𖹭 Chapter 6 𖹭
“You’re an interesting pianist.”
A low laugh.
‘Huh?’
I slowly opened the eyes I had tightly shut.
Still dazed, I carefully looked at Helision’s expression.
A light laugh slipped from his thin lips.
‘What? He’s not angry?’
“You’re today’s performer, right?”
I nodded quickly.
Right now, a strong yes was the same as strongly proving my innocence.
“I caused a small disturbance and ended up interrupting you.”
He had killed a person, yet he called it only a small disturbance.
The original story often mentioned his bad personality, but I had never imagined it was this bad.
Then his next words made me freeze.
“You must have needed time to prepare for your performance.”
‘How did he know?’
Just like Helision said, a performer needs time to settle their heart before going on stage.
But very few people knew that.
Most people only cared about the result of a performance. They never cared about what the performer was feeling inside.
But Helision was different.
Just like in the original story, he seemed to be someone with deep understanding of music.
‘Well, that makes sense. He met the heroine in the first place because he was interested in music.’
Still, I was surprised that he could understand what I was feeling without me saying a word.
“Are you okay now?”
“Gasp!”
In an instant, Helision moved very close to me.
A startled sound escaped my mouth again.
Only then did I realize that I had been silent the whole time.
‘What should I say?’
Honestly, it was hard to say that Helision had completely ruined my preparation time.
After all, he had gotten rid of Melpomene.
“Hmm? Go on, answer me.”
His sensual voice brushed past my ears.
He was acting friendly now, completely unlike before, and that only made chills run down my spine.
Because the person in front of me was not normal.
He was a mad tyrant.
“Y-Yes, of course I’m fine!”
The words came out in a mess.
Maybe because my life felt like it was on the line, I had never been this flustered in my life.
‘This should be a safe answer, right?’
It was the most proper answer possible.
One that surely would not offend a tyrant.
But Helision seemed displeased by something.
His gaze stayed on me.
He narrowed his eyes and looked at me closely for a long time.
Then another unexpected question came.
“Then why are you trembling like this?”
‘Huh?’
I lowered my head.
My hands were shaking.
‘What? Even I didn’t notice. How did he?’
I was amazed by how sharp his eyes were.
Thinking about it, it made sense.
Just a moment ago, I had been standing at the edge of life and death. It would be stranger if my body didn’t react.
‘Because of you!’
I desperately swallowed those words and carefully watched Helision’s mood.
Helision was touching his sharp chin.
Luckily, judging by his relaxed expression, his question did not seem to be asked with bad intent.
“You don’t need to be nervous.”
“……”
“You’re already good enough to have made it this far. Even if you do a little badly, no one is going to scold you. So just play as much as you want.”
As he said that, Helision lightly tapped my shoulder, like he was encouraging a close friend.
For a moment, I felt something strange.
What Helision said was exactly the same kind of encouragement I had heard on the day of my university performance exam, back when I was Ryu Taeri.
My tension slowly began to ease.
My fear of Helision faded.
I had thought Helision was just someone rude to people above him.
But now it seemed he was also informal with people below him.
Seeing how he worried about someone insignificant like me and quietly looked after me.
‘Oh. This is kind of male-lead-like.’
It was time to reevaluate Helision.
“……Mm.”
At that moment, I heard Helision let out a low groan.
I looked up at him.
Something was wrong.
The moment I raised my head and saw him properly, I could clearly see the pain he was going through.
Helision kept frowning as if in agony. He clenched and unclenched his hand tightly.
“Wait a moment… ugh.”
He stopped in the middle of his words and grabbed his head in pain.
I couldn’t help but be shocked.
The original novel did say Helision suffered side effects from using mana and some unknown illness in daily life, but I never imagined it was this severe.
‘Did he really go through this over and over until adulthood?’
In the original story, Helision met the heroine only after becoming an adult.
Before that, he had gone to war against the Lethe Order.
That meant he had only barely reduced this pain after becoming an adult.
This time, because I had tipped off Tersif, the war had ended earlier, so the two of them would probably meet sooner than in the original story.
‘No matter what, that means he has to keep living like this until he meets the heroine.’
I stomped my feet helplessly, not knowing what to do.
Then suddenly, a question came to mind.
‘Is it really because of mana?’
In the original story, villains who overused mana often suffered pain as the price for it.
But Helision looked different from them.
‘No… rather than that…’
He clearly knew how to handle mana, but this pain seemed to come from somewhere deep inside him, from something he could not control.
It felt like something else was completely controlling him.
Then what was that unknown illness the novel mentioned, the one Helision suffered from in daily life besides the side effects of mana?
The puzzle pieces in my head began to move.
And then—
‘Maybe Helision is…!’
A guess flashed through my mind like a spark.
Just then, Helision’s movements calmed as the pain finally stopped.
“……I’ll see you later.”
Helision quickly turned around and started walking away.
It happened so suddenly that I didn’t even have time to say goodbye.
I stood there alone in the empty hallway, staring at his figure as it grew farther away.
…He looked like he was in so much pain.
“Wait!”
That was when I called out to Helision.
I knew this was crazy.
I knew very well that calling after the person who had originally killed me was madness.
If I thought logically, I should never have made this choice.
But…
The protagonist who had always seemed strong suddenly looked so fragile.
As if he would shatter with the slightest touch.
Maybe—
Maybe if what I knew could help him.
Maybe if it could make him even a little better.
That hope swallowed my reason and led me to make this choice in the end.
Helision turned around.
His eyes, like grass wet with rain, looked at me.
“……”
Why was that?
My throat suddenly felt tight.
Trying to steady this unfamiliar feeling, I opened my mouth.
“Your Highness, there’s something important I need to tell you.”
“……”
“Your Highness may not be cursed.”
Misophonia.
A condition where a person reacts too sensitively to ordinary everyday sounds.
I thought that might be the illness Helision was suffering from.
Even in my previous life, misophonia was a rare illness that had only recently become known.
At the same time, it was considered incurable, with no confirmed treatment.
Still, listening to music regularly in daily life could at least ease the symptoms.
‘Of course, I can’t be completely sure this is Helision’s illness…’
The original novel never clearly stated the name of his illness.
But from everything I had observed so far, misophonia seemed the most likely.
‘It might not be right, but it’s better to tell him just in case.’
If Helision really was suffering from misophonia, and if he could improve by following the method I suggested—
Then maybe I could escape the fate of dying because of him.
‘And even if it’s not misophonia, there’s no harm.’
The solution I was suggesting was only listening to music.
It would not damage his body.
After finishing my explanation, I added firmly—
“The reason you often appear at concerts… it was to calm your symptoms, wasn’t it?”
“……”
Helision stayed silent, still looking stunned.
The imperial family was a place where even the smallest weakness could be torn apart.
He was probably denying it because it felt like I had seen through one of his hidden flaws.
“If you listen to songs regularly through a magic device, then even your daily life—”
“Ha.”
That was when a mocking laugh came from Helision.
“Do you think doing something like that would really change anything?”
“……?”
“I’ve already been known as a mad dog for a long time anyway—”
“Why do other people’s words matter so much?”
Without realizing it, I cut him off and argued back.
It was disrespectful.
But I felt like I had to say it.
“……”
Helision looked at me in surprise.
As if he had never even considered those words before.
“Those words are just misunderstandings. They have nothing to do with the real you.”
I had suffered from all kinds of rumors in my past life too.
So I felt like I could understand Helision a little.
If you keep hearing negative things again and again, it starts to feel like you really are something worse than trash.
But the Helision I had read about in the book was not like that.
The Helision who showed his heart to the heroine was actually quite gentle and kind.
And he had even spoken to someone insignificant like me first.
Seeing how he gave me concern and encouragement, he really did seem like a good person inside.
“Sometimes, it’s okay to close your ears.”
“……”
“Your Highness has already done something amazing just by fighting with yourself all this time. So—”
“……”
“You don’t need to listen to people who belittle you.”
