Chapter 10
The prayer room of Elllauno Castle was very spacious. It was fitting for a mansion named “Elllauno,” which meant “small prayer room” in the Elkon language. It was quite ironic that the first head of the Steinway family, who personally designed and named this great mansion, was an atheist at the time.
That was also one of the aspects I found impressive about this castle. In the typical architectural trends for grand mansions, they tended to build a small, simple family chapel within the main building. However, the prayer room of Elllauno Castle was reportedly built large enough to be used without restriction not only by the descendants of the Steinway family but also by the affiliated knights and even the servants. Perhaps because of this, its scale was comparable to the chapel of the Protestant church in Thessena.
I clasped my hands together, lightly kissed my fingertips, and stepped onto the floor of the prayer room. Sunlight, colored by the beautiful stained glass depicting the Goddess and her children, softly dyed the cherrywood floor in various hues.
And from somewhere, I could hear a faint, whispering singing voice. No, I thought it was singing, but I soon realized it was a prayer. I sat down in the back row and waited quietly.
Soon, the voice of the prayer subsided, and the girl lifted her bowed head.
“Lady Diana?”
I cautiously spoke to her.
The girl who turned around, sensing my presence, had round eyes that were very welcome to me, as we had barely exchanged a few words even while having dinner together yesterday.
“Oh, hello, Duchess.”
The girl with fine, golden hair, eyes as blue as the autumn sky, and cheeks as rosy as a ripe apple rose from her seat and curtsied. It would have been perfect if she hadn’t seemed awkward and uncomfortable because of me, but she was a lovely child nonetheless.
“Have you been… well, Duchess?”
“Thanks to you. And you, Lady Diana?”
“I have been well too.”
I suppose siblings are siblings. In the way they used awkward greetings towards a ‘family’ member they saw almost every day, they were undoubtedly alike, even if Diana wasn’t blood-related to Kagan.
But there was a difference from Kagan, who had just stared blankly at me when we first met. Diana became so awkward around me and tried to run away. At first, I was worried she disliked me. I was glad I could hear from Milla that she was naturally very shy.
“I’m sorry if I interrupted. I was going to pray quietly in the back and then leave, but I wanted to say hello.”
As Milla said, we could take our time getting closer. After all, she was a child who would leave soon. The vacation she got due to her brother’s wedding wasn’t long; she had to return to the educational institute in Winifred the day after tomorrow.
So when autumn comes, and Diana returns home…
“N-no, it’s not an interruption. I was just about to leave since my prayer was finished.”
I want to be a good sister.
“So, you don’t have to feel sorry towards me, Duchess.”
Diana, mumbling words that considered my feelings with her face turning bright red, was adorable. Her small stature, not matching her twelve years, was also endearingly pretty.
The girl who lost her father, who had raised his only daughter alone in his old age, four years ago, and followed her foster brother, whom her father had carefully brought in as if preparing for their parting, as if he were her real brother.
I don’t know if she would want it, but I, who also grew up as an only daughter, wished for a sister. If I had a younger sister, my small head was full of things I wanted to teach her and do with her.
“Would it be alright if you had dinner with me today? If you don’t have other plans.”
But for now, just having a meal together would be enough.
At my question, Diana bit her lip and thought for a moment, then nodded.
“Um, I’m sorry that my brother is busy.”
“Huh?”
The sudden apology was a bit out of nowhere. Diana continued, looking quite dejected and gauging my reaction.
“Originally, Ben could go instead, but my brother won’t let him. Father Bien has repeatedly advised that it’s not a desirable attitude for a married man to travel outside his territory alone, and that he should start entrusting things to Ben, but my brother…”
Her voice trailed off.
Ah, I see. So she knew about him going to Duvon. And before that, Kagan had been scolded by the priest in front of his younger sister. Various thoughts ran through my head, but at the same time, it was the first time I had heard Diana speak so much, so my mouth was slightly agape.
“Brother doesn’t have a very good personality, does he.”
“Kagan?”
My eyes widened even more.
He has a bad personality? The man I know is always a polite and well-mannered gentleman. Isn’t he the man who uses the most formal, respectful language even in bed, observing etiquette and procedures?
Surely not. If Kagan treated Diana poorly, would Ben (the son of the Steinway family’s long-time loyal retainers), the head butler, or Diana’s nanny respect and serve him as they do now?
Of course, I couldn’t unilaterally dismiss Diana’s testimony.
“Does he… treat you badly, Lady Diana?”
I thought I asked as carefully as I could.
“Hmm…”
Diana rolled her eyes to one side, looking troubled, and narrowed her gaze thinly. For some reason, the corners of her mouth lifted slightly and twitched.
“He’s a bit mean sometimes, honestly.”
Her voice, whispering discontentedly as if seeking my agreement, was unmistakably the tone of a younger sister complaining about her older brother with whom she has a good relationship.
I relaxed and let out a small laugh.
“Oh dear, how unfortunate.”
So the man I thought was purely stoic and rigid had a side to him that played mischievously with his young little sister.
I wanted to see that unimaginable scene with my own eyes. I wanted to know more about Kagan. Would I ever be able to blend in naturally with them?
Yes, when autumn comes. After the seasons change twice, and when Diana returns home—
“Then, the day after tomorrow, instead of your mean brother, I’ll see you off, Lady Diana. Is that alright?”
Diana thought for a moment again, then nodded gravely.
“Alright.”
She added, however, that he’s only mean sometimes, not always.
Please let my husband, who has left on his journey, return safely after completing his work. Let me be a good sister to his young sister. Let the Steinway family and Wayriver always prosper as the safe and bountiful land it is now…
After offering these simple, if you will, prayers, I left the prayer room. I thought it had only been a short while, but the colored light that had been cast across the floor had already withdrawn its long tail and huddled beneath the window.
I saw a servant holding tightly with both hands the candle to be offered at the altar, entering the prayer room as if to replace me. I quietly greeted him with my eyes. The young man, still wearing his soiled livery, seemed a bit surprised, blushed, and slightly hunched his shoulders to hide the stain on his chest.
Was he ashamed of his dirty work clothes? Or did he think it was disrespectful to me?
The Goddess said not to be ashamed of clothes dirtied by diligence. Moreover, I am merely one person indebted to their hard work.
Holding back the foolishness of preaching such things and stealing his precious break time, I simply showed the young man the kindest smile I could muster and turned away.
Lunchtime would be a sweet, dream-like break in the middle of a tiring day. What wish did that young man, saving that time to come all the way to the prayer room, hold in his humbly hunched heart?
My prayers have always been consistent. I have always prayed to live as a beautiful noble. Because that was always the prayer of my parents who taught me love. Living like them, who left me as their sole treasure in this vast world before departing, was the greatest happiness I knew.
On the other hand, I have always lived keenly aware of how frail and insignificant I am. Reality was like that. It was a world where a fifteen-year-old girl, left completely alone without any relatives, was lucky if she could avoid harm and take care of herself. My parents and I were not unaware of this.
So I simply prayed to live even as a candle that warmly illuminates some cold corner of the world. Grateful simply to earn my daily bread and live under a cozy roof sheltering me from the wind and rain, the days I prayed like that layered upon each other to form the person I am today.
How do other people live? What about that servant who came to the prayer room? What about the other residents of Elllauno Castle? What about the people of Wayriver, living by cultivating the lands outside the castle? What does everyone pray for each day as they live?
Praying for the well-being and happiness of each and every one of them – that must be the life of the Duchess of Wayriver. I have been given undeserved luck.
If someone were to ask me where to start… I suppose I would say from the innermost circle closest to me.
That is, I am very curious about what Diana was praying for earlier.
Thinking of her dainty back as she hurried away, saying she had plans with friends, I let out another chuckle. Surely that adorable twelve-year-old girl also prayed for the safe journey of her mean older brother, right?
“Milady! I heard the Duke has gone to Duvon?”
As I reached my room, Milla, who had been waiting right in front of the door, started bouncing with agitation.
“How could he possibly leave out such important news for just me and you, Milady? Anyway, this is my fault. It’s because I sent him down the mountain too early, isn’t it? Not that there was any other choice back then, since he had just become the successor of the stern Duke.”
“Calm down, Milla. The Duke must have been rushed off his feet too.”
“I was so busy since morning myself, you know? I was getting all sorts of things ready, thinking I would take you both to Lake Ryndel this afternoon to help set a nice atmosphere.”
What is she trying to set an atmosphere for in broad daylight?
“Is it okay if I get a little scared? Haha.”
“Looks like our Milady finds this amusing. I feel more like a nanny for the two of you than a lady’s maid.”
The more Milla grumbled, the lighter my heart felt. Was it because I wasn’t the only close aide left out of important information sharing?
Of course, the fact that the Duke didn’t share business with the Duchess, and the fact that he didn’t share business with the Duchess’s lady’s maid, are completely different levels of issues.
“Oh, by the way, I decided to have dinner with just Lady Diana today. Good call, right?”
When I spoke in a slightly boastful tone, Milla, as expected, responded lavishly.
“Oh, well done! Just hearing that the two ladies I cherish are going to have a cozy time together makes me feel warm inside.”
“I’m not sure if it will actually be cozy. But I was happy because Lady Diana spoke to me first.”
She even said she was sorry her brother was busy. How adorable.
“For Lady Diana to speak first is something, you know? Ever since she was little, even though the Marchioness of Rizen brought all sorts of bribes and tried to charm her, Lady Diana still doesn’t speak to the Marchioness first.”
“Is that so? Can I feel a little proud?”
“Feel as proud as you want.”
“Ah, I wish autumn would come quickly so Lady Diana can finish her studies. We’ll get along like affectionate sisters. Enough to make Kagan jealous.”
