CH:29
Aaron, who looked as if he might grab her by the hair at any moment, surprisingly didn’t take any action. He simply glared at Amelia in a rage and left. Only Louis, who returned, clutched his head as if the future looked hopeless.
“What were you thinking?”
That reproachful voice still rang clearly, even days later.
“Did you want all of us to die?”
“Louis.”
“Do you even realize how many lives are bound to you?”
Louis shouted, blaming Amelia. If things had truly gone wrong, the Skipper County would’ve been destroyed.
“It’s madness. Even if you have no fear, this is too much! Of course a child takes after their parents!”
By then, Louis seemed to have forgotten to even speak respectfully to Amelia. He criticized her for spending the night with a man who wasn’t even a brown-haired noble, but a blond one. For giving birth to his child and hiding it, pretending it was a girl. He condemned every one of her actions without exception.
“A boy, and with blond hair at that! If you had told me, I could’ve helped. We could’ve said he died and hidden him somewhere! But this?!”
Louis shouted in frustration. He must have felt the pressure of possibly losing his own life if he continued to treat Amelia with the same relaxed attitude as before.
“You know what? We’re not the only ones who’ve been screwed. You’ve lost your freedom too.”
Even a simple walk would now require an escort, and she’d never be able to meet anyone alone. Even during baths, someone would be watching her. And if she ever spent the night with someone again, there would likely be eyes watching that too.
“You’ll find out for yourself how far the consequences of your childish mistake can go.”
Louis, out of habit, tried to intimidate Amelia. Even though she no longer feared such threats. The people most precious to her were now beyond this wall, beyond Aaron’s reach. That alone gave Amelia immense relief.
“……”
But there was one thing Louis said that lingered in her mind.
“You trust the Emperor?”
That man—Ivan—was the Emperor. The one she thought might be immortal for surviving so many times turned out to be the master of Escliffe.
“The Emperor despises us.”
“……”
“You think he’ll care for your child? You might end up wishing the child had died instead.”
The truth was, her first meeting with Ivan had been based on lies. So was any of what he said true? Did he really love her? Would he at least try to protect the child?
“Enough.”
Amelia sighed and buried her face in her hands. It was only after realizing Ivan was alive and that Ian had survived that she began to have doubts. Ivan wouldn’t do that. He came to save his child.
She wanted to believe that. Amid the chaos, Amelia forced herself to ignore the ominous thoughts.
Creak.
The door to the guest room opened. A middle-aged woman, who had been sitting with her back to the door, turned her head.
“Your Majesty.”
Madam Howard rose to her feet, holding the child in her arms as she recognized Ivan entering the room.
“No need for formalities. Even after all this time, you seem comfortable holding a baby, Madam Howard.”
At Ivan’s remark, Madam Howard smiled gently.
“Of course. I raised Your Majesty in these arms, after all.”
“You weren’t the only one who raised me.”
Ivan corrected the statement, and while he spoke, Madam Howard carefully laid the peacefully sleeping Ian in the crib, gently patting his chest.
“When I held Rodan once, I held Your Majesty twice. You mustn’t forget that.”
She responded naturally. Technically, Madam Howard held the humble title of Viscountess, so speaking casually with the Emperor was improper. But she had been Rodan’s mother and Ivan’s wet nurse—practically a mother to him.
“If Rodan heard that, he’d probably cry out of jealousy.”
“These days, Rodan flinches even if I so much as touch him. Raising sons—there’s no reward in it, really.”
She joked playfully and turned away from the crib.
“We don’t know when Lord Ian might wake, so shall we move to another room, Your Majesty?”
Ivan nodded. He and Madam Howard moved to the side room adjacent to the guest room.
“I’m sorry for calling you here so suddenly.”
“Please don’t say things you don’t mean. It suits you better to say you’ll pay me well instead.”
She replied with mock primness. It wasn’t wrong, so Ivan couldn’t deny it—he simply chuckled.
“But I am sorry. You’re not at the age to be caring for a baby anymore.”
“Thinking of him as a grandchild makes it bearable.”
Madam Howard smiled fondly. When Ivan thought of the word ‘mother,’ this was the image that came to mind.
“He’s cute too—he looks just like Your Majesty did as a child.”
Because of that, even things she probably shouldn’t say didn’t feel wrong coming from her.
“…He looks like me?”
But Ivan didn’t reply with much emotion. From what he’d seen, aside from the hair color, Ian didn’t resemble him much.
“He cries fiercely before falling asleep—just like Your Majesty did when you were young and wouldn’t sleep without me nearby.”
She couldn’t outright say “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” but her meaning was clear. She recalled Ivan’s fussy bedtime habits and said Ian had inherited them.
“It may take him time to adjust, but he’ll do just fine.”
Whose blood runs in his veins, after all?
The unspoken words were obvious. Ivan realized that Madam Howard had already deduced that he was Ian’s father.
“That’s good, then.”
He had no intention of denying it. He hadn’t expected Madam Howard not to notice. And she was one of the few people he didn’t want to be sharp with.
“I’ll take good care of him, so don’t worry.”
“I’m not worried.”
Ivan replied firmly. He chose Madam Howard as Ian’s nursemaid precisely because she was trustworthy.
“I’m honored.”
She looked at Ivan with pride. How could she not be, when the masterpiece she’d raised stood before her?
“You must be tired, so I’ll—”
Knowing how exhausting the role of Emperor was, she tried to let him go. If Ian hadn’t suddenly started crying again, she would’ve done just that.
“He seemed to be sleeping well.”
She clicked her tongue and stood up, quickly hurrying back into the room where Ian slept. Ivan, instead of returning to the main palace, followed behind her into the guest wing.
“I wonder why he suddenly woke.”
She cradled Ian in her arms, trying to soothe him. Her hand on his back was full of warmth and comfort.
“Maybe he’s hungry?”
“He nursed less than an hour ago. It’s too soon for hunger.”
But Ian wouldn’t stop crying. His wails sounded almost anxious.
“Your Majesty, would you hand me the swaddling cloth on the bed?”
At her request, Ivan wordlessly picked up the blanket lying on the bed. Madam Howard wrapped Ian in it and patted him. The crying slowly faded, and his eyes began to close.
Once Ian was back in the crib, Madam Howard turned to Ivan, who was watching the child like he was the most unfamiliar creature in the world.
“I should summon the wet nurse just in case.”
“Now? If you ring the bell—”
“It’ll wake Lord Ian. Just watch him for a moment.”
She nudged Ivan toward the crib and, before he could object, swiftly left the room.
Left to watch the crib, Ivan let out a sigh. His eyes naturally fell on Ian. For whatever reason, a single tear clung to the corner of Ian’s eye. The red glow of dusk made it look almost like blood. Ivan, without thinking, reached out to wipe it away.
“……”
Just then, the child grasped Ivan’s finger. His barely opened eyelids revealed dark pupils. Ivan tensed, thinking the baby might cry again. But Ian, as if comforted by his father’s presence, fell back asleep.
My child.
Ivan had never seen Amelia’s belly swell or witnessed Ian’s birth. Yet there wasn’t a shred of doubt in his mind that this was his son.
“Your Majesty, the audience with Duke Russell is scheduled for 7 p.m.”
But even so, there was no special affection.
He had no intention of formally acknowledging Ian as his son. Staring blankly at the child, Ivan slowly withdrew his finger.
He had work to do.
Ian, now robbed of his father’s warmth, began to cry again in search of him. But Ivan didn’t hesitate to leave the wailing child behind and exit the room.
