Chapter 73. Even If You Searched the Whole World
Thanks to the study Taeseong had prepared for her, Haeyoung’s synopsis for the upcoming contest flowed smoothly onto the page.
Stretching once as she noticed the darkness outside the window, she checked her phone.
“…Is he busy…?”
The earnest voice that had asked to eat dinner together still tickled her ears, yet there had been no message from Taeseong.
Resting her chin on her hand, she pictured him working.
What does he look like at work, I wonder.
Maybe in a suit, leading meetings with staff, approving documents, perhaps even scolding people like that time he’d handled that obnoxious man.
If he gets angry, he might actually be a really scary boss.
Thoughts of Taeseong filled her head. Soon, her imagination began filling in all the years he hadn’t been there: Taeseong as a college student, as a new hire, running hard to earn recognition, and eventually becoming an adult.
If, as he once said, they had been part of each other’s lives past twenty—what kind of future would they have shared?
While she filled that irretrievable time with fantasy, a message arrived from Taeseong.
Sorry, something urgent came up. A dinner meeting. I’ll be late. Don’t wait for me.
Haeyoung pressed her lips together.
“Pfft… Who said I was waiting, anyway.”
Muttering irritably, she headed to the kitchen, planning to cook the jjajang ramyeon she’d bought earlier.
As he had warned, Taeseong still hadn’t returned even past 11 p.m.
Having eaten two packs of jjajang ramyeon, Haeyoung sat at her laptop until 10, then washed up and waited in the living room.
He’d said not to wait, but the idea of retreating to her room felt too empty. After all, wasn’t this his house? The man who had given her such a warm space.
“Yaaawn—”
But even by midnight, there was no sign of him. Her eyelids grew heavy, and eventually she curled up on the sofa and drifted off.
About an hour later, Taeseong finally returned.
Walking through the hall into the lit living room, he found Haeyoung fast asleep on the sofa.
Having been drinking, he looked more disheveled than usual. He had originally planned to dine with her, but a buyer from a U.S. pharmaceutical company—recently signed for a major contract—had invited him to dinner while on a family trip to Korea.
Though framed as a personal invitation, it was inevitably tied to business, so he couldn’t refuse.
The buyer loved to drink, and so he’d joined without holding back. The alcohol left him slightly tipsy.
With a soft smile, Taeseong approached Haeyoung, tossing his jacket and coat carelessly to the floor before sinking down beside her.
Lying on his side to match her height, he simply gazed at her for a long time—just like on that New Year’s Eve ten years ago, when he’d watched her drunkenly sleep through the night.
It felt like he’d become that boy again, bursting with the joy of love, simply because Cha Haeyoung was right in front of him.
Her words from a few days earlier suddenly replayed in his mind:
“It’s been over ten years since we last saw each other. Why would you like me? We’ve barely met. You’re just happy we crossed paths again—or maybe you pity me, and you’re mistaking that for love.”
A faint, self-mocking smile tugged at his lips.
“…Mistake, my ass.”
Despite his crooked tone, her steady breathing soothed him, as though he had finally found the rest he’d been searching for all along.
“A man who, at this age, still confuses something like that? You wouldn’t find one, even if you searched this entire world.”
Muttering drunkenly, he brushed his hand against her cheek, then traced her fine brows, tapped her round nose, and finally lingered on her lips.
At the touch, memories of their first kiss came rushing back: Haeyoung pushing her lips forward, half-threatening that he’d regret it if he didn’t kiss her—and him only realizing his true feelings at that very moment.
“…Ah.”
Clenching his teeth, he shut his eyes as if holding something back, his jaw trembling.
He felt like he might lose his mind.
Those sweet, soft lips kept haunting him. The way she had seemed shy yet yearning, her gestures begging to be remembered.
He wanted to kiss her now. No—he didn’t just want to. He was on the brink of breaking.
Not yet… I have to wait until her heart leans fully toward me.
But the alcohol gnawed at his patience, replacing it with restless urgency.
He had to leave before he lost control. With sheer willpower, he pulled his hand away and started to rise.
“Joo Taeseong…?”
Her voice cracked behind him.
“When… did you come?”
Her innocent tone, so unlike the turmoil boiling inside him, disarmed him.
“…Just now.”
“Did you eat?”
“Yeah.”
“Did you drink…?”
“…Yeah.”
“A lot?”
“A little—”
“Then why are you talking with your back turned?”
Without thinking, Haeyoung tugged at the cuff of his shirt.
All his resolve not to face her crumbled in an instant.
Turning, Taeseong looked down at her with deep, shadowed eyes.
“…Why are your ears so red? Was it cold outside?”
Oblivious to why they had reddened, she reached up to his forehead.
The sudden touch made his eyes darken sharply.
Seizing her hand, he swiftly pulled her down onto the sofa, leaning over her.
Startled awake, she widened her eyes. The plush cushion pressed against her back, and Taeseong’s face was just inches away.
In barely two seconds, the air turned electric.
“Y-you…”
The words stumbled out.
The way he looked at her—so raw and consuming—made her feel she might be devoured.
Caged within his arms, she felt his hot breath fall over her. The strong smell of alcohol told her he hadn’t drunk lightly.
Their eyes locked. From this distance, she could see the fine hairs on his skin, the furrowed brows barely holding back his will, his gaze magnetized to her lips, and the bob of his throat as he swallowed.
Her heart pounded wildly. To break the tension, she forced a joking tone:
“…What’s with you. Are you drunk?”
But his reply was rough, making her own heart tremble.
“…I told you not to wait.”
“…That was my choice.”
Her stubborn answer only deepened his gaze. Gripping her wrist tighter, he spoke each word with clarity.
“I may have patience, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t hard.”
“…If you put it that way… I don’t know how to respond.”
Her voice came quiet as she looked away.
“Cha Haeyoung.”
“….”
“Look at me, Haeyoung.”
The plea in his voice drew her gaze back on its own.
“Haeyoung.”
“…Yeah.”
“Please… accept my heart.”
His voice was stripped of pride and reason, full only of tenderness—and yet, beneath it, loneliness from ten years of waiting, and the hurt of unreturned feelings.
“…Please.”
It wasn’t just a confession. It was begging—showing not only the soft, beautiful parts of his heart, but also its darker, messier depths.
See me. See all of me.
Haeyoung’s chest tightened under the weight of it.
Yet the answer wouldn’t come easily. Answers came with responsibility.
“Taeseong, I…”
“I know what you’re afraid of. But can’t you forget all that, and just think about what you feel?”
“….”
“I’ll take responsibility. For everything. You just have to come to me. If I pull, just pretend you can’t resist.”
“…Taeseong.”
“I know it’s late… but please. Just once. Give me a chance.”
Her eyes trembled helplessly.
His gaze overflowed with longing, heavy enough to make her breath hitch as though a stone had been laid on her chest.
After waiting so long, he’s asking me to give him another chance? That’s not fair…
Because with that face, with that voice—
I can’t help but nod.
“You nodded.”
“….”
“No take-backs.”
There wouldn’t be.
