Chapter 1
1. I Didn’t Want It to Go This Way
The large bedroom held only two enormous beds, sitting awkwardly and leaving the room feeling empty despite their size.
In the two king-sized beds, placed with a small space between them, Inyoung and Sunghyuk lay separately.
Inyoung tried deliberately to regulate her breathing as she attempted to sleep. But no matter how she tried, her breaths came unnaturally.
Suddenly, Inyoung sat up with a start.
She couldn’t let today pass like this. Rising from her bed, she moved straight over to Sunghyuk’s bed.
“Is today… okay?”
The question was off from the start.
But what was even more off was Sunghyuk’s body.
It was as if a single touch from Inyoung flipped a switch; even the slightest stimulation from her caused him to react immediately.
“When have I ever refused you?”
And indeed, he had never refused any of Inyoung’s requests. Whatever she asked for, it was always granted. That was the rule in this house.
In Inyoung’s home, among the servants she brought in, and her belongings… there was nothing here that belonged to Sunghyuk, except for his clothes and books.
Perhaps Inyoung herself… might not even belong to him.
So, every request always came from her lips.
“I like how honest your body is, Sunghyuk. Even if your heart isn’t…”
Even if his heart isn’t?
How could she know what’s in my heart?
Inyoung didn’t understand that Sunghyuk’s body and heart could never be separate. She didn’t know—or even try to know—that his body only moved when his heart moved.
Watching her move with her eyes closed, Sunghyuk could think of nothing but her beauty.
“My beautiful love, Inyoung…”
The words he had never spoken aloud remained locked inside him, even today.
The night’s mutually satisfying encounter ended.
Inyoung exhaled deeply and went to the bathroom.
After a quick shower, she returned to her own bed and lay down, turning her back to the world.
Sunghyuk, staring blankly at the ceiling, slowly got up and showered.
There was some lingering disappointment.
But if Inyoung left no opportunity for it to continue, it was right to end things there.
Sunghyuk hadn’t even considered that Inyoung might only have the energy for one encounter, so he simply believed that her decision was final.
Unable to properly soothe his disappointment, he took a quick shower and then lay down on his bed.
The next morning, as Sunghyuk headed to the dining room, he noticed two suitcases placed right by the front door.
Judging by the color and style, they seemed to belong to Inyoung.
Glancing at them, he happened to see Inyoung descending from the second floor and asked,
“Suitcases? What’s this about?”
He hadn’t heard a word about any trip until now.
“Didn’t I tell you?” she replied.
“Tell me what?”
“I’m leaving for the U.S. right after breakfast. Since Injun oppa is going on a business trip, I’m going with him.”
Injun oppa was Inyoung’s second older brother.
It made sense that she might go along with her brother on a business trip.
But why only tell him this morning, and only after he asked? If she was going to the U.S., she must have prepared in advance. Why didn’t she mention it sooner?
Was yesterday… just a one-time thing before leaving?
Sunghyuk forced down the rising irritation.
“I’m going on a U.S. business trip too later. Why do you have to go with your brother…?”
Inyoung, in charge of BR Group’s scholarship foundation, didn’t have much work, commuting every other day. The U.S. trip likely wasn’t for any urgent reason, so why insist on going with her second brother?
Feeling like he wasn’t her first priority, Sunghyuk’s expression darkened.
“It’s easier to go with oppa, and there’s something I need to handle this time, so I have to go with him.”
Easier with oppa…
Her words echoed in his mind, and he barely registered the rest of what she said.
Right. I’m neither the first priority, nor the easier choice, nor the one she’ll travel with.
Maybe this was for the best, given that his own schedule during his U.S. trip would make it hard to accompany her.
The two sat at opposite ends of the large dining table, eating breakfast in silence.
By Inyoung’s side sat her nanny, An Seong-daek, who had cared for her since childhood. Busy attending to her every need, she poured milk when Inyoung wanted milk, cut bread into bite-sized pieces, and fussed over everything as if she were tending a baby.
An Seong-daek had come to care for Inyoung when her mother fell ill at childbirth, and she had continued to attend to her like a child ever since.
Watching her, Sunghyuk had two thoughts.
First, a sense of frustration: with An Seong-daek doing everything, Inyoung might be unable to even hold chopsticks, clip her nails, or open a juice bottle on her own.
Second… a pang of regret: he wanted to do all those things for her, but An Seong-daek already did them, leaving him with nothing to do.
Perhaps it was the second thought that dominated Sunghyuk’s mind.
So he watched An Seong-daek attentively as she cared for Inyoung.
Regardless of his intentions, his close attention was easily misinterpreted.
‘Does he have to watch me like that while An Seong-daek is taking care of me?’
Inyoung, noticing his displeased gaze, simply became angry.
An Seong-daek had cared for her from birth.
Now, without her, Inyoung didn’t know what she could manage on her own.
An Seong-daek was the only person who could help her with what lay ahead.
So she couldn’t understand—or didn’t want to understand—Sunghyuk’s gaze today.
After a breakfast filled with mutual resentment, Sunghyuk left for work, and Inyoung left for her flight.
Arriving at New York Airport, Inyoung first attended to official BR Group matters with her second brother, Injun.
Though her scholarship foundation wasn’t profit-driven, all BR Group funds flowed through it, so Inyoung needed to monitor the financial flows. This was a good opportunity to check overseas expenditures.
She also accompanied her brother as a reliable partner in meetings and events while in the U.S.
After several days of official matters, Inyoung and Injun traveled to M Clinic in Minnesota.
In fact, the main reason for the U.S. trip was to have Inyoung’s condition checked at M Clinic.
Five years ago, she had undergone surgery for a meningioma at this hospital. Lately, her headaches had worsened, and cross-checking her condition was necessary. Though she had tests done in Korea, a cross-examination at M Clinic was required.
For three years, she had check-ups every six months in Korea, then annually thereafter. Now, she wanted confirmation from the clinic where she had surgery. Perhaps she wanted reassurance that previous Korean assessments were wrong, and that the recurrence risk of her meningioma had been overstated.
However, MRI and neurological tests in the U.S. confirmed that the meningioma had indeed recurred.
‘So that’s it.’
The headaches and nausea weren’t pregnancy—they were due to the recurrence of the meningioma.
Inyoung had desperately wanted to become pregnant.
Over the past two years with Sunghyuk, there had been no pregnancy.
Sunghyuk had confirmed before marriage that he had no fertility issues. So the failure to conceive over the past two years felt like Inyoung’s fault.
The many pregnancy tests she had taken were useless.
