Chapter 84
Lucia, who had visited Bern after a long while, discussed various matters concerning their engagement ceremony.
“Then, it would be good to hold the engagement ceremony after the Summer Festival ends.”
“…….”
“The Summer Festival is in just two weeks. Preparing for the engagement ceremony by then would be quite rushed.”
“…….”
“What would be good for the formal attire for the engagement ceremony?”
“…….”
Lucia, who had been looking over the engagement preparation list, raised her head as she received no answer.
She had thought Bern’s condition was a bit strange since they met, but now he seemed completely lost in thought, his mind elsewhere.
Lucia waved her hand in front of Bern’s eyes.
“Bern? Bern!”
“…Ah! S-sorry. What did you just say?”
Bern belatedly snapped back to attention and fumbled about.
“We were deciding on the engagement date, right? I have something before the Summer Festival, so it seems a bit difficult during that period.”
He then brought up something that had already been discussed.
To Lucia’s eyes, Bern still didn’t seem fully alert.
Eventually, Lucia placed the documents she was holding on the table.
“It seems we can’t discuss anything today in this state.”
“I apologize. Are you perhaps angry…?”
“No, I’m not angry. It’s just that you haven’t seemed focused since we met.”
“I’m ashamed.”
Bern hung his head low and kept apologizing. As if tired, he took off his glasses and rubbed his face.
“Today’s meeting was hard to schedule too. You must have been very busy.”
It was a thoughtless remark from Lucia, but Bern flinched as if his foot had been stepped on.
As Lucia said, he should have scheduled the meeting to discuss the engagement much earlier. However, Bern kept making various excuses, postponing and postponing the meeting until it was finally scheduled for today.
“Or is there something troubling you?”
At Lucia’s sincere concern, guilt welled up in Bern.
The reason he kept postponing was precisely because of Selene.
She had continued to linger around Bern even after the day she injured her ankle.
Every time he saw Selene limping with her not-yet-healed foot, Bern couldn’t bring himself to coldly push her away.
In the end, unintentionally, he ended up meeting Selene almost every day.
He hadn’t exactly given her his side, but whether intended or not, it was true that he had met Selene while putting Lucia on the back burner.
Somehow, it felt like he was being unfaithful, and he felt sorry towards Lucia.
“No. It’s just that I’ve been a bit tired lately, I suppose. I’m sorry for making you worry needlessly.”
“Work is important, but please rest properly. You might collapse at this rate.”
“…Yes, I’ll do that.”
“Hmm, you don’t seem to be in a good state today, so let’s stop here, but let’s at least decide on the engagement date before we part. You said you were busy until the Summer Festival, right?”
“Yes, after the Summer Festival ends, things will settle down somewhat, so it would be good to hold the engagement ceremony after that.”
“Then, how about pushing it back considerably?”
“Even further back? Didn’t you say you wanted it before summer?”
“I did, but there’s more to prepare than I thought, so it seems better to set a more relaxed timeline.”
Following Lucia, who let out a sigh, Bern looked over the documents spread on the table.
They were things necessary for the engagement preparations, which Lucia had organized on behalf of the busy Bern.
“I’m sorry it seems you’re going through more trouble because of me.”
“There’s no need to be sorry. You’re already busy with work; I can’t burden you more with this. It’s only right that I, who am relatively free compared to Bern, handle it.”
“Still, you must have had a hard time preparing all this? All the materials are meticulous, and I was surprised there were more things needed for the engagement than I thought. It’s impressive, Lucia.”
Bern offered praise, but for some reason, Lucia felt somewhat uncomfortable.
It wasn’t because of Bern, but it weighed on her mind that she was clinging to the engagement preparations with impure motives.
‘Actually, I chose work as an escape….’
Ever since the day she kissed Helwin, she thought of him every day.
When he even appeared in her dreams to the point where daily life became impossible, she felt like she might run to Helwin, leaving Bern behind.
So she deliberately took on even Bern’s tasks and prepared for the engagement like crazy.
She thought that by preparing for the engagement, constantly reminding herself of her relationship with Bern, and exhausting herself without a moment’s rest, she could erase Helwin from her mind.
Fortunately, while preparing for the engagement, she could avoid thinking about Helwin.
Of course, in between, Helwin sent various letters and gifts, disrupting her efforts to compose herself.
But at least it was fortunate he didn’t come to see her in person.
“Then, shall we postpone the engagement a bit further as you suggested, Lucia?”
“Yes, let’s do that. There’s no need to rush, after all.”
“I’ll help with the preparations as soon as my urgent matters are over. Since we’ve postponed the engagement, please rest a bit now.”
“Ah… Yes….”
In an instant, with her tasks gone, Lucia was afraid Helwin would invade her thoughts again.
But she couldn’t show that.
She couldn’t possibly tell Bern about what happened between Helwin and her.
Realizing she was thinking of Helwin again, Lucia quickly changed the subject to drive him out of her mind.
“You’ll be attending the Summer Festival this time too, right Bern?”
“Of course I must attend. It’s one of the royal family’s biggest events.”
“Then will you also attend the hunting competition on the second day?”
At the mention of the hunting competition, Bern hesitated for a moment.
“Um, to be honest, I’m not talented in physical activities. So compared to others, I’m not very good at hunting. Still….”
Bern, who had been speaking awkwardly, looked at Lucia with a gentle smile.
“For my fiancée, I’ll try to catch at least one fox.”
Was that a seduction? Or was he just being playfully charming as he sometimes was?
For a moment, Lucia, momentarily captivated by Bern’s sudden charm, smiled back.
“In that case, I should prepare a handkerchief for my fiancé. Do you have a favorite pattern or animal, perhaps?”
“Anything from Lucia is fine with me.”
“You know ‘anything’ is the most difficult request, right?”
“Haha, is that so? Well, then….”
As he pondered what would be good, Bern’s face suddenly stiffened.
It was because he had unconsciously thought of Selene.
‘Bern, look at this. Isn’t it pretty?’
During their academy days, in their secret room, Selene boasted to Bern about the handkerchief she had finished.
Delicate flowers were embroidered with beautiful blue thread.
‘What kind of flower is this?’
‘It’s a forget-me-not. It’s my favorite flower.’
‘Really? Is there a reason you like it?’
Selene smiled brightly and whispered in Bern’s ear.
‘Because the flower language of forget-me-nots is true love.’
It was only a year into their relationship. Bern found Selene, who smiled shyly along with those words, incredibly beautiful.
The handkerchief Selene completed that day naturally became Bern’s, and thereafter, Selene often embroidered forget-me-nots.
‘I’m sure there was another flower meaning besides true love….’
“Bern?”
Bern, lost in the past, snapped back to reality at Lucia’s voice.
Not once, but twice, he had thought of Selene right in front of Lucia.
‘What are you doing with your fiancée here. Get a hold of yourself!’
Bern scolded himself, smoothed his furrowed brow, and laughed awkwardly.
“Sorry. I was lost in thought for a moment. I really don’t mind anything.”
“Aren’t you giving me too big of a task?”
As Lucia pouted, Bern laughed.
“If you insist, then please use my Casper family crest.”
Whether that was a satisfactory answer or not, Lucia grinned.
“Okay, I’ll do that. If Bern is going to catch a fox, I’ll have to put in some effort.”
“Ah….”
As Bern flustered, Lucia glanced at him and giggled.
“You’re joking, right?”
“No, I’m not joking? You promised to catch a fox for me first.”
“Ah, goodness… To live up to expectations, I guess I should start practicing hunting now.”
Lucia smiled brightly, saying she’d look forward to it. Then, humming, she tidied up the documents on the table.
Lucia, having gathered the documents, rose from her seat.
“Even if you’re busy, let’s meet once before the Summer Festival.”
“Yes. I’ll definitely make time.”
“You must be tired, so please get a good rest today. I’ll be going now.”
To see Lucia off, Bern followed behind her. Watching Lucia’s flowing brown hair, Bern parted his lips.
“Uh, Lucia.”
Lucia turned to look back. He knew this was truly rude to her, but he thought Lucia might understand.
“Do you… happen to know about forget-me-nots?”
“Forget-me-nots? That’s a flower name, right?”
“Yes, that’s right. When we were talking about embroidery, I thought of forget-me-nots, but I couldn’t remember their flower meaning at all. Do you happen to know it?”
Bern unconsciously swallowed hard.
No matter how unaware Lucia was of the truth, asking about forget-me-nots, which held memories with Selene, was quite rude.
Yet, he was too curious about what flower meaning forget-me-nots had besides true love. He wanted to know right then and there.
Lucia tilted her head and thought deeply.
“I’m not deeply knowledgeable about flowers, but I’m sure forget-me-nots mean true love.”
“Ah… I see.”
So she doesn’t know the other meanings either. Bern’s shoulders slumped without him realizing.
“Ah, there was one more.”
Then, Lucia mentioned another flower meaning.
“Don’t forget me.”
“…Huh?”
“That’s also a flower meaning of forget-me-nots. ‘Don’t forget me.’ It follows true love. Looking at it this way, forget-me-nots are quite a lovely flower.”
Hearing Lucia’s words, Bern felt as if he had been hit on the head.
Only then did he recall what Selene had said to him in the secret room.
‘After we started dating, I started liking forget-me-nots the most. Think of me whenever you see this. Got it?’
Back then, as lovers, it was probably said with the hope of loving each other forever, but now, after their breakup, the meaning felt quite different.
His heart felt empty. The image of Selene’s despairing face when he said he was meeting Lucia came to mind.
“By the way, since you know about forget-me-nots, you must be quite interested in flowers? Usually, men only know famous or common flowers like roses or tulips.”
“…I happened to learn about it.”
“Do you like forget-me-nots?”
Do I like them? Well, I’m not sure if I like them. However, I did think of Selene whenever I saw forget-me-nots.
“I don’t like them.”
“Hmm, is that so?”
For someone saying they don’t like them, his expression seemed to hold a story.
She didn’t know what memories he had with forget-me-nots, but Lucia thought she should embroider forget-me-nots on the handkerchief as well.
“I said something unnecessary. Let me escort you to the carriage.”
Bern immediately snapped out of his thoughts and escorted Lucia.
He saw Lucia off with his usual gentle demeanor.
Update soon!~