Chapter 07
“…But I have conditions.”
“What kind?”
“I hate being bothered, so unless it’s necessary, do not touch me. And I want you to cook in a safe and sanitary environment. Well… you’re a chef, so you should know.”
Kaizen was as picky as ever.
But that much? I could easily accept.
I gave him a bright business smile and patted his shoulder.
“Great. Then why don’t we go inside the inn and discuss the details?”
“Fine.”
His shoulder immediately jerked away from my hand.
Still—thank you very much! Truly!
***
We returned to the inn.
We each ordered a cup of oolong tea, preparing to discuss things seriously, when—
“Hmph.”
“Tch.”
“Ha!”
—Hamma kept grumbling loudly at the next table, ruining the mood.
What was his problem now?
Kaizen was too quiet, and Hamma was too noisy. Was a middle ground so hard to find?
“Let’s start by introducing ourselves. I’m Choi Romi. Just call me Romi. And you?”
“Kaizen.”
“Good, Kaizen.”
I lifted my chin and declared confidently:
“I’d like you to participate in a tasting evaluation for all three meals. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. How about it?”
“If nothing special happens, I can do that.”
“And I want to travel around the continent to find the right place to open the restaurant. You’ll accompany me, right?”
Kaizen’s eyebrow twitched.
“Are you telling me to follow you around?”
“No. You’re free to go wherever you want. I only need you to visit one place I choose. During our travels, I won’t bother you. Just show up on time and eat your meals. You won’t have to look for food or cook yourself. Isn’t that convenient?”
His eyes lifted slowly from his teacup. He was clearly trying to figure out my intentions.
I met his gaze calmly, wiping any hint of personal desire from my expression.
“…Fine.”
His expression soured slightly as he nodded.
Ugly reaction, but the situation itself was good.
“Then pack your things. We’re leaving right away.”
My plan to cook from the inn was ruined—but as long as the destination was reached, who cared about the route?
I shot Hamma a sneaky wink.
He turned his head away with a huffy pout.
“Come here, Hamma.”
While Kaizen went upstairs to pack, I called Hamma over to explain my plan.
“Hmph!”
He pretended to ignore me, snorting like some petty neighborhood auntie… But he scurried over and plopped down across from me.
“What on earth are you thinking, Lady Romi? You helped that hero on purpose, didn’t you? That hero who killed us ninety-nine times!”
“I was going to talk about that.”
“Then please do!”
Hamma crossed his arms and pouted dramatically.
“First, cut that tone. If you keep acting clingy, I’ll leave you behind.”
Immediately, he lowered his arms and folded his hands politely.
Finally, he was ready to listen.
“I came here to cure Kaizen’s burnout. I can’t keep watching him die over and over.”
His round, red eyes widened.
I continued:
“The method is for him to eat my cooking consistently. That’s why I have to travel with him. You know my food has special effects—you experienced it yourself.”
“H-Huh?! Is that true?”
“Yeah. My goal is to cure his burnout and watch him defeat the Demon King with the princess.”
Because that was the only way I would get to go home.
I kept that part to myself.
“So I need your help. Can I count on you?”
“Anything! As long as I don’t turn eight years old again, Hamma can do anything!”
“Good. First, the plan is…”
With a sly grin, I explained my grand strategy to him.
The Kaizen Proper Guidance Project.
***
Kaizen’s luggage was minimal: a sword and one backpack.
Seeing that same forever-familiar backpack again after ninety-eight regressions made me both nostalgic and furious.
“We’ll start with Hanak Village. After that, I’ll follow wherever you go.”
“Understood.”
“And this is Hamma, from Hanak Village. My assistant.”
Only then did Kaizen seem to notice the little beast-tribe boy glaring at him.
“You had a companion.”
“Nice to meet you, Hero! Please don’t die this time—cough—I mean, I hope you enjoy the meals!”
Kaizen glanced at him once, then looked away.
Judging from that reaction, he would probably never realise that Hamma’s hair was snow-white.
And so began our strange journey: two humans and one beast-tribe boy.
We retraced the path we took on the way to the starting village.
Even though we walked through the same scenery, everything felt different now.
After about half a day, the sun began to set.
Hamma glanced at Kaizen, then exaggeratedly grabbed his lower back.
“Ow, ow, my legs… Hamma is delicate… long walks are too hard…”
Why his back hurt when his legs supposedly hurt, I would never know.
Fortunately, Kaizen ignored him completely.
“We’ll camp here.”
“Yay!”
Our baggage was minimal, so setting up camp was simple. We unrolled a mat under a shady tree.
Hamma scooted close, eyes sparkling.
“Lady Romi, what’s for dinner?”
“Hmm.”
I turned my head, scanning the surroundings.
A large lake glimmered at the edge of my vision.
“We’ll grill some fish today. I’ll make proper food once we reach the village.”
“Fish…?”
I pointed toward the big lake we had passed earlier. Hamma’s eyes went huge.
“You’re going to catch them yourself?”
“Yes. I’ll be back. Start a fire.”
“Okay! Hamma will trust Lady Romi!”
I glanced at Kaizen. He leaned against a tree, unmoving, not even unpacking.
Was he a robot?
Shaking my head, I headed toward the lake.
“One, two. One, two.”
I stretched a little, then stepped into the water.
“Ugh! Cold!”
The water was much colder than expected, making my heart jump.
Truthfully, I had never caught a fish before. I couldn’t even swim.
“But it was easy in the game, so it’ll be fine… right?”
With that naïve confidence, I waded deeper.
Then—
“Bwah! Glub—!”
Turns out I was absolutely terrible with water.
I wasn’t catching fish—I was drowning!
“Oh my god! I’m dying!”
As I flailed and screamed—
Splaaaash—!
Someone cut through the water toward me with powerful strokes.
Kaizen?
Why was he—
Even through the panic, his ash-grey hair was unmistakable.
The moment my body began to go limp from swallowing too much water—
“If you can’t swim, why did you jump into a lake?”
Kaizen’s strong arm wrapped around my waist.
I squeezed my eyes shut. Not because I was fainting—because I was mortified.
He carried me out of the lake, set me gently onto the grass—
And from a distance came frantic little footsteps.
“OH NOOO! LADY ROMI! What happened?! Y-You’re not dead, right?!”
Hamma grabbed my shoulders and shook me violently.
My head was spinning and my ears were ringing.
“Waaahhh! What a humiliation! You bragged so loudly about catching fish, and now look! What if the lake ate you, huh?! Open your eyes! Waaah!”
Stop. Please stop. You’re making this worse.
I lay perfectly still, pretending to be unconscious.
Right then, Kaizen sighed sharply beside me.
“I know you’re not unconscious. Open your eyes and shut this rabbit up.”
“How dare you talk that way to someone who almost died?! Fine! I’ll give her CPR—”
What? NO!
