Chapter 4
Edith lay down on the bed she had prepared in advance. Though the knights had laid out the sheets for their own use, the hard floor beneath was still fully felt. Her back ached, yet drowsiness washed over her so completely that she could think of nothing else.
Still, Edith could not fall asleep for a long while. Anxiety pressed on her chest too heavily to drift off easily, yet the fatigue in her body was too severe to stay fully conscious.
On top of that, a chilling dampness rose from the floor, creeping through her entire body. It was the very beginning of spring, and without fire, maintaining body heat was difficult. Her lips trembled.
After tossing and turning several times, a warm sensation settled over Edith’s shoulders. Someone must have offered her their robe. Lifting her eyelids, heavy as if weighed down by lead, she found Ian lying right in front of her.
“It’s been a long time since we lay side by side like this,” Ian whispered softly. The sound of Karl, who had been standing guard, moving a little farther away to give them space, could be heard.
“I was only following proper protocol,” she replied.
“And you don’t even talk to me as warmly as before.”
“…”
Without even giving her a chance to speak, his expectant “hm?” seemed to demand a response, and Edith opened her mouth as if surrendering.
“…It’s not because I dislike you.”
“I know. That was the day you followed me to the training grounds and got caught by Father, wasn’t it?”
From childhood, Edith often followed Ian to the training grounds, a lively space filled with the scent of sweat and the sharp sounds of shouts.
Watching the knights with her eyes, she eventually began pestering Ian. It was during the season when the tender green of spring was turning into lush foliage.
“Brother, I want to learn the sword too. Teach me.”
“Edith, Father would scold us if he knew. A princess has no place learning the sword.”
“But the delegation from Palerion had a female knight. There’s no law in Luheim saying I can’t learn either. Right?”
“What if you get hurt? Even a scar would be terrible.”
“You’ll protect me before that happens, won’t you?”
Ian tried every excuse to dissuade her, yet he was always the one to give in.
“Fine. Starting tomorrow, meet me at the training grounds just before dawn.”
“It’s a promise!”
So delighted, Edith found a tunic and pants that fit her perfectly and waited in front of the training grounds with a beaming smile the next day.
“Your Highness, do you truly intend to teach the princess swordsmanship?”
“Who could ever break that determination? Besides, Edith will be of age in a few years. Let her practice while she can. If it becomes too hard, she’ll give up quickly enough.”
“I think she might persist longer than expected,” Karl commented.
“Ian, as you know, my sister tires of things as easily as she desires them. I bet she’ll be bored within three days.”
“Then I’ll bet she’ll practice for at least three months.”
Ian had thought lightly of it, but Edith was earnest. Even when he made her run to build stamina before wielding a sword, she followed the knights around the training grounds without complaint.
No matter how many times the knights outran her, she continued at her own pace. The pain and exhilaration she felt with every labored breath was the only proof that she was truly alive.
Initially, the knights had seen her interest as the simple curiosity of a princess. But as she returned day after day, their respect for her gradually grew.
“It’s already been a month. It’s wonderful to see the princess working so hard. At this rate, you might even surpass His Highness in height.”
“My small stature is only because I was born two months earlier than others. You don’t need to flaunt it to make me concede.”
“Dare I? You knew this would happen when you asked, didn’t you?”
“Can’t say otherwise. By the way, is it finished already? That was quick.”
“The craftsman took great care. Here, the sword you requested.”
Karl handed over a small dagger from his pocket, adorned with delicate engraving and jewels. Ian smiled with satisfaction at the amethyst decorating the hilt.
“Good. It’s light and fits well in the hand. Beautiful, even for Edith to wield.”
“It’s also quite sharp. Perfect for self-defense.”
“I’d rather it never be needed for that.”
Yet the gift never reached Edith’s hands.
“Edith! You have no sense of moderation! What is that spectacle!”
In the imperial palace, where many eyes and ears were present, there were also many mouths.
Calix III was furious to hear that the princess visited the training grounds daily. Edith was only just beginning to learn the basic moves.
“Father, I want to learn swordsmanship and military strategy too. I won’t neglect etiquette or foreign languages. I won’t disappoint you.”
“Disappoint? You say that, yet your actions disappoint me even more.”
Though the emperor cherished his only daughter, he was deeply displeased with her following Ian and imitating him.
In the Luheim Empire, though no specific law forbade it, men and women’s roles were clearly divided.
A man doing household chores was dishonorable, and a woman engaging in outdoor matters was deemed coarse.
Edith could never understand that logic, but the people deemed her actions improper for a princess. Learning swordsmanship was no exception.
“Know your place! Which princess rolls about with men?”
“But Father, in Rahan and Palerion, women can be knights too. Even the Evernas Deal knight delegation we saw last time…”
“Edith! You will relearn etiquette from the beginning! Raising your voice over trivial matters! Uphold the empire’s dignity!”
“…I am sorry, Your Majesty.”
All of Edith’s efforts over the past month were nullified by a single word from Calix III. She stopped following Ian and ceased trying to mirror his actions. Her once-bright, cheerful laughter vanished instantly.
She merely dressed elegantly, sat quietly, and smiled softly. Her silver hair and fair skin lost their vitality, and her expression grew paler by the day. Only the royal court believed she had finally matured.
“Since that day, you became the perfect princess. Father may have been relieved, but I wasn’t.”
“Next year, I’ll be of age. It’s about time I carried myself properly.”
“That doesn’t suit you at all.”
Edith snorted softly. In this situation, it was fortunate. Even as her body shivered from lingering frustration, darkness and cold wrapped it in concealment.
What use was it to “suit” anyone? Ian didn’t know how many nights Edith had spent crying before yielding to reality. Had he known, his good-hearted nature might have led him to blame himself.
But that was as far as it went. They could share sorrow, but they could not change reality.
Being born into the empire and the royal family was an inescapable constraint. With each day that her heart crumbled, her hopes for the future naturally faded. The imperial palace was a large cage for Edith.
“When I was younger, there were so many things I wanted to do… Now I understand. You can’t always do what you want. To enjoy what is given, you must bear the duties and responsibilities that come with it. I just realized this too late.”
“You’re still young. I should have persuaded Father more… I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s not your fault, Brother…”
Edith’s voice faded. Though no one was to blame, someone had to face disappointment. Over centuries, from the founding of the Luheim Empire, history had rarely remembered those who tried to change entrenched customs.
The old ways embedded in people’s lives and minds were far harder to uproot than one might think. Some surely failed, faced strong opposition, or gave up, just as Edith had that past summer.
As the cold wind bit at their noses again, Ian spoke cautiously. He did not wish to dwell on sad stories tonight.
“Edith, do you remember when we went to Shurt Hill together?”
“How could I forget?”
It was a beautiful place where May maidens danced and young men sang songs of love. Rarely leaving the palace, Ian had once secretly taken her to the spring festival at Shurt Hill.
The memory thawed some of the chill that had enveloped her body.
Edith had picked poppies and cornflowers to make a pretty floral crown, said to grant love. Though the crown was lopsided, it delighted her. She had given it to a friend at the festival as a token of friendship. Ian had been disappointed to lose the crown he thought was his, much like he looked now.
His stiff expression softened, and a smile appeared on his lips, as if recalling the same memory.
“When this cold passes, the flowers will bloom again.”
“Yes.”
“I swear you’ll see that scene again.”
“I trust you. You always keep your promises.”
“Then I’ll need to say something for you too. Later, we’ll find a strong foal. Its coat should be as white as snow. It will match your hair perfectly.”
“Thank you.”
Edith appreciated Ian’s thoughtfulness, gifting her a horse rather than a carriage. Despite the time they had been apart, his gentle demeanor almost brought her to tears.
She took Ian’s hand. The moist, warm heat radiated into her palm.
Something felt strange. The warmth was unusual for someone who had lain on the cold floor. Noticing her reaction, Ian subtly withdrew his hand.
“Brother.”
“It’s nothing.”
That casual dismissal only made her surer. Hastily, Edith pressed her hand to Ian’s forehead.
His body burned like a furnace.
