softly.
“As you may have guessed, that man is me. But I could do nothing, even as she was dying.”
“Aziz, it’s not your fault.”
“But I couldn’t forgive myself. Then I found someone in another world who could free me from the cycle of this time. That was Sahee—you.”
“Then you… couldn’t have…”
“Yes, the cat you cared for. At the moment it took its last breath, I guided you here.”
Oh my god.
I pressed my forehead, whispering in shock,
So that’s why he and Suleiman seemed at odds…
“I was a little jealous of your new caretaker. At first, memories of your world were vague, but instinctively, I came to dislike Suleiman.”
He shrugged and smiled brightly.
The dark aura from before had vanished from Aziz’s face.
“I am truly grateful to you, Ishtar. Now the kingdom has no saint who must die for the gods, no mysterious ageless priest. Thanks to you, I am finally free.”
“I haven’t done anything for you, though…”
He was the one who allowed me a new life and to meet those I love.
The one who stayed by me even when I ended my previous life in misery—my cat.
Now I must truly say goodbye to him. What could I give him in return?
“Just being with you has been a great gift, Ishtar.”
He pressed a loving kiss to my forehead and slowly dispersed into the wind.
He’s completely disappearing…
I watched his final moments with a heavy heart.
Fortunately, Aziz was not alone.
A familiar woman appeared in the distance.
“Austhar.”
The goddess glided forward in her long dress, gently embracing the fading Aziz.
A strange, intimate atmosphere surrounded them.
I realized that Austhar, the goddess, was connected to Aziz’s former lover, the saint.
“Rest peacefully, Aziz.”
He seemed to move his lips, then closed his eyes with a peaceful expression I had never seen before.
The goddess, holding a small orb-like soul, spoke to me.
“With the guardian gone, the kingdom will soon face a great era of change. Ishtar, please lend your strength.”
“Me? I can’t be someone like Aziz.”
“You don’t need to be anyone else. Live true to yourself. If you endure it all, you will live a full human life.”
“You mean… I can return to being human…?”
“Yes. Truly human.”
No sooner had she finished speaking than a dark veil fell around me.
The bright white space instantly turned pitch black.
“Sometimes foolish, sometimes successful, but you can be happy. Live strongly, Ishtar.”
The moment she disappeared, everything went dark.
