Chapter 35.
I Don’t Want to See It
“Isn’t he more handsome than Sir Stern?”
“Mm… they’re both handsome. Just different styles.”
“That’s true, but still!”
“He is handsome. The first day I saw him, I even said it was a waste for such a good-looking face to be working as a temple administrator.”
“You? To my brother?”
“Well, I didn’t know he was His Majesty the King back then.”
At that, Lydia burst out laughing, clutching her stomach. She laughed so hard she had tears in her eyes. When she finally managed to calm down, she wiped the moisture from the corners of her eyes and said,
“My brother’s a good person. He hasn’t married yet because he’s busy protecting the throne and keeping the surrounding powers in check, but I can vouch that he’s truly a good man.”
Shanelika thought so too. There was nothing sharp or unpleasant about him, and the more they talked, the more she could sense his kind nature.
But she couldn’t help wondering how Lydia could say such things. It made sense for Shanelika, but for Lydia, his younger sister, it was a different position entirely.
“Lydia, aren’t you resentful toward His Majesty? He tried to force you into marriage.”
It was a question she could ask because she knew how Lydia had been depressed not long ago over being pushed toward an unwanted match.
“That’s separate. I still know he’s doing it for me, even if I hate it.”
“You have a big heart, Lydia.”
“And besides, my marriage arrangement was put on hold recently. Maybe that’s why I can say this now.”
“How?”
“That’s a secret.”
So much for telling your friend everything—apparently some things stayed hidden.
Still, since she didn’t want to say, there was no need to pry. Shanelika didn’t ask further.
Lydia, however, was thinking to herself. Starting next week, she and Eleusis had agreed to cut her lessons with Shanelika down to once a week. The freed-up time would go to her brother. That was precisely the reason her marriage had been postponed.
Brother’s heart seems to be with you. All that’s left is for you to respond in kind…
“Lydia, did something good happen? You seem happy.”
“No, nothing.”
But despite her words, Lydia’s smile was tinged with expectation.
Rumors about Shanelika spread like wildfire. Before long, she had become a familiar figure to everyone in the palace.
The woman who had bewitched both the King and the Knight Commander, Sir Kaisel.
Shanelika had heard the gossip too—it was hard not to when people whispered about her every time she passed. Still, there didn’t seem to be any malice in it, so she didn’t mind.
Besides, there was nothing she could do about it anyway. She was only a conversational companion to Eleusis and nothing at all to Stern. Even if she said so, no one would believe her. And since she wasn’t planning to live in the palace forever, she didn’t care much. Perhaps because she was a dragon, such rumors barely fazed her.
Regardless of the rumors, today was her day off—a chance to get away from the palace for a while. Wearing an ivory dress and a hat pulled low, Shanelika left the mansion in the late morning.
It was a solo outing. Yesterday had also been a day off, but Derwin had been suddenly busy and absent from the mansion. They hadn’t even shared their usual dinners together this week.
Next week, her Garion language lessons with Lydia would be reduced. That meant less time with Derwin, and more time Lydia could spend with him. She’d even overheard Lydia say—without being asked—that she’d be able to stick close to Derwin more often starting next week and was determined to win his heart.
“….”
She’d told herself it didn’t matter whether the two of them ended up together, but the thought of Derwin drifting further from her wasn’t pleasant.
“Lady Shanelika.”
It was just as she was about to step into her carriage. From the opposite side, someone with black hair came riding quickly toward her.
“Oh? Your Grace?”
“Good, I’m not too late. Are you heading out now?”
It felt like it had been quite some time since she’d last seen him. Derwin’s face was slightly flushed, perhaps from riding hard.
“Yes.”
“May I join you?”
“Aren’t you busy?”
“Didn’t you say, ‘Let’s go together’? That you don’t like going alone?”
He remembered what she’d said last weekend.
Shanelika’s lips twitched upward. Yesterday, she’d stayed home instead of going out because Derwin wasn’t around—she didn’t want to go alone. But today she’d felt restless enough to venture out by herself. And now, she could spend the day with him.
“Is anywhere fine with you?”
“Of course.”
“Alright. Let’s go together.”
Her bright reply brought Derwin up into the carriage with her.
By the time they arrived, however, Derwin’s expression had turned rigid. Pointing to the entrance of an art studio, he asked,
“So… you mean to be a model here?”
“Yes!”
The innocent smile she gave him only seemed to make his temper rise. Forcing the words out, he asked again,
“…Completely undressed? Nude?”
“Yes!”
So quick and confident.
Derwin silently thanked his luck for following her from the palace. If she had come alone… he didn’t even want to imagine it.
“I’m sorry, but that’s not happening.”
He stepped in front of the door, blocking her way, his voice firm. But Shanelika just looked puzzled.
“Huh? Why not?”
“Why not…?”
He exhaled sharply. How was he supposed to answer that?
“Wouldn’t it bother you to show your naked body to strangers?”
“Why would it? It’s human art. Artistic expression is beautiful.”
Her goal today was to become a model—not because she wanted to model per se, but because she wanted to have a painting of her human form.
The idea had come to her during the last banquet. Lydia had dressed and made her up so beautifully that even she’d been impressed. But as soon as she returned to her dragon form, she couldn’t see that appearance again. She could always use polymorph magic later, but her own magic would give her a different look than the one Chel had created for her now. She wanted to preserve this exact version of herself.
So, she had tracked down the art studio she’d seen on a previous outing—the one advertising “Nude Model Wanted.”
But clearly, Derwin wasn’t pleased.
“Still, it’s not allowed.”
“Hmph. I didn’t invite you along to ask permission.”
“Lady Shanelika.”
“I want a painting of the real me, with nothing covering me at all!”
Derwin was speechless. Did she truly have no concept of shame?
“Inside, there will be men and women alike, all wanting to draw you. That means many people will see you—completely naked.”
“The more who paint me, the better! Then I can pick my favorite to keep.”
“…Haa.”
Running a hand through his short hair, Derwin felt like he was facing the greatest crisis of his life.
“Imagine if you went to work at the palace nude. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing?”
“That wouldn’t be art, so sure. But art is different! And nothing is more beautiful than pure, unadorned beauty.”
And why exactly must you show that beauty to a crowd of strangers?
It was beyond his comprehension.
“And clothes don’t mean much to me anyway. Dragons don’t wear them in our true form.”
“…Right now, you’re human.”
“Exactly! Which is why I need to preserve my beautiful human form—so even hundreds or thousands of years from now, I can remember it.”
Derwin felt darkness closing in. Was this truly just a dragon’s way of thinking? Or was she actually out of her mind?
“…Is this really that important to you?”
“Yes. I want it. So, so much.”
“Then…”
He took a deep breath. He had to resolve this before she walked in and undressed.
“I’ll bring a painter to my estate to paint you. Will that suffice?”
“One painter?”
“…If that’s not enough, I’ll bring a few more.”
“Hmm…”
She thought for a moment.
“But wouldn’t hiring them cost money? Here, it’s free. And they can start right away—no waiting.”
Ignoring his offer, she moved toward the door. He caught her by the shoulder.
“Lady Shanelika. Even if it’s art, I don’t want you becoming someone’s spectacle.”
And then, he admitted the truth.
“I don’t want anyone but you to see you like that—whether it’s you standing there, or you in a painting.”
His sincerity made her blink. The warmth of his large hands on her shoulders seeped through the fabric of her dress, carrying his feelings straight to her.
“…If you put it that way…”
In the end, she stepped back. If he was going to argue this strongly, ignoring him would only end with him physically dragging her away.
“Your Grace, could you let go of my shoulders now?”
“Are you going in?”
“I won’t. Let’s go somewhere else.”
Only then did Derwin seem to realize he was still holding her.
“My apologies.”
“It’s fine.”
Shanelika turned back toward the carriage, trying to look casual.
Wow, he’s strong.
Her shoulder felt like it had been burned where his hand had touched. The warmth there spread down into her chest, making her heart pound violently.
